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Original poster

Were you living in your forever home when you first had kids?

117 replies

CDloop · 30/08/2023 21:41

I’m not pregnant yet but we only live in a small house at the moment and we’ll have to move at least once or twice. I love the idea of buying a forever home and having all your babies… but it feels unobtainable in this day and age what with interest rates! I would be interested to see whether most people do or don’t, at the point of having babies? Thanks.

OP posts:
FluffyDiplodocus · 30/08/2023 21:59

Yes, in that we don't intend to move. But it was a wreck when my first was born, loads of issues, awful kitchen, garden we couldn't use, boiler that was old and knackered, short on space, conservatory that made the whole house freezing etc. We've done a lot to it including an extension and the inside and garden are fairly decent now! I do wish we'd had the house nice before having kids, they couldn't play in the garden before this year and I still feel a bit embarrassed when having my kids friends over for the first time, I have to warn their parents that the drive is tragic (an abandoned sofa wouldn't look out of place) and promise the inside is much nicer! But I am glad we didn't put off having kids. Don't think we could have afforded a perfectly done 'forever house' even if we had waited to be honest!

backinthebox · 30/08/2023 22:15

Yes. We overstretched ourselves and bought a derelict cottage in the woods, and when I had our first baby we had only one working tap, one working electrical socket, no lights, wet plaster in every room, no windows in half the house, no interior doors. Photos of my husband at the time show his face wrinkled with worry. It’s been the only home our children have ever known though.

Babyenroute · 30/08/2023 22:18

No, we live in flat we are definitely outgrowing as our little one becomes more active but don't want to spend on moving before we need to

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mindutopia · 30/08/2023 22:21

Nope. We didn’t buy our first house til our first was 9. It’s a beautiful house and I hope I never have to live anywhere else. Absolutely no regrets waiting as long as we did. It meant we were in a completely different place financially and in terms of lifestyle, and could make a good sensible decision about where we wanted to settle down long term.

Leo227 · 30/08/2023 22:23

yes, we put off having children until we had bought and done up what we saw as our family home (and right level of jobs / savings etc) . it meant I was 37 with my first born.

TokyoSushi · 30/08/2023 22:24

Gosh no, we lived in a tiny, damp, 2 bed semi. We managed there for 2 years until we moved and then moved once more to our 'forever home'

kikoku · 30/08/2023 22:25

No, we had 2 dc in a 2 bed flat. Moved to a 4 bed house when they were 4 and 8m. Plan to stay here until the dc leave secondary school (maybe longer), but we need to leave before we get elderly as there are 5 floors of stairs!

Esgaroth · 30/08/2023 22:25

No, we didn't even have a bedroom for her. She was in with us until we moved when she was 11 months old.

waterlego · 30/08/2023 22:27

No. We lived in a flat when we had DC1; had moved to a house by the time we had DC2 and have since moved to a bigger house.

AllProperTeaIsTheft · 30/08/2023 22:27

I don't really believe in forever homes. But no, we definitely weren't. We moved between dc1 and dc2 and again when dc were 6 and 9.

Overthebow · 30/08/2023 22:28

No, we had a small 2 bed when we had our DC. We moved to a 4 bed when she was 1, and are now expecting our second DC.

BatshitIsTheOnlyExplanation · 30/08/2023 22:29

No, because you can't know what your housing needs will be until you know at least how many children you will have!

We moved to a 'suitable' house when #2 was on the way, but then needed to move again when #3 was about 5 years old.

Canthave2manycats · 30/08/2023 22:29

Had our first in 3 bed semi starter home, but moved before their first birthday to a 4 bed detached, which has been and hopefully will always be our forever home. Had two more children after we moved.

HeddaGarbled · 30/08/2023 22:29

No. “Forever homes” hadn’t been invented then.

Amonthinthecountry · 30/08/2023 22:31

Definitely not. We were living on a boat!

EversoDetermined · 30/08/2023 22:31

I don't really believe in forever homes either as you never know what lies ahead, but our DCs (older teens) were born after we moved here and we still have no plans to move so in that sense it is I suppose. It's a 3 bed terrace, we could afford to upsize and used to think we might at some point but have never really felt the need, the location is lovely and we're happy here so we've stayed put.

LadyGeorginaSmythe · 30/08/2023 22:32

2 bed house when we had baby 1. Then we had twins. Moved to a 3 bed just before the twins started school. Living space is sufficient but bedrooms are small. Unless we win big on the lottery it is our forever home though, I guess.

ChateauMargaux · 30/08/2023 22:32

We have lived in 3 houses since our first child was born.. I lived in 4 growing up, not counting the caravan 5 of us lived in for nearly a year and temporary accommodation between houses on another move.

Zwicky · 30/08/2023 22:32

Not a “forever home” but we moved in a year before dc with the intention of staying until dc were through school. Been here 24 years and planning on moving in 5ish years when youngest is finished education. We couldn’t do it now - we could never borrow enough. We had a 100% mortgage.

Frazzled2108 · 30/08/2023 22:33

No, was renting a small flat and had no savings, but didn't want to put off having a baby.

BiscuitsandPuffin · 30/08/2023 22:33

Yes we had moved into our gorgeous forever home, 4 bed detached with land on a beautiful cul de sac, and we were mortgage free. Then DH lost his job over Covid and I had a mental breakdown after DC2, and we had to move to SE England for work and both get jobs, and now we are renting with a view to buying a two bedroom flat any time soon.

I still haven't got over the fact we had to sell our forever home and leave our wonderful community or that the money we got for it barely buys 25% of a flat down here. Life doesn't always go in a straight upwards trajectory.

PickAChew · 30/08/2023 22:35

No. Phil and Kirsty weren't on the telly, yet!

Raggeo · 30/08/2023 22:37

No. We moved countries when my eldest was 1. We had a couple of short term rentals and 2nd child was born. Bought our hopefully forever home and needed to completely renovate it so finally moved in when kids were just over 1 and almost 3. The stress, time and logistics of a big renovation/modernising project as well as the normal upheaval of moving was really hard with a toddler and a baby. Would not recommend it if it could be avoided but my won't remember living anywhere else and I think this house is where we will stay until the kids have moved out and we retire.

ActDottie · 30/08/2023 22:40

No pregnant with our first and plan on moving in 3 years.

43ontherocksporfavor · 30/08/2023 22:40

I don’t ever think in terms of a forever home. We had children in our second home which we happen to still live in. Planned to move but it never happened as was convenient to stay. Eldest them came home from uni and moved away so need less space now . Home is not a building.