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Original poster

Overseas Hen Doo. What’s the Budget?

90 replies

GimmeGin · 09/10/2023 16:50

Been invited to a hen next year. Want to go, but think the budget is a bit mad (£1500) for a 3 or 4 night trip.

what did you spend for flights, villa and a few activities? It’s in Europe so nowhere particularly exotic.

do you think £1500 is excessive? I have a young family, and think i would rather spend that on a family holiday for all four of us.

OP posts:
SecondUsername4me · 09/10/2023 21:12

1500 is roughly our UK break as a family (1k accom and fuel and 500 food and paid entrance one day, lots of free days).

So no, I'd never pay 1500 for a 3day hen.

I'd probably be happy with 350/400 on accom and flights, plus same again for food and drink. Max. And for a very close friend.

Bluesclues1 · 09/10/2023 21:14

I organised one in Malaga and it was £70 for 2 nights in a villa with a pool, then another £250 for all activities, food and drink including wine tasting tour, cocktail master class and paella chef. It also paid for the brides share too.

asked people to book their own flights (which were average £100) so they could choose airport/times and use points if they wanted.

Angelan86 · 09/10/2023 21:19

I organised a hen party for my sister. We went to magaluf mon-fri and we all pitched in for the bride so I think we paid 300-350 each for all inclusive hotel, flights and transfer. All we needed to pay for while we were there was drinks when we went out for the evening and we had breakfast out once or twice. Not a chance would I pay that amount and I think the organiser is really cheeky to expect you all to pay that much! How many are going/meant to be going? What would the price be for all of you added up? £12,000? 😳

crosstalk · 09/10/2023 22:10

This is not the going rate. My DC have been to numerous hens/stags over the last few years, lots of varying incomes. All were in the UK and usually meant hiring a holiday cottage/town house for a long weekend somewhere roughly equidistant and (apart from a couple) cooking in/taking up food/drink. Most around the £300-400 mark, some less. The organisers didn't mind drop outs (it was peak hen for a year) providing it was done right at the beginning - usually fifth hen of the year or childcare.

moderationincludingmoderation · 09/10/2023 22:12

Hate this ridiculous culture of hen dos that span weekends and cost a fortune.
If i was a bride i would be mortified that those expectations were put upon my friends.
A night out in the pub would suffice!

MissBattleaxe · 09/10/2023 22:20

Since when did spaffing eye watering amounts on hen dos become a way of proving your love for a woman some bloke proposed to? It's getting massively out of hand and people are getting shamed into going into debt. They need to calm the fuck down and take the bride down the pub with a net curtain and some L plates on her back.

UsingChangeofName · 09/10/2023 22:24

TheLovleyChebbyMcGee · 09/10/2023 21:09

Speak up, I bet others will follow you as no-one want to be that person, but thats extortionate!!

This.

Seriously, just a breezy "Sorry, that's me out, way out of my price bracket" is better to do now, straight away, before she starts booking things.
I bet you a penny to a pound it will be followed by 90% of the rest of the group agreeing with you.

Cowlover89 · 09/10/2023 22:28

That's too much

SecondUsername4me · 09/10/2023 22:36

I'd put on the chat "sorry I must have missed the conversation about what sort of budget everyone agreed on - certainly I would have declined the invite had I known costs were looking to be this amount, but if the group has decided a 1500pp budget at some point then I'm sure you will all have a very luxurious and enjoyable weeked"

Then just let the others chip in in your favour. Who organises a big group trip without getting some clear basics sorted?

moderationincludingmoderation · 10/10/2023 07:27

Definitely just do a breezy 'sorry way out of my budget, i'm going to have to duck out, have a great time'

Me and 3 friends who are all very close to the bride and her oldesd friends bar the MOH all did this and she and the BM organising ended up actually asking us what budget we could do...

lionsleepstonight · 10/10/2023 08:10

I think it depends on what the £1500 will cover. If it's literally everything, then I think it sounds a realistic budget. Maybe she's trying to state the whole cost upfront and not drip feed e.g. hotel is 200 each, 2 weeks later, flights are 150 each, taxi from airport 50 each etc etc.

I think if thats the 'all in' price, it's realistic. (Note, I'm not saying it's acceptable, but sounds realistic).

Nuca · 10/10/2023 08:16

Definitely wouldn't be paying that, it's a crazy amount for a hen do! Mine was £300 for 3 nights in the UK and even then I felt bad for my friends that my bridesmaid had arranged something that cost that much

Also @ColdEvenings I have spent ages trying to work out what MoO is but can't figure it out?

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 10/10/2023 08:18

I would just put on the chat; that’s way out of my budget so am going to have to drop out. Hope you all have a great time

FiveShelties · 10/10/2023 08:20

waltzingparrot · 09/10/2023 17:24

Makes me yearn for a pizza and a night in a home town bar - £80 tops.

Those were the days😂

One evening is more than enough for a hen do.

PermanentTemporary · 10/10/2023 08:22

Travel costs have rocketed since Covid so I think the MoH is trying to recreate something that might have been £500 five years ago. Also agree with the likelihood that it will end up going way over 1500 if this is the first call.

I wouldn't just drop out, if you'd like to see them. Just say 'this is too much for me, thats my family holiday budget. I don't personally want to spend more than X all in. Could we look at a UK single night deal?' Something like that. Get the conversation going.

Toddlerteaplease · 10/10/2023 08:22

Hell would freeze over before o paid that much!

WhatWillAPearDoAtNight · 10/10/2023 08:28

SecondUsername4me · 09/10/2023 22:36

I'd put on the chat "sorry I must have missed the conversation about what sort of budget everyone agreed on - certainly I would have declined the invite had I known costs were looking to be this amount, but if the group has decided a 1500pp budget at some point then I'm sure you will all have a very luxurious and enjoyable weeked"

Then just let the others chip in in your favour. Who organises a big group trip without getting some clear basics sorted?

I hate all this "sorry I must have missed the part ....." crap, it's so passive aggressive!

Just say sorry you won't be able to attend as it's way over your budget.

Goodornot · 10/10/2023 08:30

Money aside, the resorts mentioned here Magaluf, Malaga, etc why would anyone go there.

£1500 is excessive and not anything I'd pay for 3 days away.

SecondUsername4me · 10/10/2023 08:33

WhatWillAPearDoAtNight · 10/10/2023 08:28

I hate all this "sorry I must have missed the part ....." crap, it's so passive aggressive!

Just say sorry you won't be able to attend as it's way over your budget.

Show quote history

I like a bit of Pass Agg, more so when someone assumes I can drop 1500quid on a 3 day trip.

BarbaraofSeville · 10/10/2023 08:35

GimmeGin · 09/10/2023 17:06

I don’t want to be “that person” pointing out it’s excessive. The core group of girls go on loads of hens so I thought maybe this is the going rate?

There is no 'going rate' but £1500 pp is a lot for a 3/4 night mini break in Europe. Out of the main season that's probably about what it costs both DP and I to go for a week for just about everything (flight, B&B in a hotel, eating out once a day).

It's perfectly possible to spend that amount but it would only be reasonable if everyone was comfortable with that budget as in they could afford to spend it and wanted to. Eg all the hens are childfree professionals who earn good money and enjoy spending it on nice hotels, spas, beach clubs, cocktails etc.

However, if people don't want to spend that much it could be done for far less and still be a lovely holiday.

AutumIsOrange · 10/10/2023 08:39

This is why my Hen would be a meal at a great restaurant. Like, Michelin starred but one night, great food, great company and everyone home in taxis at the end. No games, no gimmicks & male friends would be welcomed too.

ErcolSofa · 10/10/2023 08:52

Goodornot · 10/10/2023 08:30

Money aside, the resorts mentioned here Magaluf, Malaga, etc why would anyone go there.

£1500 is excessive and not anything I'd pay for 3 days away.

Have you ever been to Malaga?
i assume not from the snotty comment
it is a beautiful old town

Angelan86 · 10/10/2023 10:51

Well it would depend on the bride and the people going. We’ve done magaluf a few times and so it was a great place for us to go.

maybe not your cup of tea but it’s full of hen/stag parties so there’s obviously some appeal to it

Angelan86 · 10/10/2023 10:52

@Nuca I have spent ages trying to work out what MoO is but can't figure it out?

maid of honour ❤️

ColdEvenings · 10/10/2023 11:00

Nuca · 10/10/2023 08:16

Definitely wouldn't be paying that, it's a crazy amount for a hen do! Mine was £300 for 3 nights in the UK and even then I felt bad for my friends that my bridesmaid had arranged something that cost that much

Also @ColdEvenings I have spent ages trying to work out what MoO is but can't figure it out?

Omg @nuca!! I'm a Twat! Meant to be maid of honour!! Hahah

MoH

No idea why I decided it was Maid of 'Onour!!