Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

How old is 'too old' for a child to be naked at a splash park?

277 replies

00100001 · 19/06/2023 15:53

Sitting here with the 4yo niece charge at a splash park... 6/7 year old girl running round starkers! I'm a bit shocked tbh.

Now I have been "caught short" before, but she's just been sent in the water in her knickers, because she can always just go commando on the way home.

I think anything around 3+ is too old tbh.

OP posts:
LolaSmiles · 19/06/2023 21:06

I wouldn’t think twice about letting the 3 year old go naked, and neither would dd. Some of the replies here do strike me as rather prudish
Why is it prudish to acknowledge that if someone wants access to children, especially naked children, they're going to target places where some parents allow their children to be naked?

There's something weird when having boundaries between children and adults is considered prudish.

Original poster
00100001 · 19/06/2023 21:12

thewillowbunnies · 19/06/2023 20:59

I would have complained personally.

Just not appropriate at all. Any age.

You go naked in your own back yard - in your own privacy.

Complained? To who? Confused

To what end? The kid being taken away from the play area? The parents being embarrassed?

It's completely up to the parents if they allow it or not. I think it's too old personally, but doesn't mean I'm right...

OP posts:
latetothefisting · 19/06/2023 21:14

Georgig · 19/06/2023 16:02

Totally naked at 3+ is a bit weird, I have no problem with girls in just bikini bottoms until they're 12+ and actually have something to cover!

what??? A girl of secondary age in just bottoms in public is far worse than a primary school kid naked. Bearing in mind it's fairly normal for girls to have started puberty by 8ish now.

I don't think there's any need for kids of any age to be naked tbh. Under school age they're probably not reliably continent, over 4/5 surely it starts being mixed messages regarding 'private places', consent, who is allowed to see you naked etc.

Also as OP says (although 'caught short' makes it sound like they had a toilet accident?) there's no reason why they can't just go in their pants if they absolutely have to go in water and don't have kit.

Original poster
00100001 · 19/06/2023 21:18

Caught short can mean be without something you need.

But yes, I suppose it's usually used in the context of needing a wee.

OP posts:
Justrolledmyeyesoutloud · 19/06/2023 21:28

I think the only place a child of any age should run qmaround naked is in their own private home or garden - makes me really uncomfortable to see. You jimust don't know who os there there . Plus l worry about them getting burnt. Plus ones who are usually in nappies, l don't want to see their wee/poo coming out

woppydoopy · 19/06/2023 21:42

I can honestly say my 7 year old daughter would simply be mortified being naked in public. I know I'm maybe weird but I hate even seeing toddlers on the beach in the nip on holiday I just think it's weird tbh

TheaBrandt · 19/06/2023 21:46

Some of the parents on this thread are frighteningly naive.

TheShellBeach · 19/06/2023 22:25

TheaBrandt · 19/06/2023 21:46

Some of the parents on this thread are frighteningly naive.

Aren't they just.
It's worrying.

TheShellBeach · 19/06/2023 22:31

Nomorenonbinary · 19/06/2023 19:12

I don't understand the replies here. I don't let my child go naked because she is very fair and I worry about sun damage. But if I did let her she is in no danger as long as I am with her.

No danger?
Did you know that paedophiles love being in areas where small children play?
And that they go there on purpose to take covert photos, for wanking over?
And loads of them share these images online with their friends?

How exactly are you protecting your child from this?

Original poster
00100001 · 19/06/2023 22:37

Nomorenonbinary · 19/06/2023 19:12

I don't understand the replies here. I don't let my child go naked because she is very fair and I worry about sun damage. But if I did let her she is in no danger as long as I am with her.

She isn't I'm danger, no. But how would you feel about her picture being posted on the dark web? Would you think "oh well, she wasn't in danger!£ or would you be thinking"if only I'd made her cover up...even just her knickers!"

It's a terrible shame we live in a world where we have to think like this, but...we do.

Just because the kids.in Italy run round starkers doesn't mean it's OK to give paedophiles access to naked children in public!

OP posts:
Maddy70 · 19/06/2023 22:47

wutheringkites · 19/06/2023 15:58

I agree and I think most British people probably would but views on this differ across Europe.

Definitely. I live in Spain it's certainly not unusual for kids of that age tonne naked at a public water site

holaholiday · 19/06/2023 22:57

This is highlighting a really interesting issue….why are we in the uk apparently so concerned about this due to potential paedophiles whereas most of mainland Europe wouldn’t bat an eye???

BlinkeredBay · 19/06/2023 23:00

holaholiday · 19/06/2023 22:57

This is highlighting a really interesting issue….why are we in the uk apparently so concerned about this due to potential paedophiles whereas most of mainland Europe wouldn’t bat an eye???

Because they’re neglectful and lax and we are not?

olympicsrock · 19/06/2023 23:02

4 is too old.

holaholiday · 19/06/2023 23:02

BlinkeredBay · 19/06/2023 23:00

Because they’re neglectful and lax and we are not?

Show quote history

How can the whole of Europe be neglectful and lax but we are not?? Paedophilia exists in every culture and country .

TheaBrandt · 19/06/2023 23:02

Who cares what they do on mainland Europe? If you are an aware person who has read about the subject or seen any of the documentaries about how widespread this is you would put some sodding pants on your kid.

holaholiday · 19/06/2023 23:04

I think I feel like highlighting that the majority of abuse takes place within families or by someone known to the child…..we do seem to have an obsession with paedophiles being a separate species.

BlinkeredBay · 19/06/2023 23:05

holaholiday · 19/06/2023 23:02

How can the whole of Europe be neglectful and lax but we are not?? Paedophilia exists in every culture and country .

Show quote history

Yes you are correct they do, so why are they so neglectful and lax that they expose their children to be potential dark web victims?

You tell me why they do that?

Again, I’ll ask the benefit to the child of being naked? What are they?

TimeToMoveIt · 19/06/2023 23:09

holaholiday · 19/06/2023 23:04

I think I feel like highlighting that the majority of abuse takes place within families or by someone known to the child…..we do seem to have an obsession with paedophiles being a separate species.

I think the majority of people are aware of that

I still don't want to risk naked pictures of my children being taken by strangers and postered on the Internet

AuntMarch · 19/06/2023 23:10

"over 4/5 surely it starts being mixed messages regarding 'private places', consent, who is allowed to see you naked etc."

This was my immediate thought, I was surprised to get so far down the thread before someone said it! If I were to tell my son "oh this one time is fine", what's to stop him believing it if someone else says it?!

So it isn't about being prudish, the reason it would make me uncomfortable would be because it makes the child vulnerable.

When it was needed, I always had a swim nappy in the change bag during the summer. Now, always spare pants and shorts with me in case we do get caught short (in the more common context!). If really necessary I'd rather he was nuddy in the car (always have a blanket in there), or I'd just be the mean mum and say not today.

holaholiday · 19/06/2023 23:22

BlinkeredBay · 19/06/2023 23:05

Yes you are correct they do, so why are they so neglectful and lax that they expose their children to be potential dark web victims?

You tell me why they do that?

Again, I’ll ask the benefit to the child of being naked? What are they?

Show quote history

I think a picture of a toddler running around naked at a splash park is ,sadly,totally inconsequential compared to the sort of material that paedophiles can access via the web. I’m not arguing for a free for all, I think I would have started covering up my kids more around 4/5 too….but having lived abroad I am genuinely interested in why it is different. I do know that in general people underestimate the risks to their kids from people close to home and over estimate the risks from strangers….out of the 3 people I’ve known in my life, 2 were abused by women and yet we would be far less likely to have a thread on the need to cover up kids in a female change room (well, pre trans debates anyway!)

BlinkeredBay · 19/06/2023 23:24

holaholiday · 19/06/2023 23:22

I think a picture of a toddler running around naked at a splash park is ,sadly,totally inconsequential compared to the sort of material that paedophiles can access via the web. I’m not arguing for a free for all, I think I would have started covering up my kids more around 4/5 too….but having lived abroad I am genuinely interested in why it is different. I do know that in general people underestimate the risks to their kids from people close to home and over estimate the risks from strangers….out of the 3 people I’ve known in my life, 2 were abused by women and yet we would be far less likely to have a thread on the need to cover up kids in a female change room (well, pre trans debates anyway!)

Show quote history

What’s the benefit to the child to be naked?

TheFairyCaravan · 19/06/2023 23:26

Children should never be naked in public.

There was a program on, a few years ago, about catching peadophiles. They found one man who used to spend a lot of his time in the public toilets at the beach and around the beach, itself, throughout the Summer because he had access to lots of naked little children. He didn’t want to touch them, he wanted to photograph them and share them on the internet. You can be right next to your child but you can’t protect them from that.

My children never went naked, not even in our garden, because we were overlooked.

,

justasking111 · 19/06/2023 23:31

A little girl was murdered in our town. The police asked anyone who had filmed photographed their own child that day at the paddling pool to come forward with the footage. The police were shocked to identify a number of known paedophiles there that day.

So know not in public

holaholiday · 19/06/2023 23:31

BlinkeredBay · 19/06/2023 23:24

What’s the benefit to the child to be naked?

Show quote history

I’m not quite sure why you are so focussed on it having a benefit? some cultures don’t read as much into nakedness as perhaps us brits do….and perhaps some cultures don’t sexualise children’s bodies (or adult bodies ) to the same extent in the way this thread suggests?? It’s why there has been culture clashes with refugees living in the very liberal Scandinavian and German nations .