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Original poster

Normalising small homes

261 replies

lorieats99 · 27/07/2023 19:42

I feel like you just see those big 4-5 bedroom homes on Instagram, and it’s often young-ish people in their 20s or 30s in them. I think that will be a thing of the past soon with rising costs. We rent a small-ish 2 bed new build and it’s easy to begin to feel inadequate about it! When guests come over there isn’t really anywhere for them to sit, as we just have one sofa. Two rooms upstairs, two rooms downstairs, downstairs WC and upstairs bathroom. Lovely spacious garden.

It feels like our home, I’d like a 3 bed in an ideal world but I don’t think that’s happening for us for realistically quite a while. Despite both being on average incomes we will probably be in our 40s before we achieve our forever home status. We are TTC soon, we have a small bedroom for the baby but we would have no room for a playroom or anything like that & I’m wondering how much this matters. I know in some parts of Europe people raise families in flats and apartments, and it’s very normal over there!

Does anyone else have a small home?

OP posts:
Skinnermarink · 27/07/2023 19:46

Well yes, millions of people have a small home. We live in a flat, it’s what we could afford to buy. Our son has his own room, we won’t be having another child, but I do really wish there was somewhere family could stay when they visited, and we only have communal outside space. It is what it is. I’m grateful we have a garage for storage.

Austrich · 27/07/2023 19:49

We recently moved from a 2 bed to a 2.5 but have just come down from the thrill of it and have felt similar. It's tricky to host with lots of "excuse me, sorry, sorry, can I just squeeze" Etc. and seeing other people with bigger in have felt a pang of envy.

Although I do have to remind myself that as many friends I have with 4 beds, I have many more who are not home-owners. And I guess despite having little rooms for guests it's nice that people want to see us!

I don't think it will really become the norm, as with the exception of new builds being smaller it's not like the larger houses are actually going anywhere! The market will change as boomers start downsizing/dying.

TrueScrumptious · 27/07/2023 19:50

I suspect many people can’t have homes of their own at all, not big ones, small ones or flats. My mid-20s DDs still live at home. It’s too expensive to move out -London. I do worry.

AuditAngel · 27/07/2023 19:51

We live in a big 5 bedroom house and it is a millstone. We have made the decision to downsize, we want to stay local as good transport connections, works for school/colleges and DH’s commute,

it may mean me going back to the office, but I am often the only one downstairs in this huge house and it’s an expensive waste of money. Hoping to downsize to a smaller 4 bed and be mortgage free

AuditAngel · 27/07/2023 19:52

Although I guess 4 bed still isn’t small. I grew up in a 3 bed with 4 kids, may have affected my choices

JumbledE · 27/07/2023 19:55

We live in a two bedroom house and we are about to have our third child! We love it! as we own it we have done a lot of space saving hacks to allow us to use the space we have well. Eventually when the children are bigger we will either have to move or convert the loft but for now we love that it’s a small mortgage, and it’s our cosy safe space! 😊

Lira715 · 27/07/2023 19:56

I had a small home until DD was 4 she had a little bedroom, small but cute and I used to conservatory to store toys and pushchair in. Was a lovely house and lots easier to clean than the one I’m in now.

ananabread · 27/07/2023 19:59

We could do with more space as DH now works from home and could use a designated office space and then space for home exercise equipment would be good, a utility room and more space for entertaining, none if it necessary but nice to have.

We are currently mortgage free though so ready to pounce if something comes up that suits us.

watersprites · 27/07/2023 20:01

Doesn't so much depend on location? If I moved further in to London I would have a small flat, if I moved out a house. Further out a bigger house.

watersprites · 27/07/2023 20:02

homes have gotten smaller though

Skinnermarink · 27/07/2023 20:04

watersprites · 27/07/2023 20:01

Doesn't so much depend on location? If I moved further in to London I would have a small flat, if I moved out a house. Further out a bigger house.

Yes absolutely. If I moved back to East Anglia I’d have been able to afford a 3 bed semi detached house as a first time buyer. Except I wouldn’t have, because without my job in London I’d never have raised enough deposit in the first place. We moved out to zone 5 to buy our two bed flat, but I hope we can staircase up to something bigger at some point- I know this would mean going further out.

CindersAgain · 27/07/2023 20:08

Even though many European families live in flats, I’m not sure they are particularly small. I think they tend to list property by sqm rather than number of bedrooms so they don’t have tiny rooms.
I wonder if there’s anything clever you can do with your living space to make temporary space for visitors. Happy to come up with ideas if you want? I know that wasn’t the point of your post though.

Mumof1andacat · 27/07/2023 20:09

I have a 2 bed. Decent size bedrooms. All open plan downstairs which we like. Think the whole of living space of the downstairs is the size of some people's lounges! But the best thing about it. It's ours. We worked hard for this, and it's home 🏡

MintJulia · 27/07/2023 20:11

I don't think it has ever been normal to have lots of space - look at the millions of two up, two down Victorian cottages that continue to be occupied by families. Houses built in the 60s and 70s were the exception I suppose. Bigger rooms and larger windows.

I grew up (1970s) in a 1930s bungalow that had two double bedrooms, and a damp little single, for seven of us. Three of us slept in the loft.

The issue is that the TV & social media portray everyone with spacious houses, large affluently furnished sitting rooms etc. but I'm not sure that's the norm.

You have a spare room. That puts you ahead of most.

Wishitsnows · 27/07/2023 20:13

They really should have a minimum requirement on room sizes for new builds. Some bedrooms can’t fit a bed

strongcupofTea · 27/07/2023 20:15

There's nothing wrong about living in a small home , we've lived in a lot of tiny homes and I grew up in them too, we were always fine and happy, but if you want a big home ttc and having a baby before you get one will slow your ability to get it right down.

NooNaNa · 27/07/2023 20:15

We have a bigger than average house and it's is the bane of our lives. It's old and damp and needy. I dream of downsizing to a manageable new build.

CrapBucket · 27/07/2023 20:15

I have a much smaller house than most of my friends and colleagues but I only share it with my children and dog, and (yippee) not my dreadful ex. I don’t know many people with a large house AND a happy marriage tbh.

For me the trick is not to have too much stuff. I don’t need so many kitchen cupboards if I don’t fill them with things I rarely use. And so on.

Due to my past experiences I am very adamant not to live beyond my means. By the time I can afford a bigger house hopefully my kids will have left home anyway…

Dombasle · 27/07/2023 20:20

This is an interesting group on Facebook showing small houses from all over the world and showing new designs for modern living-

facebook.com/groups/2610792295829485/?ref=share

Bluebellbike · 27/07/2023 20:23

My home is small. It is a bungalow and has a total of 4 rooms.
But there is only me living in it. I love how easy it is to clean and maintain. The location is important to me. I am within walking distance of all the amenities I need and there are good transport links to go further away.
I have to severely limit my belongings but have got used to that. I have a manageable garden though; that's important for me. I moved from a 4 bed semi with a huge garden. Best thing I ever did.

BreehyHinnyBrinnyHoohyHah · 27/07/2023 20:24

A lot of the 4 beds that were built a couple of years ago in my area are coming on the market now. I think sadly a lot of people over extended themselves and now need to sell up.

Enterchat · 27/07/2023 20:27

LOL no need to normalise small homes in this country. UK homes are famously known to be pokey and there's some real truth in that popular perception: our homes have less space per person than most comparable countries. And tens of thousands of us are overcrowded. A horrendous number of children live in homes so small for their family that there isn't space for a bed for everyone. Fgs don't encourage people to think that this is ok.

StarDolphins · 27/07/2023 20:27

Have a tiny 2 bed new (ish, 30yrs old) house. The kitchen is the tiniest room ever!I have my dining table in the lounge! It’s like a 2 bed flat but with a big front & back garden, a drive & a garage!

I love it, I love the garden & I just make sure I don’t hoard stuff I don’t need! My then bf (who wasn’t in the mortgage) wanted me to buy a big house saying this was way too small! So glad I didn’t!

dodobookends · 27/07/2023 20:27

Small houses are all very well, but where would you put all the guitars?

<eyes DH, who happens to be playing one of them right now>

Snoken · 27/07/2023 20:29

England had the smallest homes in the EU (pre-brexit) and I am sure they still do, so I think that even though people live in flats in other countries (they do in the UK too) doesn’t mean that the flats are small.

I think it’s fine living small (downsized from 5-bed to 2-bed) for where I am in life but I don’t think it’s right to cram in as many people as possible in small homes. A lot of people/kids benefit from having privacy and space even if the parents don’t see it.