Has this place become even more batshit than ever recently?

[TheLongpigs]

I know places change and there are seasons, but having read the bitchy, judgey, snobby and entitled replies on curtains and cruises in the last 24 hours, I wonder what's going on.

There's no humour behind these posts - just blatant nastiness. People increasingly seem to revel in saying things they'd never ever utter in real life.

Even as I write this I'm aware that there are thoughtful, hilarious, supportive and intelligent corners of MN, but it's hit and miss finding them these days.

Some odd comments on this thread too especially as the op was only asking for advice :

There's one about Christmas / potential birth over Christmas / MiL wanting to visit which is part sensible and part batshit as well!

I agree. I've been here since 2012 and I miss the crying laughing which used to happen often. It's very humourless in the main now.

My first introduction to Mumsnet was the toddler tantrum over the cut up pear. I was pregnant then... that child is at Secondary school now...

I think it was during Covid it went barmy. A lot of scared people riling up other scared people

People are poorer than they used to be, plus scared by the constant bad news from Ukraine/Gaza/China etc etc, so they’re angrier and nastier when then think they can get away with it. It’s a shame.

I also think there are far more men on the site than there used to be, there’s so much more male-type aggression/misogyny in posts.

I also think there are far more men on the site than there used to be, there’s so much more male-type aggression/misogyny in posts.

The view I find more convincing, and less stereotypical is that women can behave like this too. Once again, people are often accused of being men due to what they say or how they say it and your view rests on that assumption.

Thanks for mansplaining it for us all

You're welcome.

There are still many many lovely people on here , unfortunately I feel there are many more people at the 2 extremes in life- either not got a pot to piss in or incredibly privileged but moaning because they can longer have a £1.5m house in the Home Counties and work part time.This creates bad vibes in part and lots of negative comments because we then get total intolerance of the other persons situation.

It's certainly been more noticeable in the last 3 or 4 years

Seems to be a dramatic evening at mumsnet hq

We seem to not have the mn royalty as much as we used too ?

Genuine question, how did he mainsplain? He politely expressed his view. You seem rude here.

@TomPinch I don't think you were mainsplaining at all. You politely explained your thoughts.

Thank you. I appreciate this - when my notifications showed a reply to my last post I'd assumed I'd got another rocket from someone.

Everyone is stressed to fuck. The Tories have broken the country basically. Of course some people will behave badly in a consequence free situation.

It's not really reasnoble to compare internet 10 years ago to MN now.

There are a lot of posters that are kind, helpful, funny, and reasnoble. I learn things on here that I wouldn't have learned about anywhere else.

I've been supported on MN when I was at my lowest and have been given support.

I'm annoyed at some people at times, sure, at believe they act a bit unreasonable but there's no place 100 % perfect.

MNHQ are excellent and fast at moderating but somehow get very little thanks for it. Places like Reddit everyone is supposed to agree and little moderation, ever.

There's a thread about working from home that's just full of people going "This is NOT allowed because of whatever."

Like duhhh obviously the OP (and anyone else who wfh) doesn't do the same job as you? Because amazingly different people do different jobs?

I see this a lot on MN, posters who genuinely can't wrap their brains around the idea that anyone might have a lifestyle that differs even slightly from theirs.

@TurquoiseMermaid Totally!

A recent one that made me chuckle was the lady who lived in Cambridge wondering whether a bike was a good Xmas present for her DC because it’s a necessity for their commute and a poster said something like “How on earth could a bike EVER be a necessity? I drive my DC everywhere, we live very rurally and cycling is unsafe so they just use their bikes in the park” …

Just apparently unable to comprehend that people have different lifestyles and children in different places might use bicycles more than her own kids…

But that is also the reason I love mumsnet, you really get all sorts and are exposed to so much outside of your “bubble” - it’s one of the only places on the internet where the algorithm can’t get to you so much to shelter you from other world views.

Half the issue is that nasty comments are taken seriously. All the replies are then quite vitriolic and the threads egger nasty. Putting people right seems to be much in evidence.
Maybe if other posters reacted with a humorous put down or even better just pointy ignored things might be lighter and better discussed.

I think online is the only place people can vent. You can be as nice or as shitty as you want online. There is now so much pressure irl, people are pulled in too many directions (of their own making, or not) and don't feel they have any control. Online you can let out that pent-up frustration without any real consequences. It's a sort of surrogacy. 🤷‍♀️

@Mumtobabyhavoc which is ok until it turns into actual nastiness. But I get what you mean.

@Wheeking15 didn't want to write an essay, but respond in a more general way. I also don't mean to ignore online bullying, exploitation, etc. A separate (and deeper) conversation, perhaps?

Not so much bullying which is targeting somebody over time but people just being a bunch of utter See You Next Tuesdays just because they can. Exploitation I don't see on here really.