Are UK parents obsessed with getting their kids to bed early?

[RosieLeaLovesTea]

Am I the only one that thinks UK parents are obsessed with getting their kids to bed early? I see posts of 7pm/7.30pm, some as early as 6pm.

I work full time and don’t get home until 6.30pm. We don’t eat until 7pm. So generally 9pm is bedtime. Plus it means that if we do go out at weekends our kids are used to going to bed a bit later.

And in Switzerland people tend to be in for the night by 7pm.

Newsflash, different countries have different ways and different families have different ways.

Who’d have thunk🤷‍♀️

carduelis she is absolutely very self sufficient now but there's certain things i want to discuss/cover that i'd rather she wasn't around to overhear....little ears tend to flap I find! and when she's awake we like to be together/she likes to be near us, even if doing her own thing.

I think it depends very much on each family’s circumstances. Mine (4 and 1) are in bed between 6:30-7:30pm. They have to be out of the house at 7am which means being up by 6:30am at the latest. They are both tired from long days at nursery and need close to 12 hours sleep so this works for us. We let them stay up later on holidays, etc. If we weren’t out of the house so early, maybe we would have a slightly later bedtime (although they’d still be up at the crack of dawn, just more tired!).

@soberfabulous Ah yes, my 9-year-old is SO nosy!! But she spends a lot of time outdoors on the trampoline or crafting/playing independently. You might find, though, that the later she goes to bed (and therefore the more time she has with you), the more likely she is to want to spend some of that time by herself, as she won’t have to concentrate all of her time with you into a short space…? (Or she might not, who knows with kids!)

“Early to bed early to rise
makes a man healthy wealthy and wise”
”an hour before midnight is worth two after”
two sayings drilled into me by my mother and I tend to agree- kids need quality sleep and are much more pleasant early in the morning to be around -depends on the age of the kids but under 10s 7:30 is late enough

carduelis The nosiness!! God forbid she misses out on anything!

Yes, that’s a good point about her potentially preferring some time alone.

We do have plenty of time together - on the days I WFH she’s back from school at 330 and tends to hang around in the lounge whilst I work.

I love her and spending time with her is fantastic, she’s such great company.

I just need an hour to myself each evening to decompress.

Watch me come back here in a year or two saying I never see her and miss her being around in the evening :)

Do you remember being a kid, and hearing kids outside playing outside and you were in bed? It sucked big time. I hated it and I vowed that my kids had autonomy with bed time. Guess what i stuck to my word and kids self regulate. Weekends i here them 1am playing online and weeknights they are all asleep by 9pm. When it comes to sleep let nature do its work. We get up 6.30am weekdays but weekends 10am ish. No rules just set goals.

Ours were in bed by 7 when very young, having had a bath and a story. I was a sahm and they ate their main meal at lunch time. It worked for me. At weekends, I cooked a main meal for them and kept it hot for my husband and I to eat later. I'd have gone nuts if my little ones hadn't been in bed by 7 because my husband worked very long hours and also had a long commute so he left home very early and got home very late. When they were older and didn't need as much sleep, they went up half an hour before lights out to read or do something very quiet so they could settle down, I could still have 'me' time and at weekends it meant my husband and I could have 'us' time.

My kids (3 and 7) are in bed by 8, the eldest is usually asleep by 8.45 and the youngest falls asleep while the eldest is having his story. I think the youngest would ideally suit a 7.30 bedtime but they tend to go up together and he then sleeps in longer in the morning.
I do find it strange when people complain of early risers when they put them to bed at 6-7.

I will never let my children self-regulate though. I self regulated as a child/teen. Id regularly be awake till midnight, often later.
I was exhausted. In secondary school I used to fall asleep on the bus on the way to school every morning, I had puffy eyes. I had wonderful parents but they never valued sleep, just didn't see it as a big deal, figured I'd go to sleep when tired, but I didn't get tired in the evening. I was a night owl, what I needed was some structure and discipline.
I remember feeling so sorry for my friend who had an early bedtime all through secondary school because she couldn't watch certain programmes, but on the flip side she was wide awake all day, she was never tired on the bus or struggling to stay awake in lessons.

Doesn't Spain have to stop for 2 hours midday though for the heat?

Partners' son 15, shared care goes to bed at 8 and has always had an early bed time (with his dad). He doesn't go straight to sleep but has time for himself. Always had a bedtime story when younger which was good for bonding. Most adults don't sleep enough so early bedtimes are fine!

If you woke her up at 7- 730 her body clock would adjust and she would go to sleep earlier

7.30pm Is reasonable. 9pm for children under 10 is terribly late. Cbeebies goes off air at 7pm where they sing the bedtime song just before going off air... if little ones have a structured routine, bedtime just falls into place around 7.30pm gor mine and us parents who have had a long hard day taking care of said children and who need and absolutely deser some timeout time, wether it be a glass of wine or a cuddle on the sofa watching grown up TV shows or movies after a long day of peppa pig, Andy's aquatic adentures and clifford, the big red dog!!

Each to their own, But 7.30pm is not early for a kid's bedtime, It is appropriate for them not to be exposed to grown up materials that may arise once Cbeebies and other kiddie shows end for the day as after that is considered the 'watershed' anything after that is not kiddie material being shown on screens.

I bet this is why we have so many under aged pregnancies! Young ones being exposed way too early because they stay up so late and risk seeing things they cannot unsee.

This is what happens for us on a Tuesday

We swim 4/430

Have packed tea in car /at home 5 ish

Dry hair etx and usually in bed 6ish on a Tue as she is tired and you can see she's had enough

She's usually in bed 630

Last night was at school friends did play date - bed was 7pm and I had to wake her 745 this morning for school

I do think some people underestimate how important sleep is for children. Lack of sleep will affect learning/growth/mood/hormones.

I know every child is different that is why the guidelines vary by an hour or so.

Yes this, straight into pj's at the pool, home for soup or beans on toast and into bed.

My kids are adorable little assholes if they don't go to bed on time, 7pm start for the 4 year old and he's usually out between 7.30 and 8pm, 8pm for the 7 year old but she can take hours to finally fall asleep and it shows when it takes longer.
7 is hard to get up a lot of mornings anyway, so her getting up a bit earlier wouldn't hurt as she's a stroppy moo if you have to forcibly drag her from the depths of unconsciousness and 4 gets up full of the joys of spring, normally around 6.30ish but is quite content to play with his toys or watch some videos and chill out for a bit. It's earlier at the minute because it gets light at bloody 4 and he seems to be finely tuned to the light!

But yeah, it'd be the same bedtimes no matter where we were from and where we lived, because that's how my kids are hardwired and that's the bedtimes they need to be functioning {mostly} humans.

Lots of people here are saying it doesn’t matter what time their kids go to bed, they still get up really early…. it’s the same the other way round! My 9-year-old has started getting up half an hour earlier for school in the last few weeks and she’s still wide awake at the same bedtime.

It is entirely possible for children to be up past 7pm and not be watching adult TV (or any TV). I’m pretty sure my daughter isn’t going to get pregnant at 14 because she watched Bluey and Operation Ouch at 8:30pm when she was 9…

When my son was small my husband didn't get home from work until 7.30 and we had to go to collect him from the station, so ds went to bed around 8. I can't remember exactly what time we got up now. 7am at the latest as I also worked.

My mom sent all of us to bed at 7 untill we were at least 12. Once 12 & up 7.30 or 8 was considered very late and special. And yes it was because she wanted to be rid of us.

I wish lol..tried that for a month straight, just had grumpy baby..

You do it gradually so 830 for few days. Then move 15 mins every 3 days

Once your dd goes to pre school you will have to wake up earlier and she prob will go to bed earlier as well

In the end children are different and every parent does what works for them

What are you on about ? This so simply cultural . Most countries puts kids to bed way after 9:30 and have lower pregnancy rates . Also what 10 yearbooks watches cbeebies 🤷🏻‍♀️.

My 5 year old goes to get ready for bed at 7 and is normally in bed and asleep by 7.30/7.40pm. We're not "obsessed" by it being this time but she needs a certain amount of sleep and we work (I'm not full time, hubby is) so she has to be up at 6.30 every morning and most days this involves her being woken up as she would naturally sleep until 7 / 7.30 if we left her (which we do on weekends). If one of us is off work and there's no rush the next morning, we're a bit more lax about bedtime.

My 6 y/o granddaughter goes to bed 7pm but has stories and cuddles and is asleep by 7.30. She has to be up by 7am at the latest, ready for school. If for some reason things get delayed, she asks to go to bed.