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Original poster

Anyone up? Need to talk please

67 replies

CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 02:16

Hi, not really sure what i want to achieve here but having a relatively new 17 yo driver DS having the police knock the door at nearly 2am is the most sickening feeling in the world.

They wouldn't tell me at first whether he was OK but after many questions they said him/some people have been involved in an incident and they are searching for his car. I called him and he was giving some friends a lift and they asked him to stop at a house and then they got out, then came out and he dropped them home. I called him and he had no clue why I was calling, but I explained that basically armed police were going to get him as apparently an assault with a weapon has taken place somewhere and his vehicle was named.

I am absolutely certain that he has noclue but he was terrified when armed police cuffed him, I was on the phone when he was saying 'ow ow'.

I now have to wait for them to either bring him home or arrest him. Could be hours.

Just need some company I think

OP posts:
Original poster
CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 02:17

I didn't even clock they were armed police at my door as was so worried they were going to say he'd been in an accident.

OP posts:
Floralnomad · 27/10/2023 02:23

At 17 surely you are still allowed to be with them if questioned , I think I’d be tempted to go down to the police station and see if you can get any information .

Original poster
CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 02:24

I did ask and they said its fine they'll bring him home if he's not being arrested, god I'm really naive aren't i.

DH is in bed, he is having an awful time at the moment and didn't want to worry him unnecessarily but maybe I need to get him up as obviously in case they bring him home and no one is up.

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Frintononsea · 27/10/2023 02:25

Oh op I am so sorry.

This is beyond stressful for you..

I am no expert but I have just Googled “what to do when you are arrested” here and it says you must get free legal advice and also that anyone under eighteen must be accompanied by a responsible adult:

https://www.gov.uk/arrested-your-rights

I need to go to sleep now as I need to be up in four hours but I hope very much that all is well with your son.

Being arrested: your rights

The police have to follow strict rules if you're arrested, questioned or charged with a crime - you can get legal advice at a police station

https://www.gov.uk/arrested-your-rights

Original poster
CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 02:27

The officers at the doors spoke to him on the phone and were extremely firm with him and told him to get out the car with the keys and do whatever the officers said as they'd have guns.

He was so upset on the phone that they were shouting at him even, he sounded so confused as to what was happening.

The officer said he was firm with him as wanted him to realise that he needed to do as he was told as they were armed. So then I was panicking that something would accidentally happen to him.

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Floralnomad · 27/10/2023 02:27

I think you should at least tell your husband what’s going on .

Original poster
CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 02:28

Frintononsea · 27/10/2023 02:25

Oh op I am so sorry.

This is beyond stressful for you..

I am no expert but I have just Googled “what to do when you are arrested” here and it says you must get free legal advice and also that anyone under eighteen must be accompanied by a responsible adult:

https://www.gov.uk/arrested-your-rights

I need to go to sleep now as I need to be up in four hours but I hope very much that all is well with your son.

Thank you, unfortunately technically not arrested, just restrained I assume in case he was armed.

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Original poster
CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 02:28

Floralnomad · 27/10/2023 02:27

I think you should at least tell your husband what’s going on .

Yes I'm being ridiculous, I think it's the panic, I am shaking so much as I thought they were there to tell me he was dead.

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Peepshowcreepshow · 27/10/2023 02:30

As pp said, I'd be going to wherever it is they've taken him. He's only 17, I know my DD would be terrified if she were in this position. Tell dh, get ready, charge phone while doing so and make a drink to take in case you have to wait for hours.

Legoroses · 27/10/2023 02:39

My only experience is my brother being wrongfully arrested. I would definitely go to the station. I would insist on legal advice. If he's not arrested, presumably they can't keep him there? So get a duty solicitor or get him home.

GotTired · 27/10/2023 02:41

@CompanyPlease Try to calm down op, this is the first thing, you will not help him if you have panic attack. Read it and focus on those words:

He is alive, he is well and breath.

He is alive, he is well and breath.

He is alive, he is well and breath.

He is alive, he is well and breath.

He is alive, he is well and breath.

He is alive, he is well and breath.

He is alive, he is well and breath.

This will be all explained and over, He is alive, he is well - this is the most important thing to focus. Im sending my hugs. X

Frintononsea · 27/10/2023 02:47

Op (said very gently) again I could be wrong but (said very very gently) think you are being a bit naieve here.

It sounds like your son has been handcuffed. I may be wrong but I think they only do that if they suspect drug offences or if they think someone is armed.

I wouldn’t be letting any seventeen year old of mine be interviewed by police without an adult present. So in your shoes I would be either getting myself to the station and insisting that he has a responsible adult with him, or calling a solicitor (do you have any contacts?) and getting them to meet you there or at least let the solicitor handle it and follow their advice.

At least a quick phone call to the police by a solicitor to check on your son can’t do any harm.

Ir sounds like by giving his friends a lift, your son may have unwittingly or knowingly (sorry), provided a getaway car or helped those with drug offences evade capture.

Frintononsea · 27/10/2023 02:49

I must go to sleep now but I hope all goes well for you and your son.

capabilityfrowns · 27/10/2023 02:50

Custody will arrange an appropriate adult and he will be offered free and independent legal advice if he is arrested. He also has the right to have someone informed of his arrest. It might not be his mum though if he's done something stupid he doesn't want her to know about .

Obviously the car has been involved in something, hence they've traced him to your door

capabilityfrowns · 27/10/2023 02:52

I watched "the met" tonight and same scenario- a woman claiming f to know nothing drove her son and 3 others to commit a murder of a 17 year old with swords and machetes . But of course she knew nothing about it. She didn't even know her son was in the passenger seat apparently, even when shown cctv.

Armed police dont arrest you for nothing . Weapons usually .

Original poster
CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 02:55

He's home. They brought him straight home.

I will update in a minute.

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Original poster
CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 02:56

capabilityfrowns · 27/10/2023 02:52

I watched "the met" tonight and same scenario- a woman claiming f to know nothing drove her son and 3 others to commit a murder of a 17 year old with swords and machetes . But of course she knew nothing about it. She didn't even know her son was in the passenger seat apparently, even when shown cctv.

Armed police dont arrest you for nothing . Weapons usually .

He wasn't arrested. I'm not sure what you're getting at.

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FedUpMumof10YO · 27/10/2023 03:06

If he wasn't arrested then why knock on your door at 2am. I'm confused as I'm sure you are too.

Do you think the Police are covering their back?

Perhaps they've made a mistake, are now aware of his age & came to you before it went wide ?

Original poster
CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 03:08

Frintononsea · 27/10/2023 02:47

Op (said very gently) again I could be wrong but (said very very gently) think you are being a bit naieve here.

It sounds like your son has been handcuffed. I may be wrong but I think they only do that if they suspect drug offences or if they think someone is armed.

I wouldn’t be letting any seventeen year old of mine be interviewed by police without an adult present. So in your shoes I would be either getting myself to the station and insisting that he has a responsible adult with him, or calling a solicitor (do you have any contacts?) and getting them to meet you there or at least let the solicitor handle it and follow their advice.

At least a quick phone call to the police by a solicitor to check on your son can’t do any harm.

Ir sounds like by giving his friends a lift, your son may have unwittingly or knowingly (sorry), provided a getaway car or helped those with drug offences evade capture.

Thanks. Yes they handcuffed him to check he didn't have weapons on him. I tonight I had said the in the OP, sorry, it was probably all quite jumbled. I knew they were doing that and why, the police at my door told me and him that when they spoke to him on the phone before the officers got to him.

They are saying there have been some weapon attacks in the area but told him they have no victims or no suspects other than that his car was seen somewhere. They then told him to go home and said he was lucky as he's the prime suspect in this. We don't know what this is, he doesn't either. He is quite distressed.

He said he told them everything he knew about it. I have told him to not contact his friend at all. Strangely the police didn't mention this to him.

And yes, potentially a unknown getaway driver. I don't believe he knows anything. If he did he wouldn't have lasted 2 mins before telling police.

They have said that he will be now stopped all the time by police in his car.

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Original poster
CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 03:09

FedUpMumof10YO · 27/10/2023 03:06

If he wasn't arrested then why knock on your door at 2am. I'm confused as I'm sure you are too.

Do you think the Police are covering their back?

Perhaps they've made a mistake, are now aware of his age & came to you before it went wide ?

I know, the weird thing is they said they have no victims of attacks either so it makes no sense to me.

They came to the door as they had the registration number of the car and wanted to know where the person driving it was.

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Original poster
CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 03:11

I am glad I spoke to him and also the officer at my door did too as he would have been even more terrified if he hadn't known. When I spoke to him I told him to wait where he was and the police were coming to him, his first response was why are the police coming, I'm fine, I'm just on my way home.

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Frintononsea · 27/10/2023 03:16

They then told him to go home and said he was lucky as he's the prime suspect in this. We don't know what this is, he doesn't either. He is quite distressed.

I’m so glad that your son is home op but sorry he is distressed.

I would still be consulting a solicitor if the words “prime suspect” were mentioned and to help clarify the general confusion. Good luck.

Original poster
CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 03:19

Frintononsea · 27/10/2023 03:16

They then told him to go home and said he was lucky as he's the prime suspect in this. We don't know what this is, he doesn't either. He is quite distressed.

I’m so glad that your son is home op but sorry he is distressed.

I would still be consulting a solicitor if the words “prime suspect” were mentioned and to help clarify the general confusion. Good luck.

I am thinking that perhaps there have been some threats with weapons, so what they are saying is that if anything happens then he will be the person they are going to.

I will be calling someone tomorrow.

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Someoneonlyyouknow · 27/10/2023 03:25

Sleep now for both of you. Or at least bed. In the morning you can get some legal advice and hopefully make more sense of this - it's really hard to take in all the information when you are stressed

Original poster
CompanyPlease · 27/10/2023 03:29

Someoneonlyyouknow · 27/10/2023 03:25

Sleep now for both of you. Or at least bed. In the morning you can get some legal advice and hopefully make more sense of this - it's really hard to take in all the information when you are stressed

Thank you. Yes it's awful not really knowing what is going on, DS is very trusting of people which is very frustrating.

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