Are UK parents obsessed with getting their kids to bed early?

[RosieLeaLovesTea]

Am I the only one that thinks UK parents are obsessed with getting their kids to bed early? I see posts of 7pm/7.30pm, some as early as 6pm.

I work full time and don’t get home until 6.30pm. We don’t eat until 7pm. So generally 9pm is bedtime. Plus it means that if we do go out at weekends our kids are used to going to bed a bit later.

Surely depends on the child?
some I know need a lot, others not as much. However I do like a good routine that bases the child waking at a time ready for school and they are not tired at school (which is parents may not know about).

Not obsessed with early bedtime, but am aware that need to get enough sleep. Mine are heading into teens, and sleep deprivation is linked to mental health issues as well as poor diet (sugary foods for energy) and lack of exercise. So during term time I do want lights out 930, later at weekends and more lax in holidays.

If I can achieve sleeping and eating healthily and some exercise on the 80/20 rule, I consider it job done.

If somebody's kids need to have 10 full hours sound asleep and will only ever wake up at 5am, fair enough.

What baffled me were the ones who would send them to bed by 5.30pm, then spend the next five hours going spare at the kids for not sleeping when they didn't have to be up until 7.45am - the kids would just get more and more wound up until they were awake for even longer than if they'd waited another couple of hours. Especially when the Disney videos on a TV in their bedroom were introduced 'because it's the only way they'll stay in there' (yeah, staying in there wide awake because they're watching TV).

Mine were 8pm bed/8.30-9pm sound asleep kids from the outset - one would snap awake by 6 without fail (once she'd grasped the concept that humans needed to sleep at all) the other would be relatively reasonable with a 7.15am start. Which suited me because I went to work straight from school and picked them up around 5.30pm, travel home 30mins, an hour of 'stuff' and one for relaxing, bath and story.

There was definitely an element of 'pride' to having the one that was awake the earliest for some of them, others doing exactly the same with what would, if true, actually be an indicator of something worthy of medical attention 'Oh, he's straight in bed before 4.30pm and sleeps right through until 10am'. I was just glad we'd found something that finally worked with needing to keep a roof over their heads. And the ex pontificating about how 'proper mothers get up at 4.15am to do housework if the children aren't up' could fuck right off.

Really depends what time you want to get up in the morning. For those who prefer 5/6 am then clearly an early bedtime. The reverse for later risers. Certainly at weekends pre sports activities we preferred a lie in.
British people are obsessed with early bedtimes. Fits in with the no children in restaurants rule.

No. 8.30-9pm is standard in our house. When they were under 4 it was about 8pm. If they fell asleep earlier, that was just a Brucey bonus 😉

Children are different. Some need more sleep than others. Some parents want / need more time as a couple after their children go to bed. There are no rules....as long as your school age child isn't falling asleep in lessons or behaving badly because they're exhausted, just do what works for you.

Haven’t read all the posts but yes, we are. My youngest is exhausted and tends to go to bed by 7pm, slightly older children 8-8.30pm. It works nicely for us and we also wake very early (around 6-6.30am).

Not obsessed but we have to be up at 6 in order for me to get to work on time, so 7:30/8 bedtime it has to be. If I didn’t have to be u for work I would let them stay up an hour later (4 and 5 year old). Maybe people from other countries start work later or their children need less sleep 😂😂

Completely normal for young children to be in bed for 7pm. They need their sleep. Going to bed later very rarely meant they slept longer, and then became over tired and grumpy. 9pm is very late for young kids. I always find it strange that young kids are up that late.

Both of mine are up until 9, but both sleep in until I wake them on weekdays and 8-9 at the weekend. I much prefer it.

When they were in nursery it was get up 6am to get out of the house 7am latest to be dropped 730am. Picked up 545pm home light snack tea as eaten at 430 at nursery. Bath by 7pm bed 730pm this routine stayed until lockdown when they then literally got up got ready and came down so no 730am at breakfast club and bedtime got relaxed to 830/930pm
now in highschool and up 645am to get out the door 755am but now the club's are ramped up pretty much every night tea isn't until 7/730pm and the are in her by 930pm
never impacted weekends staying up later and DS no matter what is awake every day by 7am even if had a late night
kids need a certain number of hours of sleep so not sure it's obsession of just trying to make sure they get enough to and development. Ours also didn't nap, when they became toddlers, during the day and slept through from 9 and 11 weeks if nursery did put them down for a nap we couldn't get them to sleep until gone 11pm. I honestly think it's what's best for you and the kids and knowing they are getting enough sleep so they can concentrate at school

My GC (8and 4) are generally in bed by 7.30 on school days. They don't fight it and seem to need a lot of sleep as they don't wake particularly early. I have to say that my children didn't go to bed so early, but everyone is different.

My 18 month old goes to bed at 6.30pm, I could force her to stay up later but that doesn't seem very fair when she's absolutely exhausted (and she does nap in the day) it's whatever works for your family and theres nothing wrong with making sure you have some adult time in the evening, it's healthy.

It's very different to some other cultures, like if you go to Spain lots of families are out late with the kids, for a number of reasons but it's much more normal there, England isn't so family friendly in the evenings to be honest anyway.

As a single parent I wouldn't get anything done / time to myself if bedtime was 9pm! After a full day of parenting or work I'm generally quite keen for my toddler to bed asleep by 7.30pm.. for my sanity. Also as lots of people have mentioned, we need to be up at 6.45/7am anyway for childminder and work, so anytime later than 7.30pm and he gets over tired as the week goes on.

Not sure why it would be a British thing as such, but it's definitely a me thing! Do what suits you and your family

I can see why you'd want to keep them up later if you work full time and don't get to spend much time together - but do think this is a little bit selfish if it means they are getting tired from going to bed late then having to be up early for nursery/school every day.

Definitely a trend especially when compared with southern European countries but nothing wrong with it. Every society and family within it makes decisions based in different needs.

Not every child with a late bedtime is being “kept awake” by selfish parents. I routinely fall asleep while reading bedtime stories to my two while they prod me to try and keep me awake…

At the lower end of normal a young school aged child may need 10 hours sleep. When I was leaving the house at 8am then 9pm wasn't very late for our routine. I slept 10pm to 6am, DS slept 9pm to 7am.

Not obsessed but when they were babies/young children then they need 12 hours that would be 7.30-7.30 when we got up. And I liked an evening too.

Putting young children to bed at 9/10 would only work if you could get them up at 9/10 otherwise they just wouldn’t have had enough sleep.

In other countries I think primary school children still have a nap at school so that’s why the later bed time works. They do in Spain.

We were flexible on holiday.

So true! 😅

I had a good routine for mine ( I thought!) but they were so bad at going to bed we never dared leave them with a babysitter.And they were so bad in the morning, luckily school was 5 minutes walk away. More important to me than any league tables!
Hey guess what, they turned out OK, all graduates and nice people, and as adults recognise the value of an early night!

@Delatron
I can assure you that primary school children do not nap at school in Spain.Not even the ones in reception. This information is completely wrong.
Don’t know where you have found this…

My Spanish teacher who is from Madrid told me.

@Delatron I am Spanish and can confirm that we most definitely NOT nap in primary school. Also most people don't take naps during the week, that's a weird myth. Maybe in the summer if it's really hot and you aren't working, but that's it.

Not every child no, but the OP said if hers went to bed at 7pm she'd 'never see them'.