Do children's birthdays need a 'main' present?

[bapplebanana]

My DS turns 6 soon, and we've bought him a few books, at atlas game, some new Lego, uno extreme, a board game, slime ingredients, a new night light and cuddly, some hot wheels cars - my dh asked me, 'but what's his main present?'. A friend also asked me 'what's his big present, though?'

Have I been stingey, do you do a main, more expensive, bigger present as well? Thanks

Not at all. That's plenty. I normally have a £40 present budget and get 3 Barbies, Lego, Squashmallow type toys. My eldest likes art supplies and Amazon gift cards. They all get a party which costs £100-150. So no 'main present' they are all under 10. Grandparents are big spenders too so they normally get a big toy from both sides. I take this into account and don't feel I need to go over the top. If it's a tight year and I can't afford the big party then I would have 3 or 4 friends for a pizza and play afternoon but I wouldn't buy more gifts. I don't go over the top at Christmas either. One main gift and 3/4 little toys each. Again grandparents buy a few toys so with 4 children I don't have the space! Your LO sounds very lucky .

Main presents don’t need to be big but it’s usually the one thing they’d really want and asked for. Examples of some a remote controlled speed boat £35 a snow glow Elsa think it was about the same and a ninja turtle super shredder £11 we searched EVERYWHERE for this figure though. Other times it could be bigger items ie scooter/bike games console ect but everyone parents different. I read somewhere something they want, something they need, something they’d like and something to read.

Think these gifts sound great! No more is needed as when they get gifts from their mates too then end up with far too much anyway!!

my DH also hasn’t got a clue, I usually sort all this stuff because I love it! I tell him sometimes when I remember, but he often forgets. We do a big present at Christmas, birthdays are smaller for us due to the friends giving so many gifts. Tk the point I ask relatives for money in his savings account instead of a toy. He’s 6 too.

We used to have a budget, and spend it differently in different years.

,No your child's present is whatever you want to give them/what they want/what you can afford. Provided those bases are covered nothing else matters. Some years might be 1 expensive item (a bike, a game console or a huge Lego set) sometimes it might be several small things.

The lego? That's a lot of stuff that's going to get abandoned

Lego was always a “main” present here - that stuff is expensive!

He's only 6. It's sounds like you already bought him plenty of lovely things. You don't have to pander to the expectations of others.

No. If there is nothing 'big' he wants, why buy something just for the sake of it? We all have too much stuff in our homes anyway!

No of course not, children need to learn to appreciate what they get. And that sounds very generous

I don’t think so.

DD has only just turned 3 but there wasn’t anything in particular that stood out as a ‘big’ present she’d like for her most recent birthday but I’d seen a few things in the £7-15 range I knew she’d like, plus she asked for an umbrella and a hula hoop - so that’s what she got. Her grandparents got her some magnetic blocks so I guess they were the main present in the end but not from us - although they were a prime day deal and came in under £30 (and I’d found/ ordered and wrapped them but grandma gave me the money but that’s by the by!)

Definitely not stingy. I usually use a birthday/Christmas as an opportunity to get something big they need rather than want like a bike/scooter/kindle etc which is why I usually get a big present. They are usually more excited by the little ones they have chosen though.

If he hasn't asked for a big present then no. He will when he's older, enjoy it while you can.

Don't think you have been stingy at all! We found the number of gifts was getting overwhelming once family and friends were factored in so started to do the whole ‘something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read’ thing, which means our kids just get 4 things from us (plus a few bits in a stocking from Santa if it's Xmas) and they’re more than happy with that! Sounds like you have thought hard about things he would like so size/expense is irrelevant: He’s going to love his gifts! :)

That's crazy. You've chosen a really lovely selection of toys that he'll love. And a few practical items that will be useful and last year's I'd imagine.

No "big" toy is necessary.

Try not to get caught up in the consumerist mindset. Happiness doesn't come from a "big" toy.