What age of parenting is most expensive?

[Beachwaves127]

Wondering what everyone’s thoughts are on the most expensive parenting age between 0 and 18.

I’m wondering if early years are because we’ll be paying £25k p/a nursery fees per child - although DC’s activities at this age are quite cheap and she doesn’t eat much / clothes are small sizes.

We aren’t doing private schools so struggling to think of an annual cost that will be more than the nursery fees but happy to be told wrong.

Just wondering between 0 and 18 so not considering possible uni fees.

Aware DC’s activities, clothes, food, hobbies will go up as she grows but as above surely not £25k worth of increases?

In terms of actual cash spent, it will be uni for us - I had no idea until recently that we would be expected to top up the maintenance loan so much.

We're finding uni years quite expensive!

Music lessons, exams and instruments from age 4-18 have been a massive expense, but worth it!

11+ tuition, driving lessons and extra clubs, trips etc have been expensive.

Multiple children doing these definitely adds up!

In my life the teenage years ARE more expensive. I will state it as assertively as I want, because it's a fact.

I didn't say the things I quoted were not discretionary, again you're inventing things I haven't said.

But there is no disputing that discretionary spend (ie luxuries) for a teenager cost far more than discretionary luxuries for a small child.

I've never spent £25k per year on DS, even on non-discretionary stuff.

But that's not the question the OP asked.

But there is no disputing that discretionary spend (ie luxuries) for a teenager cost far more than discretionary luxuries for a small child

This. Combined with the fact that really everything is discretionary above the most basic of levels.

By the way, all of you hoping to rely on teens getting jobs to supplement the cost beware.
The job market has changed radically over the last few years. You only have to look at the uni threads to see that part-time jobs are very hard to get for teens/students.
Saturday jobs are virtually a thing of the past.

Saturday jobs are virtually a thing of the past

That’s a really good point. Both my older DC tried to get jobs independently and it was near impossible, it’s all zero hours contracts and many of the online applications terminate unless you explicitly state you’re available all day everyday.

One is now studying overseas and can’t work anyway (even if the course allowed for it, which it doesn’t) and one found work through a contact.

Apart from uni I’d say the biggest expense has been holidays which of course is completely optional. My DH and I didn’t want to miss years of not going on good holidays so we have spent a silly amount on family trips (no regrets though).

0-3 childcare & 17-21 driving and uni

We’ve just got two adult daughters and for an v ave meal out if the bill doesn’t start with a 2 (as in £200+) we think we’re winning, pre kids me and him could go for an early bird Italian, stop for a glass of wine before heading home and spend under £40 those were the days

that was a choice you made and you very well know it

I want to revisit this comment in response to my statement that the uni years were more than £12.5k and the implication that it was my choice to fund at this level.

Many, many families from middle income up will be funding at this level if they have DC at southern unis, where accommodation costs around £8k and living expenses can easily be £500 per month (which is £14k without necessarily including travel home, phones, book, tech etc)

I’m extraordinarily grateful that I do not struggle to fund my DC uni places but I’m also saddened on the uni threads when people have no idea that there were going to be these sorts of costs associated and so far from trying to “put OP down” I’m trying to highlight that there are big costs and being prepared for those is important.

0-4. Minimal nursery fees as I went part time for a few years but the opportunity cost of losing my salary was significant!

Teen is worse than nursery....phones, clothes, tutors to get through exams, more expensive holidays and meals out, more food generally, things like haircuts, make up....then onto driving lessons, insurance etc!

I stayed home with my kids so no childcare costs, but lost income of course.

Uni here is the biggie. For the few years we had 2 in Uni and one in secondary school (private), the school costs alone were $50k pa.

The nursery right by my house is over $2k per month and a nanny would be $5k per month. Glad my kids aren’t small any longer!

Since when do parents pay their kids uni fees? I can understand paying a bit toward accommodation and living costs but I thought loans covered the course fees at least?
I had to pay my way (admittedly in 2004-8 it was quite a bit cheaper) so I might be biased
Is this really the norm?!

I don't pay tuition fees but contributions towards living expenses and rent are still huge.

We have just paid £1,900 for the next few months rent. There are about 5 or 6 of them in a shared house. Landlords are raking it in.

It depends on household income. The more you make, the less the maintenance loan will
be and the more the parents will be expected to contribute. The chart below shows an example breakdown. You are expected to cover more than half out of pocket if your household income is over 62k (it does vary a bit depending on if the student is in London and also if it’s their final year; there’s a more exact calculator here: https://www.savethestudent.org/money/asking-parents-for-money-university.html)

Teens for us ! Holidays are unbelievably expensive . Also clothes , phones, sports , uni fees.....And FOOD !!!! 4 teens boys and a girl. The boys are bottomless pits .

Going out for a meal - 200 euro minimum !

I won't be contributing much to uni for DS as I only earn £22k. He'll have to work part time and he'll get a full loan. It might be that he'll have to stay living at home and go to the local university depending on how rent costs are looking. Local uni is decent anyway (Nottingham).

Least expensive years were when he was 11/12, minimal childcare and didn't cost much in terms of clothes. More expensive now he's 15 but less so than nursery years I'd say.

We paid for our kids university costs (US). The interest rates are really high and many young people are buried under college loans for years (I have friends still paying in their 50s and it’s even worse now).

There was a recent thread here about inheritances, and we decided that we’d try and help our kids on the front end rather than the back end. So they may not ever inherit anything, but they’re well educated and equipped to fend for themselves.

We have 4 so every stage has been expensive! Nursery and then nannies when they were little; clubs, activities and kit at primary school; ditto at secondary - when everything gets grown out of so quickly - particularly shoes/trainers/rugby boots etc. Food for teens, phone contracts, laptops/iPads for school, printer ink (being facetious, but lockdown cost us a fortune in printer paper and ink!), school trips, family holidays....and now we have two at uni concurrently - and will have 3 there for one year.

I guess if you only have a sensible number of children, then nursery and uni years....!

Oh and driving lessons/car purchase/car insurance - which they did contribute to once they were working but public transport isn't great where we are, so the cost of independence for them is high...!

When they get engaged and need a house deposit!

I have two at uni. So now by a mile.
Before that it was the nursery years 0-5. I worked effectively for 'nothing' for over two years (best decision ever long term btw).
Uni accomodation for two now takes more than I earn. Feel like I've come full circle.