Did you know how many DC you wanted before you had them?

[nofussatall]

If you knew how many you wanted it, did you stick to it?

I can think of so many reasons why it would be sensible for us to be one and done. Time, energy and financially! However I have a friend who is also TTC and sure she wants 4 kids. Maybe we will both change our minds! Did you :-)

Fancied the idea of a houseful, but my practical head told me any more than 3 would be unwise.

So we had 3.

I didn't want any for a long time.

Then DH and I decided to go for it and we have 2 lovely boys with a 3.5 y gap. I couldn't have more kids than I have hands to grab them with!

In all unvarnished honesty I think big families are crap for kids (I was the ignored 2nd of 4, so speak from experience) and I also know a lot of messed up only kids (DH is one of those) so all things considered 2 suits us perfectly.

Wanted zero, then was one and done with DC1, then had DC2 after a few more years. If I'm honest it was a bit of a strategic move and a decision made with head not heart nor hormones. But it's worked out well and we're very happy.

I always thought I'd have 2. Pictured a boy and a girl like me and my brother growing up.

Reality was after 1 and suffering with a traumatic birth and horrendous PND I never felt like I could do it again.
So I am one and done and do sometimes wonder what things would have been like if it had been different.

I always wanted more than one as I'm an only child and didn't enjoy it.

DH is one of 3, he always wanted 3.

Had 6 mc's then DD1. Loved my time with her so decided to try and have another, had 4 mc's then DD2.

I felt very happy, slightly wistful about not having another, but felt after so many mc's, with two beautiful, healthy, happy, blue eyed, blonde haired daughters that life was pretty perfect and I felt very grateful.

A few years later I had an extremely vivid dream - came home one day to a brown eyed, brown haired teenage boy smiling and saying 'hello mum' as I walked through the door.

I'm not 'woo woo' EVER, don't believe in ghosts, spirits, signs of things, I'm not even nominally religious at all. Straight up practical science bod. I poopoo everything slightly coincidental.

Chatted to DH about possibly trying for another, he agreed. Only a month later I fell pregnant with my now 7 year old DS. And yes, he has hair and eyes the colour of chestnuts.

They day I found out (while i was at home and she was at school), DD1 told everyone in her class at school she was having a brother with brown curly hair. Her teacher took me aside and asked if I had some good news to share. I was so astounded I told her the truth, that I had taken a test while DD was at school! She wasn't at all surprised, she said it happens a lot with siblings. And yes, his hair is also incredibly curly.

Can't explain any of it.

More than one, less than nine and I have five.

I always wanted four. Sadly impossible. I am very, very lucky yo have my two.

Wanted 3. I had 1 then had miscarriages followed by infertility. I was finally coming around to accepting my one and only after rounds of failed IVF when I finally got pg again and had twins!! I feel incredibly lucky and thankful for the wonders of modern medicine.

One. Had one.

Yes, two and two.

I was having none and now have 2! Would probably have gone on to have more if age was on my side.

We wanted 4, and had 4 and are very grateful for them.

I was ambivalent about having any - missed out on all the biological urges other people seem to have, so it became a rational ‘pros and cons’ decision.

Eventually DP and I decided we’d have just the one. No one believed we’d stick to that decision - including my obstetrician who, after an extremely complicated pregnancy and birth, told me she’d ‘see me again in a couple of years’ (despite the fact that ‘seeing me again’ would involve a fair bit of risk on my part and surgery to make any further pregnancy safe - I have large fibroids).

Didn’t much fancy the risk or the surgery. We still have just the one.

I wanted 3/4. I have one with no chance of another. Sad but it is what it is.

I always wanted 4, the moment my DD was placed on my chest I felt a high like no other and that increased to 6!

She’s an IVF baby so just incredibly thankful she’s in our lives, we will try to give her a sibling and if that doesn’t work, we will still feel like the luckiest people in the world to have DD at all.

Thought we would have one, ended up with three (one planned, one unplanned). DS1 and DIL are definitely one and done which is absolutely fine although I do wish it wasn’t due to a combination of DS’ PTSD after a shocking fire season and DIL’s awful experience being pregnant and giving birth during COVID 😐

Wanted 2 and have 2. It took longer than expected and needed fertility treatment so I'm very grateful for them.

Wanted none. Had two. Love them both to bits.

I wanted 3. DH wanted 2 as his 3rd sibling turned put to be twins and he definitely didn't want 4.

4 miscarriages later we had DS who was born with a lot of health issues (some caused by hospital error (and we still don't know years later if the rest are genetic or just a fluke or all due to this error)

Somewhat due to his high needs and partly because I could never "knowingly" bring another baby into the world knowing it would have a lifetime of health issues we stopped at 1.

But we love being a 3, DS does sometimes wish for a sibling but as he's gotten older he realises the age gap is too wide. Plus my tubes are tied now....yayee!

I always wanted 2 close together, boy then girl. Which is exactly what I got (18 months between them). I was happy to stop there. Never really had a hankering for any more after that.