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Original poster

Waitrose age ID check is bugging me

381 replies

Mothership4two · 14/09/2023 05:43

I was is a smallish busy Waitrose (not my usual shop) with DS (25) and I bought 6 bottles of (not cheap) wine, a box of chocolates and a handful of day to day food items. At the till I put the items on the belt and bagged them while DS stood waiting by the end. The cashier didn't put the wine through and asked my son for ID. I was a bit confused and told her that this was MY shopping (I'm in my 50s and sadly do not need ID). She ignored me and asked for his ID again. When I repeated it was my shopping she said it was company policy - other than that she was pretty uncommunicative. So DS went out to the car to fetch his ID and there was a bit of grumbling from the couple waiting behind who then went off to find another till. DS came back and she put it through without a word.

I wasn't grumpy with her, I was just neutral, paid and left. It was irritating but we weren't particularly outraged and had a laugh about it in the car. DS said he hasn't been asked for ID in years (he looks his age) and that no "youngster" would be spending £70+ on wine for a party. We thought it was odd though.

I know there are much bigger things going on in the World to worry about, but it has bugged me since then. I know the cashier isn't a mindreader but it was pretty obvious it was my shopping and very obvious that DS is an adult. And also what happens if you go around with your 16 year old child or younger and happen to buy alcohol, would Waitrose then refuse to let you buy it? I'm sure that happens in supermarkets up and down the country all the time - buying alcohol when parents are shopping with their children. I understand that supermarkets have to have a policy for not selling alcohol to childen via others but it was patently obvious that was not happening. The whole thing doesn't make sense.

AIBU and has anyone else been put in a similar postion?

OP posts:
Jimmyneutronsforehead · 14/09/2023 12:58

PerspiringElizabeth · 14/09/2023 06:32

YANBU. I have an 8 year old and if I was buying alcohol with him in tow they would obviously assume it’s for me. It would be preposterous to not sell to me as I have offspring in tow. So in 5/10 years time they’re suddenly going to assume it’s not for me then?? 🙄 very irritating OP.

Exactly. And let's face it if it was some super covert mission to supply alcohol to minors, you wouldn't have them waiting at the end of the till ready to pass it over to them would you.

It's not exactly a hard obstacle for those people to genuinely overcome.

The silliness of it all is just baffling.

StopEatinNutellaOutOfTheJar · 14/09/2023 13:06

This happened to me at Morrisons recently when I popped in on a Saturday night to grab some pizza and bits for dinner and snacks for the evening. Grabbed DP a 4 pack of beers and had my teenage son with me. They point blank refused to sell me the alcohol because he was underage.

So I declined the whole load of shopping at the till and left- went to Tesco, left DS in the car and bought exactly the same shopping from there. What a waste of everyone's time!

Its silly IMO ID'ing a kid who is clearly shopping with their parent.

ActDottie · 14/09/2023 13:11

Unless there is obvious evidence that the alcohol is intended for someone under age I really think shops need to stop doing this.

GingerIsBest · 14/09/2023 13:32

Oh my word, this sort of policy infuriates me. It's so irrational and stupid.

But I'm quite pleased I've read this thread because if it ever happens to me (DC are preteens but DS is very tall and I suspect we'll start getting people assuming he's 14 or older pretty soon) I now know that I will just walk away and refuse to pay for anything, leaving my shopping behind. That might make me seem petty and like I'm taking it out on the cashier, but ridiculous policies are not getting my support from me.

AffIt · 14/09/2023 13:33

It's a ridiculous policy (and I say that as somebody who has spent a lot of time working behind bars and in the wine industry, so I know the law).

If proxy selling is such an enormous problem, then shops need to clearly advise in advance (so that you can leave your teenager in the car or at the exit) and apply a blanket policy (similar to the US) by which if you are buying an age-restricted policy - be it alcohol, cigarettes, knives, butane, scratch cards or whatever - then you will be asked for ID no matter what your apparent age.

Pandor · 14/09/2023 13:34

The proxy sale situation seems even more ridiculous when you consider that in England, Scotland and Wales it is legal for children over the age of 5 to drink alcohol at home or on other private premises.

So as an adult with a younger teenage child with you in a supermarket, that bottle of wine you are buying could well be shared with them at once you get home and neither you nor they would be breaking the law if that were to happen.

However, that position is muddied when the law says that you can’t actually buy the wine on their behalf - so I guess you can’t intend to share it with them when you are buying it, that idea has to spontaneously occur to you once you are safely out of the shop.

Clear as mud.

PickoftheMix · 14/09/2023 14:05

GingerIsBest · 14/09/2023 13:32

Oh my word, this sort of policy infuriates me. It's so irrational and stupid.

But I'm quite pleased I've read this thread because if it ever happens to me (DC are preteens but DS is very tall and I suspect we'll start getting people assuming he's 14 or older pretty soon) I now know that I will just walk away and refuse to pay for anything, leaving my shopping behind. That might make me seem petty and like I'm taking it out on the cashier, but ridiculous policies are not getting my support from me.

I think I would do the same.

The more people who refuse to accept this nonsense "rule" the better, then maybe shops will start to review their policy when they start losing whole trollies' worth of food sales.

I'd be interested to see the statistics as to whether these "rules" have actually lowered underage drinking at all over the past decade? Teens will get booze if they want it no matter what, and the least likely way they will do it is by standing next to their parent in the queue whilst it's going through the checkout...

DemBonesDemBones · 14/09/2023 14:06

@GingerIsBest @PickoftheMix you know who'd have to put your shop back, right? Clue: not the people making the rules.

PickoftheMix · 14/09/2023 14:08

DemBonesDemBones · 14/09/2023 14:06

@GingerIsBest @PickoftheMix you know who'd have to put your shop back, right? Clue: not the people making the rules.

No, but if the shop was loosing enough sales they might just take notice.

DemBonesDemBones · 14/09/2023 14:09

@PickoftheMix I really doubt your one woman protest would make them change their policy. It wouldn't even make it back to Head Office. You'd just make the cashier feel utterly shit.

Frumpylumpyvixen · 14/09/2023 14:10

I haven't read the full thread but what you described is not the law, not is it Waitrose company policy, I've checked with them before, in the OP if it happened as described then the cashier applied the policies incorrectly.

Lots of the early replies I read where based on opinion or old guidance.

GingerIsBest · 14/09/2023 14:10

DemBonesDemBones · 14/09/2023 14:06

@GingerIsBest @PickoftheMix you know who'd have to put your shop back, right? Clue: not the people making the rules.

Sure. But they'll be doing it during their working hours and shelving/packing/handling customer issues is part of their job so I'm not feeling like I'm doing something super mean - it's not like I'm planning to piss on the trolley before I walk away, leaving them to clean it up.

But stores won't change these sorts of rules if it isn't painful for them to keep making them.

So along with the loss of business, they'll lose the productivity of the person who is now going to have to put things away. wouldn't even surprise me if in bigger supermarkets, the fresh/refridgerated stuff has to be tossed as they won't be able to guarantee that it has only been out of the fridge for a set amount of time.

PickoftheMix · 14/09/2023 14:12

DemBonesDemBones · 14/09/2023 14:09

@PickoftheMix I really doubt your one woman protest would make them change their policy. It wouldn't even make it back to Head Office. You'd just make the cashier feel utterly shit.

I said if enough people started to do it...

I might look into these policies and whether there is actually any data to prove they have decreased underage drinking or not?

DemBonesDemBones · 14/09/2023 14:14

@GingerIsBest No, if they're serving you, their job is serving you. So you're taking people off tills. And who do you think gets the abuse when there aren't enough tills open?

GingerIsBest · 14/09/2023 14:18

DemBonesDemBones · 14/09/2023 14:14

@GingerIsBest No, if they're serving you, their job is serving you. So you're taking people off tills. And who do you think gets the abuse when there aren't enough tills open?

There are staff for shelf packing and staff for tills and often they are the same people, sure. But that's really not my problem.

I'm really quite tired of this theory that we should all bend over ourselves backwards in case we inconvenience someone for 10 seconds, particularly if that person is someone in a lower paid role.

For a start, based on this thread, it's pretty clear that in many cases these policies are being misunderstood by the cashier themselves - as per comments higher up on this thread. At the end of the day, the blame is with the corporate - they need better policies, and better training on those policies. And if that means someone has to spend 10 minutes putting my shopping away as part of my protest over ridiculous policies, so be it and the staff should take it up with their employees.

OtterAnimagus · 14/09/2023 14:19

Its nowhere near as easy to lose a license or get a fine as all of thesespeople are making out. We have just had first hand experience in work, police concern so local licensing involved. No fines no license removal.

DemBonesDemBones · 14/09/2023 14:20

@GingerIsBest you're talking nonsense, they are not the same people. And if you think it takes 10 minutes to put a trolley of shopping back...🤦‍♀️
I think you should treat everyone with respect and kindness, lower paid or not.
You're picking a fight with the wrong people and it wont get you far.

JohnFinlaysNewTeeth · 14/09/2023 14:32

I would be willing to bet the majority of those crying about not being served alcohol while with their 17 year old would hit the fucking roof of the same store had served said 17 year old.

Don’t be a dick to retail staff, they’re doing thier job. If you don’t like it protest to RASG or whoever is responsible for challenge 25, Becky behind the till in Tesco can do fuck all about it.

Pawpawpatrol · 14/09/2023 14:38

When I was 18 my dad had to put a box of chocolate liqueurs, which we were buying as a leaving gift for my sixth form teacher, back on the shelf because I was with him and couldn't provide ID (at Waitrose). Chocolate liqueurs!

Scylax · 14/09/2023 15:02

I don’t blame her but I think the policy itself is ridiculous

GingerIsBest · 14/09/2023 15:09

DemBonesDemBones · 14/09/2023 14:20

@GingerIsBest you're talking nonsense, they are not the same people. And if you think it takes 10 minutes to put a trolley of shopping back...🤦‍♀️
I think you should treat everyone with respect and kindness, lower paid or not.
You're picking a fight with the wrong people and it wont get you far.

I'm not going to be rude or shout at them. But it's a ridiculous policy and me writing to a store (which I would also do, by the way) is unlikely to change things.

And no, I won't be going ballistic if someone serves my son alcohol when he's 17. I'd prefer they don't, but he lies and convinces someone he can be served, he's to blame, not them.

LumpyandBumps · 14/09/2023 15:22

I was refused an energy drink because my 21YO son was with me in Morrisons.
I was the one putting the shopping through the self checkout.
The member of staff didn’t even look at me, just asked my son for ID. He didn’t have anything with him, and although she hadn’t asked the drink was actually for him, so he went to change it for Coke.
She said he was at that awkward stage where they didn’t age!
My son was fine about it, just muttered about it happening to him before ( meaning the challenge 25 policy for alcohol- not needing to be 16 for an energy drink), and she was a bit snippy, saying ‘I don’t know why he doesn’t carry something with him if it always happens’
which I found quite impertinent and rude as he’d already readily agreed to go and change it for something else.
I thought it ridiculous that she thought my bearded 21 YO was under 16, and her attitude was poor, but I just paid for my goods and left.
I haven’t been back there since though. The staff in the local Tesco are much more pleasant.

Heyahun · 14/09/2023 15:27

so can i not buy alcohol if i have my 2 year old with me in her buggy then if shes underage- in case im buying it for her? is this the actual law?

Dorksdirectdotcom · 14/09/2023 15:32

It's the law
She could have acknowledged you nicely though! Manners cost naff all 😊

slashlover · 14/09/2023 15:36

EdithStourton · 14/09/2023 08:21

I've had similar in the local co-op. DD, then aged about 20, had no ID, so I said I'd put her bottle of wine through with my shopping. But it's for her, said the cashier and refused to ring it up.

I could see her point, but it was bloody annoying.

That's the definition of a proxy sale.