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Original poster

At what age did you start taking your dc to Midnight Mass

53 replies

YoungMacdonaldhadafarm · 08/10/2023 20:43

DC will be 6 this Christmas. We don't really have childcare so haven't been to midnight mass since DC was born. Was wondering if DC is old enough to attend? We'd obviously have to wake DC from sleep for it? If you take your young DC for midnight Mass, at what age did you start please? DH says DC might be bored , but I think with the singing of hyms etc DC won't be. We tried taking DC to Sunday mass when they were 4, didnt want to be there ,said it was boring. We havent tried since.Thought please, Tia xx

OP posts:
NotFastButFurious · 08/10/2023 20:50

I think waking them up to go out is a bit unfair, particularly if they aren’t used to going to daytime church services. Does the church not do an earlier family service?
when you’re a kid you go to bed on Xmas eve and next time you wake up Father Christmas will have been, not to be dragged
tp church and then expected to go back
to bed again 2 hours later!

Theoldcuriosityshop · 08/10/2023 20:50

I started about that age, I just kept her awake though, she'd never have got up for it, loved her bed too much.

Mudflaps · 08/10/2023 20:51

I'd start taking them to mass now, not every week but maybe twice a month so they know what to expect, let them bring a book to read if necessary. My dc is 31 now but was well used of mass by age 6, first communion was age 7 back then so it was important for them to be prepared but it was also a time for meeting friends and family so it was enjoyable. The Christmas midnight mass is usually really special but can be long so I'd want to be sure they can sit quietly for it so I could relax and enjoy it so practice before by going a few times. Make it a fun time, if not meeting friends maybe plan something to do straight after mass but I would think 6 is plenty old enough to go.

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SlipperyLizard · 08/10/2023 20:52

My mum took us one year (no idea why, we weren’t religious), can’t recall how old we were but late primary I think. She’d really bigged it up but it was so boring - why do you think a 6 year old would enjoy it?

switswoo81 · 08/10/2023 20:54

We swopped from midnight Mass to Christmas morning Mass when dc came along. I loved midnight Mass previously but I really like the new ritual of getting all dressed up and going to Mass and seeing people on Christmas morning .

AllTheChaos · 08/10/2023 20:55

Maybe an earlier carol service would be more appropriate? That’s what I do with DD. I am hoping to take her to midnight mass this year, but she will be nearly ten. She’s started to show an interest in coming to church with me sometimes, but I haven’t put any pressure on, just explained my reasons for wanting go, and why I’d like to share that with her. We’ve agrees that she will come once a month, and we’ll increase that if she enjoys coming.

EmmaPaella · 08/10/2023 20:56

I went to midnight mass from being very young, maybe three. We fell asleep but there was orange squash and biscuits afterwards!

Bearonthestair · 08/10/2023 20:58

I grew up in a religious household. We did not get the option of midnight mass till we were in out teens. Why on earth would you make a small child stay up that late, potentially ruining their Christmas Day? Small children belong in bed at midnight.

CordeliaNaismithVorkosigan · 08/10/2023 21:03

We took DD to church weekly from when she was a fortnight old. First midnight Mass was when she was 10, and we just let her stay up. Now13, she’s agitating to be allowed to stay up all night for the next general election! (She still comes to church but she may have a period of not going- if so I hope she’ll come back to it as an adult.)

legalseagull · 08/10/2023 21:04

Too young. Tired and bored would make for a nightmare combination. Isn't there a children's service earlier on Christmas Eve?

Rudolphthefrog · 08/10/2023 21:06

Mine are 10 and 7. They go to church regularly, I take them to a Christmas Eve carol service and sometimes the Christmas morning one too, but I’d never dream of waking them for Midnight Mass. It takes long enough to get them to sleep the first time on Christmas Eve, no way am I doing it again at gone 1am! Plus I don’t need them anymore tired or wound up than they already would be on Christmas Day. I’ll take them once they’re old enough they can just stay up that late.

I’d start your son with an ordinary daytime service and see how they do.

NumberFortyNorhamGardens · 08/10/2023 21:17

My DF’s family was Polish, and Wigilia (the Christmas Eve meal) followed by present-opening, followed by Midnight Mass, was the highlight of the year. I can’t remember how old I was, probably six or seven, but I do remember us driving through 1970s London to my DGPs in West Hampstead every Christmas Eve. At that age, staying up was a rare treat. I wasn’t fussed about the food, which was an acquired taste (those aware of it will know what I mean!) but I adored the present ritual, the Christmas tree and the carols at Midnight Mass.

And of course, we had Father Christmas and Christmas Day lunch as well.😁

I suppose it depends on your kids. Mine were never into Midnight Mass or Christmas carols. But I’d say about seven is the age you’d expect them to appreciate it, if it’s been part of the family tradition.

Morred · 08/10/2023 21:20

It sounds as though you’re Catholic and I don’t think the service is usual in Catholic Churches, but lots of Anglican churches have Christingle services on Christmas Eve. These are child friendly (or in many cases, explicitly for children). Or does your church have a crib service?

I wouldn’t take a child that young to the midnight, but my husband and I tend to alternate years so one of us goes and the other stays at home and sorts the mince pie/carrot/sherry!

Photographsandmemories · 08/10/2023 21:21

I can't stand people dragging little kids to them.

Jaime321 · 08/10/2023 22:48

I've been taking mine since they were 4&5 but they are very used to church, Dad is a priest and I'm an ordinand. They love the excitement of going to church in pj's! I've had more problems keeping them awake for earlier services than midnight mass, they still get up for Christmas day service too.

EmmaPaella · 08/10/2023 23:04

NumberFortyNorhamGardens · 08/10/2023 21:17

My DF’s family was Polish, and Wigilia (the Christmas Eve meal) followed by present-opening, followed by Midnight Mass, was the highlight of the year. I can’t remember how old I was, probably six or seven, but I do remember us driving through 1970s London to my DGPs in West Hampstead every Christmas Eve. At that age, staying up was a rare treat. I wasn’t fussed about the food, which was an acquired taste (those aware of it will know what I mean!) but I adored the present ritual, the Christmas tree and the carols at Midnight Mass.

And of course, we had Father Christmas and Christmas Day lunch as well.😁

I suppose it depends on your kids. Mine were never into Midnight Mass or Christmas carols. But I’d say about seven is the age you’d expect them to appreciate it, if it’s been part of the family tradition.

I had similar Christmas Eves and they were magical. Lovely memories, midnight mass included. Christmas Day wasn’t ruined, we did all that too.

That said, I was always too knackered to take my own kids!

UsingChangeofName · 08/10/2023 23:26

Mine started coming to the midnight service at Christmas from when they were teens. Or the youngest might have been about 12 (?). But they were used to coming to Church every week since they were babies.
I'd been several times before that though, with dh staying at home and looking after them.

HairHeGoesHairHeGoesAgain · 09/10/2023 00:24

Mine's 6 and I definitely wouldn't wake him for midnight mass. He'd still be up till the crack of dawn and then be hideous on Christmas day.

We do the afternoon crib service. DH usually does midnight mass solo. I do love being in church on Christmas Eve night, before all the congregation turn up and it's peaceful and still with the candles lit.

BungleandGeorge · 09/10/2023 00:35

I’m confused about why you’d wake your child up for midnight mass when they don’t attend Church at all usually. Do you attend? Does your child go to Sunday school instead. I’ve always got the impression midnight mass is mainly attended by drunk adults who are not church goers usually. Aren’t there services for families on Christmas Eve/ day you could attend?

Tighginn · 09/10/2023 02:39

Wait until they are old enough to make their own religious choices.

Ragwort · 09/10/2023 02:46

I wouldn't take a DC to such a late service (& my DC did come with me to morning services). If you want to go to Midnight Mass what's stopping you from going on your own & DH stays behind with your DS? I always attend Midnight Mass on my own.

ChipsAreLife · 09/10/2023 03:57

We didn't go until teens. I used to love midnight mass but we find another service now we have kids (oldest 8, youngest 3) mine are awful on a bad night of sleep so it would ruin Christmas Day for us a bit.

Lizzieregina · 09/10/2023 04:10

We never brought our kids to midnight mass. Our church offered a children’s mass at 4pm with the kids choir, bell ringers and a live nativity, so we did that.

We always had our big family party on Christmas Eve after mass.

I definitely wouldn’t have ever woken small sleeping children to go to mass.

HoppingPavlova · 09/10/2023 04:16

When you don’t need to wake them up, and they want to go?

mathanxiety · 09/10/2023 04:18

If there's a children's Mass earlier in the evening, I'd do that instead.

I'd also try bringing your child to Mass more frequently. Parishes sometimes have a 'family Mass' or a children's scripture session.

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