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Original poster

Did you know how many DC you wanted before you had them?

70 replies

nofussatall · 05/11/2023 20:46

If you knew how many you wanted it, did you stick to it?

I can think of so many reasons why it would be sensible for us to be one and done. Time, energy and financially! However I have a friend who is also TTC and sure she wants 4 kids. Maybe we will both change our minds! Did you :-)

OP posts:
fratellia · 05/11/2023 20:49

I wanted 3 but second child turned out to be autistic with additional needs so the idea of one more was quickly forgotten about

KateyCuckoo · 05/11/2023 20:50

Yes 3 and I had 3.

trulyunruly01 · 05/11/2023 20:51

We had grand plans for 4.
I grant you ours were tricky ones but we stopped at 2 and never regretted it

princesspeppax · 05/11/2023 20:51

I wanted 4, currently have 3

BigBoysDontCry · 05/11/2023 21:00

Plan was 2 or 3. Took over 4 years to get pregnant with No1 and then No2 was born 13 months later. By that point I was 35 and DH was 40.

We couldn't cope with another with a small gap, didn't want a large gap as we weren't getting any younger, so that was that.

I wanted boys and had 2 boys but I had a hankering for a girl about 5 years later by which point DH had already had a vasectomy and I didn't really want another baby and chances are that it would be another boy anyway.

mindutopia · 05/11/2023 21:00

Yes, I always wanted two and I knew after I had my second that I wouldn’t want to have anymore. Not for any reason other than I knew these were the children who were meant for me.

SnapdragonToadflax · 05/11/2023 21:02

Wanted one, had one. No desire for another, beyond a vague wish that he had a sibling every so often. I'm a bit old now though, and have absolutely no desire to be pregnant again as it was shit.

CaveMum · 05/11/2023 21:03

Always thought I’d have 3, but we were done after 2. Combination of traumatic birth, PND, and just the sheer upscaling of logistics that a third child would entail - new car, more expensive holidays, etc.

minipie · 05/11/2023 21:04

Wanted 2, had 2. But there was a period after having DC1 when I definitely wasn’t having any more…

Multipleexclamationmarks · 05/11/2023 21:06

I wanted none.
I have 3. 🤣

JustOneMoreBiscuit55 · 05/11/2023 21:21

Wanted 3 or 4, ended up having difficulties conceiving and then had recurrent miscarriages. After years of heartache, we eventually got our miracle baby. Would still love 3 or 4 but realistically that's unlikely given our history and time not being on our side (I'm 40 in a few months), so what will be will be. If we have any more it would be amazing, if we don't then our precious DC is more than we thought we would ever have and so feel very lucky anyway.

Mischance · 05/11/2023 21:23

I wanted 6, but had to stop after 3 .... piles, serious back problems.

PinkRoses1245 · 05/11/2023 21:24

Never assume we will have any, it’s impossible to plan. TTC #1 after recent miscarriage, anything will great.

Olika · 05/11/2023 21:30

I left having children so late that I knew realistically if we managed to have one then that was it. When I was younger I never thought of how many kids I would want etc.

ThreeRingCircus · 05/11/2023 21:32

I always wanted 2 or 3 and ended up with 2 DDs. After a difficult birth which left me with some health issues after DD2 I knew we were done. I didn't want to risk my health again, knew we were lucky to have two healthy children and I didn't feel that as a family we were missing anybody as DDs already had each other.

Chimeforanamechange · 05/11/2023 21:32

I always wanted two, a boy and a girl. I got two, a boy and a girl, I now want a third, but I won’t!

Chocolatecoveredshitpig · 05/11/2023 21:34

Always thought I'd have 3 or 4. After 10 years and several rounds of ivf, dd finally came along. Couldn't afford any more treatment and our chances of falling pregnant naturally were estimated at less than 1%, so dd has remained an only. To be honest, I don't think I'd have actually coped with 4, plus dd has ADHD so I'm glad she's my one and only. I'm now 49 and DH is 60, so no chance of any more!

slopsan · 05/11/2023 21:35

Wanted 1.
Had 1.

erikbloodaxe · 05/11/2023 21:36

Wanted 3 boys
Had 3 boys

BitofaStramash · 05/11/2023 21:37

Yes. Wanted 3. Had 2.

Fertility problems just made it too difficult.

kikisparks · 05/11/2023 21:37

Once upon a time I wanted two children (in my mind they would have been boys). For a long time I have only wanted one, years of infertility compounded that and then pregnancy, birth and the newborn stage compounded it further. We have one DD and she could not be any more wonderful and our family feels complete.

Pooheadbumbum · 05/11/2023 21:38

I’d never really given it much thought when I was younger, but assumed I’d have 2, like my own house growing up.

I had 2, then realised I’d actually like 3…. Now have 4… it’s A LOT!

PurpleOrchid42 · 05/11/2023 21:38

I think I originally thought one would be enough, but regardless of having a traumatic delivery, the very next day I looked at her beautiful face and said 'I definitely want another!' And I did have a second, 3.5 years later. I think I would've had a third, except that both my 2 are autistic, and struggle with emotional regulation, social skills etc. so I honestly don't think I could hack it!

PrincessHoneysuckle · 05/11/2023 21:40

Yes one and done.Ds is nearly 10.

PrincessHoneysuckle · 05/11/2023 21:41

SnapdragonToadflax · 05/11/2023 21:02

Wanted one, had one. No desire for another, beyond a vague wish that he had a sibling every so often. I'm a bit old now though, and have absolutely no desire to be pregnant again as it was shit.

Same for me.Had a horrendous birth too.