Most stupid mispronunciations and just weird words people say

[HumanDoing]

Them instead of those - them shoes
Pacific instead of specific
Should of instead of should have
Agreemence and agreeance instead of agreement
Chorizmo instead of charisma (the guy at work actually said it, pronounced it like a sausage)

@ScotInExile I know it's a Scottish word, that's exactly why I said in the post that I know it's legitimate in Scotland, so I'm being unreasonable...

I've met more than one Australian who says 'Patty's' instead of 'Paddy's' for St. Patrick's Day. They must be an anomaly since you've met all the others

Anyone done nukiller instead of nuclear yet? So, so annoying and used to be American pronunciation only but even politicians say it that way now.

@AllProperTeaIsTheft I don't put a "y" sound in stairs. I wrote it that way to try to convey that there's a long "a" rather than a short "a" in the way I pronounce it.
I'm not "claiming" it's more logical, I'm mildly suggesting that some would suggest it could be .. I just wanted to counter the opinions of some on the thread who have asserted that the way people with Scottish accents speak is wrong. Some PPs are suggesting we can't speak properly and that's rather irritating.
I'm not interested in squabbling about it and I'm not attacking the way anyone else speaks.
As a PP said upthread, this could be an interesting exploration of the range of vocabulary and expressions used by English speakers but it does tend to make those of us who don't speak "BBC English" feel criticised unfortunately.
I love dialect words wherever they come from. I'm really hoping it's correct that a microwave in Welsh is called a "poppety-ping" for example

I worked with a woman who said skelington instead of skeleton (we used to have a document called a skeleton UR).

Also, putting a k unnecessarily into words, like hospikal - I think it's a North Western thing.

I just wanted to counter the opinions of some on the thread who have asserted that the way people with Scottish accents speak is wrong.

That is totally fair enough. It regularly astonishes me that so many English posters seem unaware of the differences in pronunciation. It's almost as if they've never heard a Scottish person speak. Maybe it's just that although they would notice while actually hearing it, they can't summon up mentally what it would sound like.

@Palindrone the sign in train toilets saying do not flush while the train is in a station (or something like that) is another one! I know this use of while genuinely causes confusion though, my ex is a southerner and didn't get it at first.

The shop Dunelm is always written and pronounced DunHelm. It sounds wrong.

I work with a woman who mixes up wary and weary. It gets quite confusing.

I wondered if it's from sideshows? Had never heard it before in.

Thanks @AllProperTeaIsTheft and of course you are right that English spelling is often quite illogical with silent letters in many words. A nightmare for anyone learning the language I'm sure.

The PP who was objecting to the use of "panini" because the word is plural not singular. Of course you are correct; I was unaware myself until I started learning Italian, but that ship has sailed hasn't it.
I'm not going to insist on ordering a panino in a sandwich shop. That would feel very pedantic.

I did ask for a pain au chocolat in a bakers recently, pronouncing it the French way and the girl said "Oh you mean a pane oh chocolate!" I just said yes.

I live in New Zealand, and would never say wivverspoons

I'm ashamed and embarrassed

I am always happy to learn stuff!

Surely they are fans of the song Killer Queen?

100% agree. Unfortunately, these threads always seem to go this way.

I worked in a farm supplies store and you wouldn't beleive the number of different ways there are to pronoucne Glyphosate

Same. Also got language degree and it grates. My youngest also says "he always be's" I know there is no apostrophe but trying to write it it how he says it - usually in the context of his brother being mean - "mum he always be's/ bes nice when he wants me to play with him ". Sounds cute so I let it go!

I think it come from Showmen. As in the people who put on shows. Showmen are very distinct from Travellers and Romanies. They have their own representative body, The Showman’s Guild. Scotland has a strong association with Showmen and I guess this is recognised is Scots language as The Shows being synonymous with fairs.

People who say 'tenderhooks' instead of 'tenterhooks'.
Just no.

@AvocadotoastORahouse

The ad for Surf "perf with surf" sounds so awful to me as they are completely different vowel sounds in my accent.

I find it completely baffling, because the vowel sounds are miles apart in my accent (west coast Scotland) and I can't think of any incidence in which they might rhyme (unless anybody can enlighten me?).

Is it supposed to be 'perf with serf' or 'purf with surf'?

I spotted a new one. Not seen this before.

Rest-bite instead of respite. Seen it 3 or 4 times now.

I love this one. I know it's a mistake but it's such a perfect phrase, a bite of rest, it's quite witty really.

I find it completely baffling, because the vowel sounds are miles apart in my accent (west coast Scotland) and I can't think of any incidence in which they might rhyme (unless anybody can enlighten me?).

In most English accents (from England, and I'm pretty sure America too), 'surf' and 'perf' rhyme completely and they don't sound the same as either the Scottish 'urf' or 'erf' sounds!

the sign in train toilets saying do not flush while the train is in a station (or something like that) is another one! I know this use of while genuinely causes confusion though, my ex is a southerner and didn't get it at first

What do you mean? What confusion? (M genuinely interested to learn not being snarky). Or is that generally interested 😉

The PP who was objecting to the use of "panini" because the word is plural not singular. Of course you are correct; I was unaware myself until I started learning Italian, but that ship has sailed hasn't it.
I'm not going to insist on ordering a panino in a sandwich shop. That would feel very pedantic.

I did ask for a pain au chocolat in a bakers recently, pronouncing it the French way and the girl said "Oh you mean a pane oh chocolate!" I just said yes.

Yep, I struggle with this kind of thing a lot . My inner linguist berates me, but I can't quite bring myself to ask for a panino, because I'm well aware I would sound like a pedantic arse.

What do you mean? What confusion? (M genuinely interested to learn not being snarky). Or is that generally interested.

I think 'while' can mean 'until' in some regions!

@Poshjock ah, I see. I worked on a travelling fair in my 20's in the states and there they call the game stalls - joints which I found weird at first but just got used to. They did have the sideshows still - gorilla girl, freakshow, the snake woman all of which are fakes but still entertaining.