No party food or drink provided

[ImaMumtoaboy]

So my ds(11) went to a football party yesterday. The minute we got in the car he asked to go the shop for a drink as he was so thirsty.
Party was at the local astro pitch, party room included that has 2 ovens, hob, 2 toasters, 2 microwaves and 2 fridges. Most parents bring in frozen pizzas and chips and cook them or order in pizzas.
Kids were running around for 2 hours in hot weather they were not offered any drinks during that time.
He said in the "party room" they got 1 small bottle of water (250ml) and a small slice of birthday cake. They only went into the room 10 minutes before I arrived to collect him.
When I went in the mother was packing up the cake which looked like there was about 3/4's left. I thought the kids must have had enough food that they didnt want cake. And parents cleaned up very quickly. Kids were all quiet(14 11/12 yr old boys) who are normally very loud at parties. Kids were just sitting waiting to be collected.Turns out they got a very very skinny slice, described by ds as thinner then a slice of bread.
Ended up bringing him to Mcdonalds as a treat and we seen 2 other parents of kids that were at the same party getting their kids food.

They sound like poor hosts to me.

A whole banana? Oh yeah so that makes up for the missed meal that’s lunch?

Have you ever admitted you were wrong? I mean you must be a delight to live with……. Not!

Stop digging, the hosts were mean as was your comment about cake! 🤦‍♀️

I have no problem with that sort of party honestly, but would have expected a bit of comms from the hosts beforehand. My son usually has a joint party with a friend and his Mum and I got sick of there being so much left over food when we did a proper meal so now we just do a packet of crisps and the birthday cake and tell everyone to bring their water bottles, but we do have squash too... But we also now time it differently so its not over a meal time and we tell parents what we providing in advance so they know. Its expensive to pay on parties and some people are on a mega tight budget so I wouldn't judge too harshly but they should maybe have just said in the invite that they would do a drink and snack and reminded them to bring their water bottles...

Most boys of 11 can wolf down a pizza, which is not going to break the bank. They're not bothered by the fact that it's a very cheap supermarket pizza, most hungry boys of this age would consider eating the box too, in seconds!
You don't need fancy food and I would certainly not have a childrens' party "catered" because all you need is the basics, maybe that is why it gets thown away?
If you have a party at lunchtime (which this one was) you need to provide some food.

I think it's just about saying some people are incredibly tight. Water is free from taps, more cake would have been okay if there was nothing else, it's a party FFS. And over lunchtime, of course it should have been mentioned 'bring a packed lunch' but of course that would just have highlighted the stinginess and put people off coming.
I worked for a family support organisation and where a family was too poor to afford party food, we'd put out an appeal and all chip in with food items.
No reason why the parent couldn't have said 'Sorry but due to X circumstances we're really short of money at the moment, really grateful if people would be able to bring a plate for lunch.'
Asking if their child is going to be fed when they're visiting someone else's house at lunchtime sounds like extra stingy too. If ours are going to be at other people's homes over mealtimes, unless they're invited for a meal I send them with a packed lunch.

Are you purposely acting slow?

MustWeDoThis · Today 10:08
darkmodeon · 25/06/2023 16:24

Most kids have water bottles too.

“Are you purposely acting slow”

How rude are you? I always sent ours with a water bottle, whatever the activity.

It's funny because I have been hosting parties for a decade and a half and NEVER encountered children barely eating.

I wonder if those excusing the meagre "food" provided at this "party" have a strange relationship with food

It really is not normal to expect 11 year old boys to be happy with a small sliver of cake after playing two hours of football over a period where they would normally be eating a meal.

Omg how awful, it’s a wonder they didn’t all die.

It's hardly a wonder now, is it?

Still doesn't excuse the fact a party without food and drink isn't a party.

I find it bizarre they would book it for 12 -2.

If you dont want to provide food, then surely something like 2.30 to 4.40 would be better.

But to actually BOOK it over lunchtime is plain odd

Or maybe they couldn’t afford to do a buffet and thought an afternoon of football would be better than nothing. I imagine most parents would bring a bottle of water to an activity like football anyway

Why wouldn’t a parent bring a water bottle for their children who are playing two hours of football in the sun? Yeah maybe drink should have been provided, but they need a water bottle too, to stay hydrated

Or maybe they couldn’t afford to do a buffet

Oh please. They paid for a venue. I don't buy that as an excuse at all.
It was poor hosting. End of.

I'm in Belgium and a birthday party álways comes with food. There is the cake with the candles of course. For other treats some parents have a lot of sweets and crisps etc. ready, others opt for pizza or hotdogs or hamburgers&fries. I usually do some trays with candy but mostly with cubes of cheese and salami, grapes, cherry tomatoes. Sometimes cheese sandwiches or hotdogs. For drinks I use a large water container (Ikea) I fill with icecubes , water and lemon slices. The children love operating the tiny tap themselbes and can take for themselves as mich as they want I also have applejuice and some local artisan's lemonades and give those out a few times during the party. Nobody ever goes home hungry. In case of leftovers I wrap them up and we finnish them at home.

If you're not going to have food, don't schedule a party at lunchtime. Even if was 2-4, though, I would have offered some sort of snacks plus juice and water.

Or maybe they’re just selfish and mean…

or maybe they are shameless and lack basic manners... which is what all signs point too.

I don't understand the apologists on here. It was pretty obvious the "hosts" were mean spirited. They could afford to pay for a venue instead of just having a kick around on a public field. Then they took most of the cake back home with them.

Either the apologists have a weird relationship with food, or they are completely lacking in social awareness or they are just tight fisted.

Because I recognise portion control in cake?

Portion control in birthday cake 😂

What a joyless existence.

Thick as a slice of bread after 2 hrs of sport is ridiculous as 25 ml water

Or just plain mean?

Maybe, just maybe, one of the parents or a friend or family member works there, and got the one available slot free that day...

Some of you must be in such comfortable situations, it must feel great throwing mud from your ivory towers. No kid will have really thought about food whilst they were happily playing with their friend, and if any of them were seriously hungry then that says a lot about how much food they get at home TBH. No kid is going to remember the party just on the lack of a sandwich basis, unless a parent keeps telling them about it........

My son had a couple of what he thought were good friends, but they refused to come to his party as it wasn't laser shooting or trampolining, neither of which remotely interested my boy, once he'd helped them get through their exams we never heard from those friends again

Maybe the parents are simply mean, maybe they are trying their best to do some small specail thing for their son, but please do not start it amongst the other kids so that the poor birthday kid gets bullied or laughed at, that really isn't on