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I'm a counsellor-if you were my client, how bad would this be?

117 replies

Counseller · 16/10/2023 19:11

I was talking to a client, video call, from my sitting room. I have an office but often work from the sitting room if I am doing online sessions. I live alone so it isn't a problem

My dog walker brought my dog back early. I didn't expect this, my client wouldn't have even known about it if I was sitting somewhere different but they'd have seen the door open and the walker take the dog's lead off and the dog come in. Dog walker didn't come in-never does after a walk as the lead hangs up right next to the door.

This is a long-term client who is very comfortable with me. I apologised-dog walker didn't do anything other than literally drop the dog off so it was a few seconds at most, I paused the session and I gave her a couple of minutes longer, she did not seem at all bothered about it.

If you were my client, how bad would you think this would be? I am confident they weren't at all perturbed by it but I feel it was so unprofessional! Nothing like this has happened before.

OP posts:
Seagrassbasket · 16/10/2023 19:11

Wouldn’t bother me in the slightest

Dairymilkandtea · 16/10/2023 19:12

Doesn’t sound unprofessional of you at all.

Jesusmaryjosephandtheweedon · 16/10/2023 19:12

I'd be fine with it.

Theyneveraskedme · 16/10/2023 19:13

I wouldn’t even think about it - these things just happen .

Kam610 · 16/10/2023 19:13

I think you're over thinking it. It's not like the dog walker interrupted you and had a chat, taking away attention from your client. If your client knows that you were working from home then things like this can happen. If you were working in an office you could have been disturbed by other co-workers. If she didn't seem fussed about it then I would just forget about it.

PinotPony · 16/10/2023 19:14

I think that's perfectly ok and almost to be expected since we are all using video calling much more now.

DollyDaydream78 · 16/10/2023 19:15

I'd be more interested in seeing your DDog Grin

Wellwellwellwhatsallthisthen · 16/10/2023 19:16

I go to therapy, have had multiple therapists over the years and am also training to be one.

This wouldn't bother me at all! I think I'd quite enjoy the quick glimpse into the therapist's life TBH.

You gave the client extra time, which was considerate, and also apologised. If this was a new client, I'd say maybe address it in the next session, but otherwise I'd forget all about it.

NotFastButFurious · 16/10/2023 19:16

DollyDaydream78 · 16/10/2023 19:15

I'd be more interested in seeing your DDog Grin

Me too!

CapitanSandy · 16/10/2023 19:17

I wouldn’t give it a second thought

SM4713 · 16/10/2023 19:18

Why don't have either a blurred background or a stock standard one which isn't your actual room?

TBH- The client is long term, so knows you well, but if I was a newer client, I'd be thinking 'who else can hear me talking/are there others in the room who can see me etc!' Even though you reassured the client, I would still be thinking its not great.

Ponderingwindow · 16/10/2023 19:18

Not a counselor, but I have had a doctor get interrupted by something personal in the middle of an appointment more than once . Sadly I spend a great deal of time in medical offices so it increases the odds. It has never bothered me at all. Professionals are still people.

what matters is how you handled the interruption, which it sounds like you dealt with it expediently.

MotherEarthisaTerf · 16/10/2023 19:19

I’m a dog person so I would understand and it wouldn’t bother me. I’d be grateful of the extra time if it interrupted my flow of thought - but that would be the same if you had a coughing fit or spilled a drink or something.

WhateverMate · 16/10/2023 19:20

At least you weren't in a spa.

off · 16/10/2023 19:21

Being honest, then in terms of the principle, I would probably feel unimpressed that you hadn't ensured privacy for our session and would consider it a minor lapse of professionalism, yes. Sorry.

But in practice I'm very unlikely to know your dog-walker, and would have been able to stop talking about anything private the moment I saw the door open anyway, so it's less of a confidentiality issue and more that it might throw me off for a little while — push me out of that state of mind that I'm in a safe, private space where I'm able to be open and vulnerable with someone I can trust. And depending on the circumstances, I might take a few sessions to fully regain my previous level of comfort with opening up and being vulnerable.

If it was my first or second session with you, I might find another therapist, but if I'd been seeing you for a while and knew and trusted you, I'd just chalk it up as one of those things that goes wrong sometimes, because everyone fucks up from time to time.

DaftQuestionForToday · 16/10/2023 19:25

Counseller · 16/10/2023 19:11

I was talking to a client, video call, from my sitting room. I have an office but often work from the sitting room if I am doing online sessions. I live alone so it isn't a problem

My dog walker brought my dog back early. I didn't expect this, my client wouldn't have even known about it if I was sitting somewhere different but they'd have seen the door open and the walker take the dog's lead off and the dog come in. Dog walker didn't come in-never does after a walk as the lead hangs up right next to the door.

This is a long-term client who is very comfortable with me. I apologised-dog walker didn't do anything other than literally drop the dog off so it was a few seconds at most, I paused the session and I gave her a couple of minutes longer, she did not seem at all bothered about it.

If you were my client, how bad would you think this would be? I am confident they weren't at all perturbed by it but I feel it was so unprofessional! Nothing like this has happened before.

@Counseller

i wouldn't be in the least bit bothered, in fact, bonus points if I got to see your fog.

your client is an established one who has said she wasn't bothered.

what concerns me more is your attitude/worry about it. As a counsellor I'd expect you to be less thrown by such a non event.

work from where is most comfortable for you!!

ThreeRingCircus · 16/10/2023 19:26

Kam610 · 16/10/2023 19:13

I think you're over thinking it. It's not like the dog walker interrupted you and had a chat, taking away attention from your client. If your client knows that you were working from home then things like this can happen. If you were working in an office you could have been disturbed by other co-workers. If she didn't seem fussed about it then I would just forget about it.

I don't think the issue is that it was an interruption, more that privacy wasn't ensured. It's unlikely that the dog walker would know the client but if I were the client I would then wonder who else was around and could hear me speaking. It sounds like you handled it fine OP but I would blur your background in future and make sure nobody else can see your screen etc.

Counseller · 16/10/2023 19:31

Thank you for all the responses, It's nice to know that most people wouldn't be very bothered by it.

I understand that, @off definitely I feel it was a lapse of professionalism. I've been a counsellor a good number of years and I've never had anything go wrong like this-I've been very lucky as working from home you can get things like people knocking at the door-other counsellors have reported someone just walked into their house, having read the door number wrong, once! Or partners forgetting you're in a session and walking into the room offering a cup of tea etc...
@MotherEarthisaTerf that's true. We're human, I've not had a coughing fit with a personal client but I had one when I worked on a helpline once! Had to keep muting myself and hoping the 'silences' were just me letting them gather their thoughts.

@SM4713 I do always assure clients that I live by myself so there's never anybody about when I work-but I understand your point. Maybe I'll make sure that with new clients at least I am always in my office.

I used to offer house visits and found a lot of people think Its fine to walk in on their Mum/Dad/Spouse/Teenager/whoever in the middle of a session.

I do have an excellent relationship with this client as they're long term and we work together very well. I also know they love dogs-in fact when the dog came in and I apologised all they had to say was 'Awww she's so cute!'
Then we just carried on. It isn't something I could have predicted either.

I understand with confidentiality-I wear noise-cancelling headphones because of things like (and this'd be an issue anywhere I think!) loud noises outside or someone knocking at the door or things like that. And the walker would definitely not have been able to hear anything the client said anyway because of headphones so I'd not say it was a confidentiality issue, more so a professional conduct one.

OP posts:
RosiePeel · 16/10/2023 19:34

It’s not a professional conduct issue op. You wfh. That’s life - don’t worry.

I would be a bit miffed about dog Walker coming home early?

i also wfh and when I have stuff on I always go in my office, close the curtains (light on) and lock the front door just to be sure I can’t be interrupted.

SharonTheHappySquirrel · 16/10/2023 19:35

WhateverMate · 16/10/2023 19:20

At least you weren't in a spa.

But it’s ok, she would have been in a private booth

PeakABoocha · 16/10/2023 19:35

So with the added info that you were using headphones, no I’d have no issue with it.
otherwise, what @off said.

The dog in itself wasn’t an issue at all Imo.
But if this is causing you do much anxiety re how professional it was or wasn’t, maybe you need to take that to supervision?

PeakABoocha · 16/10/2023 19:37

I don’t know if it would help, but I read about someone putting signs on their door/window, either green or red to signal if they could be disturbed or not.
Maybe this could be a good way to signal to your dog walker (or anyone else that comes regularly ish) that you can’t be disturbed?

Atethehalloweenchocs · 16/10/2023 19:40

I think most people would not be bothered and are quite understanding if it is not a recurrent thing and does not take your attention from them. Unless they want to complain about something.

WorriedMillie · 16/10/2023 19:43

I manage a team of counsellors and had a complaint recently about a similar situation (dog interrupting a session)
Some clients would be fine with it, others wouldn’t be. It sounds like this particular client will be ok, but I’d re-visit in the next session in a “wondering how that felt” way.
I think that interruptions like this can be ok (and even useful, if they open stuff up), but they need addressing and re-visiting, tedious as it seems (speaking as someone who, when in therapy as a trainee had to endure an entire session devoted to why the therapist’s doorbell didn’t work and how this made me feel 🤣)

Counseller · 16/10/2023 19:44

Dog walker came back early because the dog got spooked by fireworks. Which is fair enough.

Thanks again-I am not anxious, just wanted to know what most people would feel like in a client's position in this scenario

Sorry yes, I should have specified that I use headphones Smile

OP posts: