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Father threatening kidnap baby if split

10 replies

Newusernameaug · 02/09/2023 17:58

As the title says, my friend is trying to leave her abusive partner and he’s threatening to kidnap their baby if they split.

She has a primary dd from a previous relationship and baby with new partner.
He’s emotionally abusive to her dd and emotionally and financially abusive to her.

They’re currently living somewhere miles from anyone, with no running water, electricity, no shower etc.

What she’s concerned about it, is if she leaves and doesn’t tell him where she is, he may go to police / courts and that would look poor on her behalf, (and she’s happy for him to see their baby), but she’s genuinely scared he will take the little one if she does allow visitation. He has various friends and family he could stay with and could easily disappear.

Any advice on how to navigate this situation and get her and the kids out safely?

OP posts:
Soontobe60 · 02/09/2023 18:04

Yes - she must contact the nearest women’s refuge asap.
https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/

Patchesofdrizzle · 02/09/2023 18:12

Is he on the birth cert?

Singleandproud · 02/09/2023 18:15

She needs to contact Womens aid/ the link posted above, and if she's concerned hell ring the police and report her missing then she should notify them (on the non emergency number) that she is leaving and will be safe.

tescocreditcard · 02/09/2023 18:20

Do you think he means it? Or do you think he's just saying that to make her stay?

Newusernameaug · 02/09/2023 18:31

Patchesofdrizzle · 02/09/2023 18:12

Is he on the birth cert?

Yes

OP posts:
Newusernameaug · 02/09/2023 18:32

Soontobe60 · 02/09/2023 18:04

Yes - she must contact the nearest women’s refuge asap.
https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/

Thank you, she’s going to stay with me initially and was then going to claim UC and ask for a council property locally

OP posts:
Newusernameaug · 02/09/2023 18:34

Singleandproud · 02/09/2023 18:15

She needs to contact Womens aid/ the link posted above, and if she's concerned hell ring the police and report her missing then she should notify them (on the non emergency number) that she is leaving and will be safe.

Ok thanks - that’s a good idea to pre let the police know she’s safe and is leaving him.

She’s very wary of getting police / SS involved but I think that’s a good idea.

OP posts:
PrinceHaz · 02/09/2023 18:35

Petals she should also contact police for advice as he’s threatened kidnap. Does she have proof he’s done this?

Newusernameaug · 02/09/2023 18:36

tescocreditcard · 02/09/2023 18:20

Do you think he means it? Or do you think he's just saying that to make her stay?

I’m not sure, but she thinks he might be…. The baby gives him a ‘good guy’ family man story and would mean he gets housing / money etc.

OP posts:
Newusernameaug · 02/09/2023 18:39

PrinceHaz · 02/09/2023 18:35

Petals she should also contact police for advice as he’s threatened kidnap. Does she have proof he’s done this?

No proof of the threat to take baby, but she’s started recording their conversations and writing a diary of events.

She’s very wary of the police after a bad experience with her other child’s father - also abusive!

Ive recommended the Freedom Project to friend.

OP posts:
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