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Original poster

Nearly in a serious car accident - hand hold please

719 replies

Usedandhurt · 24/10/2023 16:09

Im literally shaking. Just had a driver nearly kill me and my dc on the motorway. He/she must have not checked before they pulled onto the motorway from a slip road, I literally had to slam on the breaks to avoid crashing into them and thankfully the driver behind me and the one behind them etc etc were able to stop also. My dc would have been very badly hurt - it was a huge bus and I can only imagine the driver got distracted.

Im a nervous driver at the best of times and Im literally sick with nerves.

OP posts:
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8
sunnyseed · 24/10/2023 16:44

TallulahBetty · 24/10/2023 16:11

Depends. How come you didn't move over for them to join?

Well that didn’t take long…🙄

TheHawkisHowling · 24/10/2023 16:44

You've been really lucky. If something had happened, you'd be absolutely delighted to suddenly be in the position you are now where it was just a near miss.

I don't mean to sound harsh in any way. I just mean, look at this from the perspective that this was an incredibly lucky outcome and be grateful for that.

Also, it's not your fault. We can only react as best we can to events on the road. Accidents happen all day every day. It could be any of us on this thread at any moment.

fedupandstuck · 24/10/2023 16:44

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Seriously?? The OP took action, and no accident occurred. Then drove home without incident, and only then had a reaction to the situation. What exactly is wrong with any of that???

MrsWimpy · 24/10/2023 16:44

I do think this was your error. Buses and Lorrie's will expect to join at speed. It's normal for you in the left lane to be aware that there will be joining traffic and slow down or move over.

I understand that maybe you aren't a confident driver but I don't think the bus was at fault here.

EmptyYoghurtPot · 24/10/2023 16:45

Op - don’t try not to cry. It’s one of the ways your body reacts to a shock like this. Cry as much as you need to. If you are worried about the kids hearing you then go have a shower and cry in there. Don’t try to be brave or minimise your feelings

flipent · 24/10/2023 16:45

You should never have to slam your breaks on for traffic joining from the slip road.
Either you move out, which should be done as soon as you're aware of traffic joining from the slip. Or, if you are really not able to move out to make space, you need to slow to make space.

Vehicles on the slip road are trying to get up to speed with the motorway and have to go somewhere. If you saw them trying to join, what action did you take to make that possible for them?

Agree with pp, based on your reaction, I would question if continuing to drive is safe for you and other road users.

Original poster
Usedandhurt · 24/10/2023 16:45

ConfessionsOfAMumDramaQueen · 24/10/2023 16:43

I'm afraid people are right. Its customary to let people merge onto the motorway unless its gridlocked. If free traffic and you see a slip road with vehicles, you check your mirrors and move out to let them on if there is room. If not both should adjust speed to allow safe merging.

It was a large vehicle. They can't stop or speed up as quickly as cars. By not letting them on you put them in a bad spot. Had they stopped they wouldn't have been able to merge and get up to a safe speed again. Always always drive with extra care around larger and heavier vehicles. Their stopping distances are much greater and acceleration much slower.

please read the full thread. The bus came onto the motorway from the slip road, at speed, no pausing. There was no possible way for me to move lanes as 1. I didnt have time and 2. there was traffic in my right lane. ITs a car I drive, not a magic carpet.

OP posts:
Whalewatchers · 24/10/2023 16:45

It's your second chance at life!

That's how I felt after a near miss anyway...

AsWrittenBy · 24/10/2023 16:46

Usedandhurt · 24/10/2023 16:43

A bus, driving at speed, nearly hit my car with my DC in it. What should my reaction be? its a motorway not stock car racing.

Show quote history

It didnt hit you - you posted at 16.09, I would say that it must have happened, what 10 / 15 minutes at the very least before you posted, so say 16:00 then at 16.40 you're sipping water and trying not to cry?

Things like this happen every day, we breathe a sigh of relief that you werent in an accident, and move on.

Thats why I asked if you should be driving

Original poster
Usedandhurt · 24/10/2023 16:48

flipent · 24/10/2023 16:45

You should never have to slam your breaks on for traffic joining from the slip road.
Either you move out, which should be done as soon as you're aware of traffic joining from the slip. Or, if you are really not able to move out to make space, you need to slow to make space.

Vehicles on the slip road are trying to get up to speed with the motorway and have to go somewhere. If you saw them trying to join, what action did you take to make that possible for them?

Agree with pp, based on your reaction, I would question if continuing to drive is safe for you and other road users.

ITs a motorway, if someone moves into a lane in front of you with no notice what do you do?. I have driven for over 20 years with never an issue, no accident,

I can assure you Im a much safer driver than it would appear some posters on here are.

OP posts:
mum11970 · 24/10/2023 16:50

Another one here who thinks you should have seen the bus from way back and adjusted your speed accordingly, if there was no way of pulling out, whether that was by speeding up or slowing down. A bus full of unbelted passengers cannot just pull up to a stop at the bottom of a slip road. You should always be checking slip roads and junctions ahead for traffic. The vehicles behind were probably able to stop because they could see exactly what was going to happen.

HakunaMatiÅ‚da · 24/10/2023 16:50

I can assure you Im a much safer driver than it would appear some posters on here are.

Yet you didn’t anticipate a bus pulling out from a slip road nor slow down in advance to make a gap for it?

flipent · 24/10/2023 16:50

Usedandhurt · 24/10/2023 16:48

ITs a motorway, if someone moves into a lane in front of you with no notice what do you do?. I have driven for over 20 years with never an issue, no accident,

I can assure you Im a much safer driver than it would appear some posters on here are.

Show quote history

How have they moved in front of you with no notice?

You can see the slip road from the carriage way. I'm hoping you saw the bus long before it pulled in front of you. So what action did you take?
Did you just hope the bus would disappear?

Original poster
Usedandhurt · 24/10/2023 16:51

AsWrittenBy · 24/10/2023 16:46

It didnt hit you - you posted at 16.09, I would say that it must have happened, what 10 / 15 minutes at the very least before you posted, so say 16:00 then at 16.40 you're sipping water and trying not to cry?

Things like this happen every day, we breathe a sigh of relief that you werent in an accident, and move on.

Thats why I asked if you should be driving

Show quote history

Actually my DC is very upset and frightened which is upsetting to watch. things like that may happen in your daily life but certainly not mine and since when is there a timeline on upset or anxiety? weird post

OP posts:
OutOfSyncWithReality · 24/10/2023 16:51

HakunaMatiÅ‚da · 24/10/2023 16:50

I can assure you Im a much safer driver than it would appear some posters on here are.

Yet you didn’t anticipate a bus pulling out from a slip road nor slow down in advance to make a gap for it?

This is confusing me also. It didn't just pull out in front of you OP. Slip roads don't work like that.

ConfessionsOfAMumDramaQueen · 24/10/2023 16:51

Usedandhurt · 24/10/2023 16:43

A bus, driving at speed, nearly hit my car with my DC in it. What should my reaction be? its a motorway not stock car racing.

Show quote history

The point is that it was your nervous driving that led to the issue. There is a reason hesitation is included as error on a driving test. If you're too nervous to react and adapt, you are also dangerous.

Citrusandginger · 24/10/2023 16:52

This sounds very scary OP. Can you book a motorway lesson to help with your driving anxiety?

Learning to anticipate better is the best protection for you and your DC. Flowers

fedupandstuck · 24/10/2023 16:52

No one should be slowing down on a motorway to let traffic merge in from a slip road.

The bus driver committed a traffic offence. They must give way to traffic on the motorway. Forcing their way on and making vehicles brake hard to avoid them is the wrong thing to do. Dangerous and not a choice a professional driver should be making.

Hercules12 · 24/10/2023 16:53

Op - you’ve clearly had a shock and a scare. Kindly if this happens again the pp are right, it’s not easy for a large vehicle to get to the right speed or speed up enough from a stop. If you couldn’t go into the next lane then you should slow down to let the bus on. When you saw the bus coming at speed what did you think it would do? It doesn’t matter who was in the right , the key thing is anticipating what is going to happen.
we all make mistakes and I’ve had near misses but you need to pick yourself up and learn from it.

Allthecatsandcosyblankets · 24/10/2023 16:53

This is exactly why I never ask for advice on here, people are foaming at the mouths with excitement to blame the OP no matter what the circumstance. Well done for your quick braking OP and the bus driver is a bell end for joining without slowing down and checking there was room - which there wasng! But thankfully your quick reaction has saved both you and your kids lives.

AsWrittenBy · 24/10/2023 16:53

Usedandhurt · 24/10/2023 16:51

Actually my DC is very upset and frightened which is upsetting to watch. things like that may happen in your daily life but certainly not mine and since when is there a timeline on upset or anxiety? weird post

Show quote history

My post is wierd?

Seriously? If I posted about the times I've had idiots on the road and nothing actually happened, I'd have no time for anything else. Theres 100s of terrible drivers out there, its not an isolated experience

Brahumbug · 24/10/2023 16:53

Jesus wept🙄. Some of the utter bollocks written on this thread. You did nothing wrong OP. It is up to the joining traffic to adjust their speed when joining the motorway. You move over only if it is safe and convenient. Frankly the bus driver should be prosecuted for driving with out due care and attention.

ApolloandDaphne · 24/10/2023 16:54

fedupandstuck · 24/10/2023 16:52

No one should be slowing down on a motorway to let traffic merge in from a slip road.

The bus driver committed a traffic offence. They must give way to traffic on the motorway. Forcing their way on and making vehicles brake hard to avoid them is the wrong thing to do. Dangerous and not a choice a professional driver should be making.

I was just coming to say this. The bus driver was definitely the one in the wrong. Everyone saying otherwise needs a refresher on the highway code.

Original poster
Usedandhurt · 24/10/2023 16:54

Honestly I dont know why I bothered posting here. A person nearly crashes into me and its my issue, As I have said numerous times before I didnt have the opportunity to slow to let the bus join as he was travelling at speed. Im not blind, but neither am I telepathic. He/she was clearly distracted or finishing a shift and trying to get home. Its with the police now and the drivers company so no doubt if I am to blame, as so many pp believe then I will hear about that very soon. I dont believe so though as the very helpful police officer assured me that I wasnt.

OP posts:
JengaCupboard · 24/10/2023 16:54

I drive an awful lot, mainly motorway and cities and stuff like this happens ALL THE TIME... I literally narrowly avoid accidents pretty much every week because people are bloody crazy/incompetent etc.

I have found that moving over on the signposted approach to a junction (i.e. in plenty of time) mitigates this issue as lorries and busses etc rarely stop; they're coming on and that's it - then you're well clear whether there is traffic or not on the slip road - then you just have to content with being cut up by people who didn't anticipate...

Sorry you've had such a shitty day OP, however if you're that nervous it might be worth seeing if there is anything which would help you, CBT course, or just alternative routes...hope you feel better soon x

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