Middle class families seem so much busier in the run up to Christmas

[Santasfakebeard]

The mc families in DC school seem to have something on the whole month of Dec judging by the dc's class whatsapp groups. Is it just a middle class thing? Pantos, choirs, concerts, wreath making & mulled wine family evenings, markets abroad, carol singing.
I would love my dc to experience it all but we simply don't have the funds.
Is it just the mc & umc that can afford to offer their dc those festive experiences?

Christmas activities are expensive-even technically free ones like christmas light hunting or movie nights can end up costing money. More money=more activities. Also being able to outsource things like present buying and wrapping takes one less chore away, and frees up time for fun

Im not MC. But we have a packed December.
2 school plays. Free
Light switch on. Free
Santa visit at garden centre £30 for 2dc
Nearby city Christmas light display. Free ( few quid parking)
Craft fayre at dc school £3 for 2 dc
Local attraction santa free ( ticket holders)
Christingle with school. Free
A festive parade. Free
Breakfast with santa £20 for both

Look on fb at events nearby. Lots free.

How have people already seen Santa? It’s the 26th of November!! The only thing that I have noticed people already going to is lights being turned on.

We don’t have much planned now that the kids are a bit older. We will go to the school Christmas fair this week, there’s a Christmas concert they are playing in, we might book a light trail and we are going to a panto after Christmas.

We don’t have friends or a big family to be invited to things really.

Oh and a presentation for dcs hobby combined with a Party. Free ( £10 if you want a dvd)

Thank you so much @WrongSwanson @DoYouAgree @OceanicBoundlessness and @Scottishskifun these are great ideas! My whole family lives abroad and my partner's parents too, and they don't come around in December (too expensive) we meet in January instead, so before having my lockdown baby, I never really cared about doing anything Christmassy like this. It is only now that she really gets excited about these things that I realise I'm really rubbish and have no fun ideas. I appreciate you guys spending the time to write these, sounds like a lot of fun I can actually do with her!

We are doing a variety of Christmassy things, I’ve got 2 DC’s aged 6 & 2.

This weekend we went to a family forest school session which was lovely - lots of Christmas arts and crafts, making bread and toasting in on the fire etc. for the 4 of us it was about £25 for a few hours.

Today I took them to a lovely local indoor play area that now been decorated in a winter theme which was another £20. Im taking my youngest to a pre school panto mid week which came to about £18 for the both of us.

Next weekend we are going for a meal with friends and their children for a pre Christmas get together. Then I have a works Christmas afternoon tea (£15) not long after this.

My youngest has a Christmas craft activity morning which is free and we get to listen to carols and drink some mulled punch/mince pies. Then my eldest has a Christmas party day, Christingle service & Christmas play. They are also going to see a local panto (we’ve donated some money towards this as mainly paid for by friends of school). There is also an after school club Christmas fete which my eldest attends.

We are then going to see Santa at a local garden centre with friends mid December before schools breaks up (think this was around £25 for both children). We will probably then meet with family for get togethers at their houses prior to Christmas day. I probably sound middle class but don’t think we’ve gone overboard with anything in particular - they are mainly little things here and there but appreciate they do all add up cost wise.

Hahaa. The classes near me were £40 years ago. This year the cheapest I’ve seen was £60 and there’s one charging……£80 . I kid you not.

Not MC but we do Christmas as a season and not just a day. From Dec1st we would be busy Chirstmas parties, baking, crafts, panto or West End musicals as DC got older, game nights, cinema, winter wonderland, lights. Mixture of free/local/pricey but no elf or boxes aside from Lego Advent calendar and a few gifts to open on Christmas Day.
Usually start Christmas season planning/present buying from September, so it is all in place mid November.

What is class these days? If you have money, regardless of class, you can then afford to do these things.
I have booked a few things this Christmas, some are free and some are not. Friend is taking my child to Christmas at Kew but only because she has a member pass, ( so that’s free) going to a meet the greet with santa, doing the wishmas secret cinema and maybe a panto (not sure yet, they might be a bit young for a it) but only because I have the income to do so…. Not really thought about my class!

I'm taking dd4 to a Glyndebourne Christmas Concert - only £10 a ticket. Not the best view but the same experience. Bargain!

We do have things on but not all £££.

We watch local small town lights switch on, with a bit of carol singing & mulled wine. Its free.

We always go as a family to choose a tree at a farm that has a pretty christmas shop. We don't really buy anything except the tree and we spend the afternoon decorating it.

We go to the school Christmas fair. Eldest is in the school choir who sing, im usually volunteering on a stall. Kids only ever want £1 for the sweetie jars.

One year we did make wreaths from greenery etc we got out and about. Free.

This year we have booked for a local am dram christmas theatre trip. It was a bit pricey (£60) for 4 of us but in previous years we've done the family carol service at a local church which is free/donate what you can - we donated a few quid but not everyone does.

The salvation army band always play carols on the same saturday by the rail station and if we're free we walk by and listen. Free/donate what you can.

We have a meet up with my siblings and kids the weekend before christmas, all the kids play board games and eat pizza. It costs the price of the (supermarket) pizza.

I'm not MC but my DC like 'doing' things thankfully (because I don't). In the run up to Christmas, we typically do a 'Santa Claus' experience (elves workshop/Mrs Claus baking sort of thing) although I'm unsure if the DC will be entertained by it this year. I was looking at a lights walk instead. We will go to a Christmas market because I enjoy them and we will go ice skating a few times because DC enjoy it. We will go to the pantomine which I agree is expensive, we will go out for a couple of meals, DC's will play music in a concert and their activities all have a 'Christmas evening'.

Out of the above - the expensive things are Christmas/Santa experience, and the pantomine (although I bought the tickets for this years one last January so managed to finally get cheaper tickets but unfortunately still £££). Ice skating is approx 25 for the kids (they are able to skate so this year I am not going to go on the ice although DH might want to). Scouts are doing an activity that costs 25 which I think is a bit much tbh and a present exchange which will be another 15. I remember reading before that Scouts was a cheap activity but our local group seem to always have additional activities which are optional but DC always wants to do them.

We will buy a tree in a local shop which I will decorate and in a few weeks take down again and wait for them to come and take it away. I hate the whole tree thing and would be happy not to bother. Its a complete waste of time.

Personally I will do very little other than drive them around. DH's family will swim on Christmas morning and we will spend the following day with them (listening to them whittle on about it).

December is a long month and doing the above will not mean we are busy, just that we are doing some nice things. What makes us busy is that there will be the usual birthday parties thrown in which means we are trying to fit things into a schedule which isn't fun.

Christmas day itself will be a quiet affair. The kids are into computers now so we will have to drag them out to the park for a walk. I'd be more than happy to order pizza for dinner and crash in front of the fire with wine. We don't buy into the whole 'huge' Christmas dinner thing so its just a roast chicken/potatoes/veg with a couple of nice (shop bought) puddings. (Every year I see people with trolleys laden down and wonder how many people are they having for dinner. We don't have any guests at all over Christmas. Imo that must be what makes Christmas special. In our house its just like any other day after we open gifts.

We don't do

Elf on a shelf
Christmas eve boxes
Visits to/experiences with santa
Panto (not my thing)
Lapland etc
Light shows

I don't think it's about mc its more about how much money you have. Me and my husband are definitely not middle-class but we are also not short of money because we made sure we were financially sound before having kids another reason why we only had one. It's our money and I wanna spend it on my daughter to do 1 in million things the month running up Xmas why shouldn't I?

We will be doing a walk in the woods, the local Christmas lights trail, the main town light switch on, a Christmas market, watching Santa drive around the town (courtesy of the Rotary club), and going to a local garden centre to see the displays. We no longer go the Christingle after the Incident With The Candle, but will be going to the school carol service. All of those are free to do.

We will invite some friends over to do Christmassy things at some point. Possibly with a mince pie and some mulled wine.

I have bought this year’s Christmas jigsaw from a charity shop, and that will be going out soon.

The only think I will pay for this year will be ice skating (if we can find somewhere with a rink).

We are both professionals, so I don’t know if that is middle class enough for MN.

As for wreath making if you have a woods around you can get everything you need free. There are tutorials on you tube if you need a starting point

Surely the point is to go to a centre where they supply what is needed and show you - while you halfheartedly and giggling - follow along while drinking some wine and listening to music while chatting to the people beside you.

Do people going really attend because they want the actual wreath itself?

I don’t think we are MC (if we are, definitely lower MC) but we go out every weekend at least one of the days and we do stuff every weekend for Christmas! Experiences mean a lot to us. Things we do and happy to share incase it inspires anyone
-Christmas tree farm
-Visit with Santa
-Family meal out
-Zoo lights trail
-Walking around neighborhood to see Christmas lights/decor
-Christmas market
-Fondue and hot chocolate night at home
-Visit to a village decorated lovely for Christmas
-Another light trial at a place we already have a membership for
-Making cookies and gingerbread men and decorating
-Work Christmas do

So written down we will be very busy alongside fitting in family/friend visits but we love it! I grew up without much money but we always did stuff at Christmas. I’ve also been skiing many times at Christmas/New Years (as an adult so funding myself, no rich relatives sadly) and I certainly didn’t have rich friends to stay with! I stayed in a YMCA. There can be fantastic deals around. We have done German and Austrian Christmas Markets but that was our big trip of the year. I don’t see as many people thinking those who book summer trips are necessarily MC or UC. Money definitely gives more opportunities but if you want to do stuff OP there’s so much fun to be had! No shame in wanting to stay home and chill either!

What is the candle incident?

Fondue and hot chocolate night at home This is the type of thing I want to do. I have dreams of us all chatting around the kitchen table with some music and doing (erm.. not sure).

The reality is the DC will say they want hot chocolate, they will overfill their mugs with marshmallows, eat said marshmallows with a spoon making a mess everywhere, will drink half the mug, and abandon it within five minutes because they've had enough and its 'boring'. I will stack the dishwasher and clean up the mess in an empty kitchen.

Can you pls share how you make an evening out of this activity?

Absolutely. Some of the highest energy people I know are not the middle classes, but those having to do 3 jobs just to make ends meet, and most definitely don't have the funds or time for wreath-making etc.

Round where I live, the people spending silly money on Santa Experiences, festive train rides, light walks at local stately homes etc aren't always what you might call middle class. It's very competitive, but I'm not entirely sure class is the main driver (not the old-fashioned sense of class, anyway).

Wreath making round here can be stupid money, I agree ( £50, £60 for a 'workshop' where you wire some ribbons and pinecones onto a metal ring!) but a lot of the sessions are run by local schools or charities so it turns into a fundraising thing, rather than (necessarily) a competitive display. It's piss-easy to make a nice greenery wreath anyway - you don't even need a base if you make a good thick ring with ivy first. And you can usually take away offcuts of spruce, etc, for free from anywhere selling fresh Christmas trees.

I'd consider our family MC but not particularly moneyed. There's no way we could afford panto tickets AND a continental Christmas market (I wish!) AND meals out all the time AND an all-singing, all-dancing Santa visit AND a lights walk! I honestly don't get how some people spend so much, but there we are - boosting the local economy, I suppose. We do a panto most years, visit the Christmas market in the local city (but probably not spend much), and I can't think what else that costs lots.

Totally agree op. Just had a look at the usual local Christmas highlights lots of our friends do and for a family of 4:
Christmas lights £69
Skating £75
Panto £96

That doesn't include drinks, programmes, transport. Just not happening

The difference is MC people are busy with or without kids. They are setting up and running the wreath making classes, the wine and cheese pairings, the winter foraging group, the Christmas charity clothes sales, chaperoning in the theatre, volunteering in church, making things for the craft shows/ art sales for charity, etc etc.
They were busy with kids stuff when the kids were little but it doesn’t stop when the kids turn into teenagers and leave home. The children all seem to come back and work weekends or doing a bit of catering/ waitressing with a side hustle of showing off singing and musical instrument skills by busking or gigging for the aforementioned classes and charity shows.

We had money (not loads but plenty) growing up and we didn't do anything. Not One Thing. I think I make an effort for my DC because I don't want them to grow up remembering Christmas as quite a sad and lonely time.

I don't find it easy to 'act' like its such a fun time and very often I find myself muttering 'whats the point'/'what a waste of money' but I make myself put on a performance of being 'happy'. Fake it until you make it is my internal motto when it comes to emotions.

Exactly.

I remember my friend working two jobs while studying full time, and catching up on sleep on the bus. No time for wreath making or mulled wine parties but I can guarantee she was (and is) more tenacious than any MC professional I know.