Crap halloween givers

[WashingAt30]

It's nice when someone opens the door to you, and they at least smile, and maybe have a little chat about the DC's costumes. My god, some people don't even look happy, just shove a bag of sweets at you as close the door! I wouldn't be surprised if one creepy man we met was on some kind of offenders register. Why bother if you're not going to get into the spirt?!

If we can't get to the door we usually leave a tub full of sweets outside the door and say "take a handful" (did it this year).

Thinking back to when I was a kid there was nothing worse than a (mean) neighbour with the lights off and no grub.

Well maybe don’t go knocking on doors for sweets and you wouldn’t have to interact with creepy men? I don’t think I’ll ever get on board with this particular Americanism

I thought everyone does that?? Who goes begging at strangers doors?

Everyone here goes to houses that have pumpkins and decorations outside. I don't know where anybody lives, bar one person who doesn't decorate for Halloween anyway, so we wouldn't be able to go if we "just went to people we know". It's hardly begging if you're essentially invited to knock by people who want you to knock. I don't invite the local lady outside Tesco to knock on my door, she actually does beg.

It's not an "americanism".

You must be English. And mean.

To be clear: If you are embracing the whole trick-or-treating thing by handing out sweets at your door, you are expected to be friendly (or spooky!) and welcoming and to chat to the kids and compliment/ask about their costumes and wish everyone a nice evening.

If people don't understand that or don't want to do that... turn off your lights and retreat to the back of your home!

The impression I get is that a lot of fathers are on sweet handing out duties while the mothers take the kids round trick-or-treating. Some are great at interacting with kids but some, including my DH, find the whole thing a bit awkward. My DH's skills lie in formulating spreadsheets, not interacting with the under-10s. I have told him, however, that lack of natural ability or inclination is no excuse and my eldest DC and I spent time in the run-up to Halloween prepping him on bad Halloween jokes to retell to people knocking.

I didn't find that. One dad had clearly had enough but we just joked about how when mine are parents they could dish out olives or sugar cubes. Had a lovely few chats in the village tonight. Lovely community feeling.

Glad you don't love near me OP.
I'm awful at answering the door, I always manage to say something that sounds weird or creepy (in my attempt at chit chat/ complimenting costumes etc) so often I keep it very minimal, but DD loves Halloween decorations so if people can see them they think we want Trick or Treaters. I actually don't though. Sorry not sorry.

The Irish News (from 2014)

https://www.irishtimes.com/culture/ten-trick-or-treating-facts-for-impressive-bonfire-chats-1.1983165

"Scotland and Ireland started tricking: A few decades later a practice called 'guising' was in full swing in Scotland and Ireland. Short for 'disguising', children would go out from door to door dressed in costume and rather than pledging to pray, they would tell a joke, sing a song or perform another sort of "trick" in exchange for food or money. The expression trick or treat has only been used at front doors for the last 10 to 15 years. Before that "Help the Halloween Party" seems to have been the most popular phrase to holler."

"Trick of treat" is just a phrase added on to what we have practiced at Halloween (and exported to North America). That's it. The phrase itself is Canadian (Ontario, the same province where guising is first recorded in North America in 1911).

I find the "well, don't go knocking on people's doors and begging for sweets" folk really odd 🤔.

People are literally waiting there with boxes and bowls of sweets to hand out. They signal this though decorations and pumpkins. If no one comes, they will be disappointed. We're at the end of a close and my DC is always worried that people won't find us to take our sweets.

What exactly is entitled about knocking for sweets in those circumstances?

I said on another thread that the best house I visited tonight was giving out sweets to the kids and wee paper cups of sparkling wine to the adults.

Ooh. I might do that next year. I need something to up the ante 😁

I loved seeing all the costumes- the tinies were just gorgeous and even the awkward teens had put some effort into costumes. It's really not hard to smile and say 'Happy Halloween' or somesuch. Especially when a tiny bat is holding out her arms for a cuddle 🙂

Two solid hours of jumping up and down to answer the door is a bit tiring but it doesn't take much to be pleasant for a couple of minutes at a time.

Mind you- all the children said thank you, and if they were very small their parents reminded them, and also thanked me themselves.

Why bother if you're not going to get into the spirt

Perhaps they know you personally and just want you to fuck off asap.

I don’t think I’ll ever get on board with this particular Americanism

Eh, it's not just American.

"Guising" was a tradition in Scotland and Ireland.

Further back, "souling", and "mumming" were also done here, mumming even being done in the Middle Ages. Even way back with the Celts, during costumes made of animal skins were worn and banquet tables were left out to ward away phantoms. It has a rich history here and has evolved over time.

Why would you do that? You'd go to like...3 houses maybe?

That's just not true though, many many places in the UK have been doing this for decades, if not centuries.

I've been sat here dressed as feckin Winifred Sanderson all evening ready to open the door and be right in the spirit of it and we've only had three. Come and trick or treat here I'll chuck plastic spiders at you and cackle and turn the fog machine on (and give you Maltesers)

I wish I lived in the US sometimes where people really go shitfuck wild for Halloween.

If the people you are visiting have Halloween decorations - and pumpkins etc, why on earth are they being nasty and grumpy? They make it clear that they want to join in. None of this makes sense. I don't get it.

Its (ignorant) English people (who have never done Halloween) thinking they can speak for those of us in Ireland and Scotland who have done for centuries.

The English do Guy Fawkes Night..."penny for the guy", now that's something we have never done.

Totally agree with you, just don't do it if you are going to be unpleasant. One year when my children were around 4 and 8 a neighbour up the road was so ungracious that she totally spoiled the evening and I came home and wrote her a letter advising she doesn't bother next time (put my address and name on it, not anonymous) and posted it right through her door that evening. Children polite, no grabbing sweets or taking more than one etc.

Just don’t do what? Live in a house that has a front door?! Are you seriously telling people off for answering their door and not being overjoyed to hand out sweets to children who knock and demand them with a full on floorshow?

Obviously this isn't what they were doing, but my granny used to go out knocking and asking for money in the week before bonfire night with a rag man "penny for the guy", and then use that money to buy sweets. So it's not necessarily as ridiculous and rude as it first seems.

No, it very much IS as rude as it seems. Telling somebody that the sweets they’re kindly willing to give you on demand aren’t good enough, so they need to give you money for you to go and buy good ones – and that’s not rude???!!!

Not that they were looking for money to buy sweets, nor would they have been happy with a penny, I have no doubt at all. I know some people call trick or treating begging and others tell them off for being an old curmudgeon; but I don’t think you can really describe this kind of behaviour as anything but begging - maybe even with menaces.

Some English folk are annoyed that they have ditched Guy fawkes Night (a (boring) English custom, with an anti catholic foundation) for Halloween (a Celtic custom).

With respect, "penny for the guy" is hardly exciting is it?

My teenage DS was on door duty this evening while I took DD out. It was his first year in charge and he was probably grumpy every time he was distracted from playing on his Switch. I was just happy he didn't eat all the sweets and ignore the door!

Just don’t do what? Live in a house that has a front door?!.

Houses not decorated usually get left alone, or are less likely to be knocked on. You could also just not answer though, I suppose, if people don't pay attention to the lack of decor. I wouldn't answer if I hadn't decorated personally.

Its,a mums net thing where they pre arrange with neighbours to give out sweets in a very boring and organised manner ,something I have only seen on here .

We still.have Bonfire night around where I live .

Im.very nearly 50 and we always did both when I wss a kid I definitely remember dressing up as a witch and carrying a,turnip.lantern ,,we called it bonfire night though not guy fawkes night ( yes im.aware of the gunpowder plot.)