Need help…kids (5 and 3) won’t go to sleep until late, and won’t go to sleep unless we sit with them in the same room

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My two girls (5 and 3) share a bedroom (at their request). We do have the space for them to have their own separate bedrooms.

They are both shocking at going to sleep and I’m at the end of my levels of patience. Even if I put them to bed early, they won’t go to sleep until gone 9pm. They still aren’t asleep now. And they insist that either me or DH stays in the room with them until they go to sleep. Our evenings are being eaten up by this, DH and I have no time together.

We have tried incentives. We have tried leaving them, closing the door, explaining that we will be in the next room to them, and going back in every few minutes to try and re-settle the screaming. Nothing has worked. We do days full of physical activities and they still aren’t tired in the evenings. I’ve even tried magnesium supplements.

I’m really hoping someone has been through this and has the answer?!

How long do they take to fall asleep if you sit with them?
Do they wake during the night?

Have you tried story apps like the Tonie (?) box or the Moshi app? That's what resolved a similar situation for us.

Separate rooms might be the answer as they may play off each other when one is crying etc it might set the other off. The risk with separate rooms is they both might still ask you to sit with them and you can't split yourself in two.

Try the Moshi App.

I second the Moshi app and own rooms or one in your bed until they fall asleep then move into the room together whilst asleep if you don’t have space for a room each.