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Original poster

Hugely first world problem but are my expectations of a housekeeper too high?

232 replies

SlightEmbarrassment · 13/07/2023 20:48

Prefacing this that I know I’m hugely privileged to be able to afford this etc.

We recently (Feb) hired a housekeeper on a full time basis (8 hours a day Monday to Friday, £45k annual salary) to look after our new house. She’s excellent at laundry and ironing, bed making second to none, but the house is not that clean and definitely untidy. Clothes and toys and STUFF out. Not a tip but not pristine or impromptu guest ready.
Am I unreasonable in expecting dusting, cobweb cleaning, putting things away in this time? I know I could do it myself but I’m paying her (I think) a good salary so I don’t have to.
We have a biggish london house but not a mansion - 6 bedrooms over 4 floors.

Part of the problem is maybe that she’s always talking on the phone on her AirPods, which I’m sure slows her down.

She’s also consistently 15 mins late but leaves bang on time, which again isn’t a huge amount of time she’s missing but feels irritating since I’m not sure the quality of her work is fantastic. There have also been multiple occasions she’s been a lot later due to various issues (dog was sick, plumber etc) but it’s happened more often than I feel is reasonable for such things to arise.

Part of the reason we hired her is my eldest daughter has severe dust mite allergies and associated asthma and eczema so it’s key the house is as dust free as possible to avoid asthma attacks etc. but shelves/ornaments are dusty.

But am I unreasonable in expecting a totally spotless, 100% tidy house everyday for her hours?

OP posts:
drpet49 · 13/07/2023 22:45

OakleyStreetisnotinChelsea · 13/07/2023 21:13

8 hours a day Monday to Friday? I mean on a Monday I would expect her to be tidying from the weekend but what does she do the rest of the time? Unless she's literally following you with a dustpan and brush or staying poised to grasp the mug from your hand the instant you finish your tea how can she not run out of things to do?

This! What on earth is she doing with the hours employed?

tt9 · 13/07/2023 22:46

OK... this woman is taking you to the cleaners. (sorry not sorry about the bad joke). for context, similar size house with just one occupant in my case - my housekeeper does roughly 12 to 15 hours a week. house is spotless + helps with cooking, shopping, water plants in garden etc. everything gets deep cleaned once a week as I am very vulnerable to infections. tbf I am the only one here and am quite tidy, but still. I would fire this person for lack of work ethic and find someone who takes pride in what she does. in terms of getting things done, I would recommend making a check list (I made one for daily and one for weekly tasks) and also spending time supervising a little at the beginning to help her get settled. I am quite particular (clinically insane) so it takes me roughly a month to get a new housekeeper trained up.

Bluesheeps · 13/07/2023 22:48

i also don’t think at that salary OP should be having to make a checklist

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Cleaning
lookingforMolly · 13/07/2023 22:48

45k!!!

I would expect the house to be immaculate for that wage.
She should be emptying the dishwasher when she arrives and cleaning out the dishwasher too!
Dusting everything.. vacuuming everyday to make sure there's no dust mites for your daughter's asthma.
Check what she's doing in the laundry room, she doesn't need to stay in there for ages while the stuff is washing!
The lateness should stop asap.
You have to take charge. You are her manager basically.
Don't be apologetic about having a housekeeper. You're paying her a very exceptional wage for what should be exceptional service.

ManAboutTown · 13/07/2023 22:52

Before my divorce OP my house was rather like yours - took about 8-1o hours to clean properly top to bottom - by which I would mean kitchen, both bathrooms, hoovering all the carpeted areas (and things like skirting boards) as well as mopping tiled ones.

With additional task like changing beds, laundering and ironing clothes and bedlinen you might get another 10 hours so 3 days in total. I'd split the cleaning over two morning - hoovering the stairs for example is hard going

I wouldn't expect anyone to have to tidy up after messy occupants though. Before my cleaner comes round I make sure everything is put away - it helps that it's just me and I'm pretty tidy.

tt9 · 13/07/2023 22:53

Tinyplant · 13/07/2023 21:23

I’m so fascinated by this.

Yeah, your house should be spotless with a 40hr/week housekeeper. Definitely hire someone else instead.

But like… what is it like having someone in your house all the time? Is it weird?

Are you constantly aware what she’s doing while you try to relax/get on with your day (eg “she’s on the top floor hoovering” etc)? Or are you out the house in the daytime anyway? In which case she must surely be taking a lot of breaks if the house is still messy and dusty.

Also if I was paying £45k a year for a housekeeper I would not be doing my own dishwasher or cleaning up after dinner! Madness.

if I was paying 45k a year. I would expect to lie in bed/sofa all day having meals delivered to me whenever I ask. I would not lift a finger.

Mumtothreegirlies · 13/07/2023 22:56

For £45k a year the house should be immaculate and she should be on time.

HydrangeaBlue · 13/07/2023 22:57

JaukiVexnoydi · 13/07/2023 21:00

I have never been in a position to have staff at this level, but I think the issue is that no-one can do the hard physical labour of active cleaning for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, it would be too gruelling. I don't put anything like this level of effort into keeping my own house clean and tidy (and believe me it shows) but when I do tackle it I can't keep going for more than 3 hours at a time.

You are not wrong to need this level of cleaning especially given the health issues, but you would be much better off employing the housekeeper for 3 hours a day 9-12 with managerial duties to include daily audits of the general cleanliness level of each room of the house (checking for dust etc) and doing any general tidying and organising that is beyond the scope of a cleaner, and some specialist cleaning duties where a higher level of care and attention is needed (e.g. cleaning valuable and delicate items), and subordinate to the housekeeper, two cleaners working the same 3 hour shift who do the actual physical labour and can keep up a good level of strenuous effort throughout that time because it is only 3 hours, and because their line-manager is right there making sure they are keeping it going.

How do you think tradespeople cope?! There’s a lot more hard physical work out there than cleaning and tidying full-time

MustardCress · 13/07/2023 22:58

She is lazy. A house of your size even over 4 floors should be spotless with 8 hours a day spent on it.

I can’t believe that some posters are thinking that you should tidy your house OP, when you are working 8 hours a day already, but your housekeeper shouldn’t when it’s her only job!?! And well paid.

Its really weird to suggest that keeping house for 8 hours is gruelling. It’s only that bad if you are doing non-stop end of tenancy or deep cleans on random crappy houses. In a house you know and have got up together it’s completely possible. Many people do this in their own homes (obviously!) and some also work. I can’t understand some of these bizarre replies. Must be posters from a lazy cleaners’ union.

Anyway, she’s taking the piss.

Ladybug14 · 13/07/2023 23:00

Agreed. She is taking you for a ride. And you're paying through the nose for it

Batalax · 13/07/2023 23:01

I can’t understand what on earth she does all day, especially with no cooking. She doesn’t even put all the shopping away or empty the dishwasher. She’s taking you for a ride.

MouseMinge · 13/07/2023 23:06

Some people seem to think she should be paid £45k and not have to put anything away because otherwise how will she have enough time to clean or change the sheets or ... she's working a 40-hour week and unless you're secret hoarders, which obviously you're not, your home should be immaculate and you shouldn't have to be asking any of us if you're being unreasonable, which obviously you're not. It's really unfair that you've hired someone to make your life run more smoothly and you're left stressed because she's not doing the job properly. On top of that, she's nearly always at least a little bit late, sometimes very late. I think she's seriously taking the piss. I would work my tits off for that salary and do everything I could to make sure I'd hold on to such a well-paid job that really isn't at all demanding.

AffIt · 13/07/2023 23:06

Now admittedly my house is a lot smaller than yours and with fewer people in it (no children, which obviously makes a huge difference), but by comparison, we have a cleaner who does six hours once a fortnight and my house is SPOTLESS.

We keep on top of the day to day stuff (dishes, laundry, keeping the loo usable and so on) in her absence, but I swear you could come into my house on any given day and check anything - back of the fridge, internal cupboards, top of door frames etc - and it would be immaculate. She is absolutely fucking brilliant and I am so glad to have her (I pay her well over the expected rate for our area, btw).

Clearly my cleaner has a good system that she follows. I would suggest you need to sit down with your HK, ask about her processes and routines, point out the areas where you think there are gaps and ask her how she intends to address those. Make sure there is nothing she is lacking to do her job and agree to review in three months' time.

Canidoitreally · 13/07/2023 23:08

If I was being paid £45k to clean your house full-time I'd expect you to be able to eat off the floor! I'm clearly in the wrong profession!!!

Kidsandcat · 13/07/2023 23:08

Sack her, you are paying 45k a year for cleaning!! Sorry that's crazy money to still have a dusty house. She should be doing everything for that, including cooking, washing, food shopping, ironing and emptying the dishwasher.

I must be a mug working so hard and keeping my own house immaculate for a lot less money than that!

Not sure why you don't just get an agency cleaner for 2 hours per day. Can't really see why you need someone for 40 hours for what you are expecting.

Fanlover1122 · 13/07/2023 23:10

Get back onto Greycoat Lumley and get a new housekeeper!

42coats · 13/07/2023 23:13

Get rid OP. I cannot imagine having 40 hours a week to clean a house, I would've thought she'd need 25 max.

I wonder is she on her phone running a side hustle from your laundry room?

goingtotown · 13/07/2023 23:14

You need another housekeeper. 40 hours a week & your house is still not clean, that's unbelievable.

Jazzhands7 · 13/07/2023 23:16

I’d talk to her about it. She may be spending time on things she thinks are important but not as important to you as dusting.

You could also spend eight hours cleaning your house and see how long everything takes you so you get a better idea of how long everything takes. I know when I’m cleaning my place everything takes much longer than I expect it to.

ASGIRC · 13/07/2023 23:20

SlightEmbarrassment · 13/07/2023 22:27

It’s the first time I’ve ever hired a housekeeper as well and from responses above it sounds like expectations vary but her agreed job description is to tidy, clean, do the laundry and ironing, in theory run errands but we haven’t asked her to do any, put shopping deliveries away (she half does this but leaves anything that isn’t fresh or frozen food out for me to put away). I think the main difference is it’s not just cleaning and scrubbing bathrooms.

Show quote history

That sounds exactly what my moms housekeepers job description.
And she does. In fact, if you cant find something, you ask Paula (the housekeeper). Because lets face it... shes the one putting things away!!!

Your expectations are fine. Its her work thats lacking.

IsThatHuw · 13/07/2023 23:21

I used to work with someone who had been a Head Housekeeper in a smart hotel. She organised all the cleaning staff in a rota, so certain jobs had to be complete every day (beds, laundry, hoovering etc.) but then each day also consisted of a rota to do e.g. skirting boards, deep clean bathroom, ditto kitchen etc.

Surely someone experienced on that salary must have a system and is not just winging it like the rest of us?

ballsdeep · 13/07/2023 23:22

LobsterCrab · 13/07/2023 21:03

8 hours a day, 5 days a week? Yes I would expect the house to be tidy!

I was thinking exactly the same!!! And for 45k 😱😱😱😱😱

ManAboutTown · 13/07/2023 23:22

Jazzhands7 · 13/07/2023 23:16

I’d talk to her about it. She may be spending time on things she thinks are important but not as important to you as dusting.

You could also spend eight hours cleaning your house and see how long everything takes you so you get a better idea of how long everything takes. I know when I’m cleaning my place everything takes much longer than I expect it to.

I've seen my current cleaner in action she does things way more quickly and effectively than I do.

Even folds the ends of my toilet rolls into little triangles like they do in hotels😃

SarahAndQuack · 13/07/2023 23:26

JaukiVexnoydi · 13/07/2023 21:00

I have never been in a position to have staff at this level, but I think the issue is that no-one can do the hard physical labour of active cleaning for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, it would be too gruelling. I don't put anything like this level of effort into keeping my own house clean and tidy (and believe me it shows) but when I do tackle it I can't keep going for more than 3 hours at a time.

You are not wrong to need this level of cleaning especially given the health issues, but you would be much better off employing the housekeeper for 3 hours a day 9-12 with managerial duties to include daily audits of the general cleanliness level of each room of the house (checking for dust etc) and doing any general tidying and organising that is beyond the scope of a cleaner, and some specialist cleaning duties where a higher level of care and attention is needed (e.g. cleaning valuable and delicate items), and subordinate to the housekeeper, two cleaners working the same 3 hour shift who do the actual physical labour and can keep up a good level of strenuous effort throughout that time because it is only 3 hours, and because their line-manager is right there making sure they are keeping it going.

I have read right through this thread so I know I'm not alone, but ... what planet are you on?!

Do you realise how incredibly rude your post is to anyone who does hard physical work? Cleaning is not terribly taxing compared to some manual jobs, and it is so fucking insulting to suggest that the only reason contract cleaners keep working is because 'their line-manager [sic] is right there'. Cos otherwise, obviously they'd slack off, is that what you mean?

I can't even begin to think what you mean with your comment about not letting cleaners at 'valuable and delicate items'. Are you worried the scullery maid might steal the silverware?

SoShallINever · 13/07/2023 23:28

Good Lord. £45k is more than a senior health care professional, ie; a ward sister!
She is completely taking the piss.
I will come and work for you. My organisational skills are second to none, I'm super professional, wouldn't dream of using the phone at works and I will also shop, garden and cook in that time.