What in the buggery bollocks is this?

[ClemFandango1]

A 'pregnancy rattle'.
https://www.johnlewis.com/tales-from-the-earth-silver-plated-pregnancy-rattle/p110169031?s_ppc=2dx_mixed_fashion_BAU&tmad=c&tmcampid=2&gclid=Cj0KCQjwz8emBhDrARIsANNJjS5txO-gFDWF_6ISYyhbMo2HPG5UOsXtwtP55N9sKEf-kSZA35hEPeAaAn-oEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds
It looks like something with a quite different purpose!
But what in the world is a pregnancy rattle anyway?

Looks like an ornamental rattle to me, the kind of keepsake tat that people give new parents

Oh my good god. It says this

The soft chimes of this Pregnancy Rattle will serenade and soothe as your little one prepares for a grand entrance into this world. After birth, gently shake the rattle, while together, as a reminder of more peaceful times for both of you. As each piece is made by hand, the chimes are unique to you and your baby.

Who the hell comes up with this stuff?! If someone tried shaking that at me during labour they'd have found it inserted somewhere uncomfortable!

Makes me want to start a rage inducing thread. Pass me a rattle, quick!

It's to plug your arse so you make nice soothing sounds while you're delivering your baby rather than pooing yourself

@GoodChat 😂😂😂 surely not! I'm 50/50 whether I believe you.. I definitely want to 🤣

I actually wore a bola necklace when pregnant with all 3 of mine. It was a gift from someone after several miscarriages.

Not quite the same as sitting there shaking a rattle at my pregnant belly mind.

Sorry, I'm talking crap 🤣🤣

I'm enjoying the idea of a delivery buttplug to gently chime your baby into the world! Drown out the screaming.

😂😂

I'm sure I could think of many other things to spend £45 on.

The mere fact that anyone would waste money on this makes me wonder at their intelligence!

It seems to be a cumbersome variation on the pregnancy chime necklaces that used to be a thing. Is it so the dad/partner can be involved.....sitting there of an evening gently shaking the rattle over the bump?!! Personally I'd probably have brained my other half with it, he insisted on reading "Honk" to our baby in utero as he'd read somewhere it helped them bond. I hated that book!

@GoodChat 😂😂😂

@TheCountessofLocksley that's a fabulous image! Hours of fun shaking/ clobbering other half. Totally worth it

With the force I was using to bear down during labour that would have ended up shooting across the room and braining someone 🤣.

This is what happens when people have baby showers. They google for pregnancy gifts and this sort of tat comes up.
The marketing people know what they’re doing.

‘the chimes are unique to you and your baby’

The baby would grow up to have an irrational loathing of wind chimes and never know why.

Oh god, this thread is pure gold.
Or silver chime rattle 😂😂🤣

You wouldn't want to give that to me to rattle in labour I would have clobbered the midwife and my husband!

That's certainly an unique item

😂