Slim women. Do you work at it?

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I always thought slim women could just eat whatever they liked naturally. But looking at the eating habits of my slim friends, they don’t seem to eat whatever they like - they are constantly making healthy, low cal choices and I can’t shake the feeling it’s deliberate in order to stay slim, rather than them just actually fancying the lower cal option.

is this your experience? Is this what slim women have to do forever? When did you start doing this and do you find it easier now?

No not really. I naturally have a small appetite and I get full very quickly. I'm also quite tall and have a small frame so I carry a lot more weight than is immediately apparent but I still appear "slim".

I also don't much like sweet things so I can happily pass on the cakes and chocolate but a bowl of anything savoury like crisps or peanuts left beside me will get emptied very quickly.

Mid 40's, 1.70 cms tall, 56 kg. Have been very slim always. Half Spanish, I've been on a Mediterranean diet all my life. Haven't eaten meat in 30 yrs (fish is fine). I eat 3 full meals a day of high protein diet. No junk food. Never had kids. I don't have a car and walk every where. I swim for one hour in my health club every night before going to bed. I don't do any sacrifices whatsoever, I eat all I want, but If you make me choose between a pizza or an organic salad I'll always choose the latter. I hate cake, ice cream, processed food, take aways and industrial bakery of any kind. I eat A LOT, but only organic and lean protein I cook myself. I believe keeps me very slim is a convo of diet, life style and genes.

@DragonScreeches thank you ❤️❤️❤️

It’s simply not true to say slim = restriction and control. It’s a tired trope. Severely restricting calories is a really provocative thing to say. Presume you’re projecting your own insecurities.
I have never severely restricted my calorie intake. I don’t count calories (never have). have never dieted.

Honestly no. I think everyone has a different baseline body shape and weight naturally and some women are just naturally larger than others. Of course some women go to extremes to stay thin, but the whole "all slim women work hard for it" is just a comforting myth larger people tell themselves.

I've been 8 stone and a size 6 (at 5'5) my whole life without ever paying any attention to what I ate, eating chocolate every day, bread every day, pizza, doughnuts, takeaways, big almond croissants and danishes a few times a week.

However I do exercise a reasonably amount (swimming and dance classes every week, and long walks) and am generally a very fidgety person who can't sit or stand still.

I think my portion sizes are naturally much smaller than perhaps other people, just because I don't want massive portions. I'll eat chocolate every day but probably only a small chocolate bar, or a handful out of a grab bag of buttons of something. I couldn't eat a whole multipack or a whole pack of biscuits, I'd feel sick. I have two friends who are obese and I've noticed they don't eat as much junk or sweet food as me (at least not that I'm aware of) but the portions they serve for meals are twice the size of what I'd consider a normal dinner serving, and they also seem to eat super fast, whereas I'm a very slow eater.

I think it's hard for most women to be very lean, ie below a certain percentage of body fat, and pretty much everyone would have to eat and exercise carefully (not necessarily low calories, bur a very clean diet) to have clear muscle definition on stomach, arms etc.

I'm quite slim (5'9'', 9 stone) but whenever I join a gym and get weighed on one of those body fat machines I'm have a high body fat %. My arms are not toned and my stomach looks flat but has no definition at all. I can look like this and eat more or less what I want. I also drink a lot of calorific drinks, juices, soda, beer, wine etc. But I hardly ever feel hungry, maybe only once or twice a week. If I exercise a lot then I start to feel hungry all the time and think about food a lot more.

I'm 5'2" and 7.5st so am slim but it's not something I work at. I wouldn't call myself healthy though. I don't exercise, eat fast food about twice a week, and spend the rest of the time eating Asian food (I'm East Asian) which ranges from healthy to as good as fast food.

Here's what I had today for example (I'd consider this a typical day in terms of food):

Breakfast:
Leftover kimchi fried rice from last night's dinner
Ocha

Lunch:
8x nigiri

Matcha latte

Teabreak:
Toast with butter
Iced latte
2x soft boiled eggs

Dinner:
Beef bowl (so rice, molten egg, sliced beef, and some yakiniku sauce)
Ocha

I’m slim, a classic ectomorph from a line of classic ectomorphs. My weight has been consistent through my late teens, twenties, and thirties. I don’t ‘work at it’, but from being a child my diet has always been high fat/protein and low carb - cultural influence, as opposed to a mindful ‘must watch weight’ restriction though. I don’t have a big appetite, I rarely get cravings, and food isn’t something I’ve ever had a complex relationship with, or spend a lot of time thinking about. If I’m hungry I eat, and when I’m full I stop. I also have an active lifestyle. These things are normal and natural to me, so I don’t consider them to be effort on my part.

DD was incredibly slim until her forties. She could eat what she wanted and had a very sweet tooth. All that has changed with an early menopause and she now has to watch what she eats.

@MissGroves
I'm conscious that I'm only size 8-10 today because of vanity sizing.

Under the age of 35- easy peasy to remain slim. I was naturally slim, ate pretty much what I wanted, and if I wanted to drop a couple of pounds for a wedding/night out, I would eat Weetabix for two days and it would be gone.

Over the age of 35 (and second child), absolutely impossible to remain slim without eating very restricted diet. Not just the perimenopause, take medications that don't help. Just clings to me now. If I wanted to drop a couple of pounds it would take vigorous exercise and calorie control for 2/3 weeks and even then it would probably go back on within seconds once I had a nice meal out.

Just not the same experience!

It's a dangerous trope too because some people will no doubt believe it without even thinking.

Size 8-10. I do at least an hour of vigorous exercise every day (and I mean every day, Christmas, holidays, when I’m away with work) allows me to give into my sweet tooth more often than I should. Outside that I generally opt for the lowest calorie option at restaurants, rarely have more than one drink, even on a night out. There’s definitely significant sacrifice involved.

In terms of effort, I've thought of two other things, which is that I didn't have to try to lose any baby weight. I actually ended up losing far too much weight from breastfeeding, to the point I became unwell with malnutrition.

And the other is making an effort not to put on weight as you get older. I'm thinner at 40 than I was at 30. And I was thinner at 30 than I'd been at 20. And actually same again when I was 15. I was my biggest 'adult' size at 15.

I may have the dreaded shrinks, come to think of it.

In my 20s I was very slim. I ate plenty at work. But I lived on my own and couldn’t be bothered to cook, ever, and also used to get home from work very late, so ate very little in the evenings, I also didn’t drink when home alone (although drank plenty at weekends - but also danced it off).

Looking back I ate unhealthily, but also calorie-wise it’s what I’d eat now if I’m on a diet. It just wasn’t on purpose. Nowadays I have a DH who cooks and stocks the cupboards. Plus I’m no longer in my 20s.

I am a size 8 at 41, have always been slim, I don't watch what I eat but I take time with my food, I don't rush it and stop when I'm full, I eat what I want, my 2 sisters and dad are the same so it's not just me. I have been told since my 20's it will catch up with me, for some people it's just down to genetics

I am slim at 5ft 8 and a size 8 to 10 and I eat quite a lot.
I like healthy food and unhealthy food but I rarely drink alcohol.
Im in my 40s. I have a sweet tooth but I’m very active and a lone parent. Constantly on my feet and walk everywhere generally.
Never done any faddy diets and eat three meals a day. I only snack when my stomach rumbles.
I think I’m slim due to genetics and being active.

This! In the real world, anyone from a size 12 is considered slim. Plus the pp actually bragging that her daughter apparently looks"sensational" at a size 4 - 6! My god, the poor girl probably looks ill.

According to BMI I am slim. However, I don't have to cater for others or constantly have to think about food hence, eat when I'm hungry.

I wear a 6 and I definitely don't look ill, or even especially skinny.

but I only eat salad and never eat cake, yet I'm fat. Is it really that simple?

I think it's both.
In my 20s/30s, I ate whatever I wanted, drank and partied too much, was naturally slim & never thought about it.

Late 30s, thought "I'm going to have this body until I'm 80+, better look after it". That meant more conscious choices for exercise and good nutrition, but not in a joyless way, it's a positive. I love food, it's one of the joys of life! It's much more about being healthy, active and able to enjoy all my sports and activities rather than just "slim".

I eat whatever I like, will happily do 3 courses and wine at a nice restaurant, or cake/dessert etc, but also have the awareness that if I over-indulge one day, the healthy and sustainable choice is to eat less & nutritionally better the next day.

It helps that I do enjoy fruit and veg more than carbs and junk food, so choosing what I want is usually also choosing the healthy option - and also, I believe that as I improved my diet, my gut microbiome also changed in response (over several months), so that it reinforces and supports those choices - tuning in and listening to my body, I'm more aware of what my body actually wants to power and feed it, and that's usually a healthy choice, not junk. Any desire for carbs/sweets/junk etc has certainly diminished massively.

Plus, I've never been much of an emotional eater, but I learnt to recognise those cues when it does happen, and do something else (for me, go dancing, climbing, or cold swimming), if what I'm feeling isn't really hunger, but misplaced emotions.

sorry, that quote was at @BumbleNova

I was overweight as a child and teen (not fun growing up in the 80’s/90’s) and have been slim since 18 (5ft 9 1/2” and size 8-10).

For me, it’s 100% food choices. On some days I eat a lot but it’s all high density/low calorie choices like salad, lean protein & minimal carbs.

The big difference I’ve noticed from being slim v being fat is that when I was fat I restricted my food in public and overate/binged when alone. Now I’ll have a pudding when out with people and then skip meals when I’m on my own.

In my 20’s and 30’s, I felt alone at having to constantly work at being slim. Now I’m in my 40’s, I feel most women my age are either restrictive with food or slightly heavier. I think both are equally legitimate choices - with pluses and minuses to each.

Im quite an anxious personality type and being restrictive with food is a control mechanism. For me personally I think food restricting and overeating are two sides of the same emotional-eating coin in that they’re both coping mechanisms. In an ideal world, I’d rather have a healthier relationship with food and be a size 12 and higher up my healthy bmi range - but I haven’t figured the secret out yet!

I’m a size 8-10 ( in an ideal world a size 9) but I don’t diet or work at it I just eat a normal balanced diet full of proteins, veg, carbs, fats and dairy etc, I just stop eating when I’m full and don’t sit there pigging out on junk food when I don’t want to.

I just use common sense to understand about what is and isn’t going to be good for me. I have a sweet tooth and do eat cakes and sweets but I do it in moderation. If you know what a healthy lifestyle should be then it’s not difficult to make those choices.