Nothing to leave my child when i die

[Rosieblue12]

Ive been a single mum to my son since he was 3 years old, we are survivors of domestic violence , and since then its just been me and my boy, he is now 19.
we have always lived in social housing and im grateful for the roof over our heads. We only got this house because we got put on the witness protection program for our safety years ago and got housed with their help, Ive never been in a position to get a mortgage, and save money, whenever ive tried to save something has always come up and ive needed to use the money, The house we are in is a housing association house and there is no 'right to by' option.
I worry so much because i have nothing to leave my son when i die,
If i were to die tomorrow he would be homeless, i can't sleep at night worrying about it. and in this country the cost of living is so high.
is anyone else in a similar situation ?

I grew up in care, fortunately with my grandparents, until it was no longer possible when I was 15. Not a penny legally (the placement was in a very developing country) but health, stability, love, values, just so, so much… and memories I wouldn’t trade for the world.

Although I own my small 2 bed semi detached house outright I am 60 in November and my son is 18 and planning to do warehouse work full time. I do worry about care home fees being as four of my relatives ended up in nursing homes. I am seriously planning to take a tablet aged 80 before I get bedridden or Alzheimer's sets in. I want my ds to be able to benefit from his inheritance when he is older. I would deeply resent handing over money to the government. Op all you can do is no doubt continue what you are doing already ie foster good life skills good strong work ethic and good budgeting skills and building himself a supportive network of friends.

Our offspring will always remember the love and guidance we have given them. This has no financial value whatsoever but to be honest carries higher value than just money on its own. Ds is also lucky in that he isn't a total only child he has many fine half siblings on his dad's side albeit 100 miles away so only visits them every few months. I still believe however it is the love we show our relatives that is the most significant legacy. I know it from my own bereavements.

Well done op on getting away from your abusive ex. Many women do not achieve this and it shows you have strong presence of mind and good coping skills. Give yourself a pat on the back.

I think it's better to get educated on what types of life insurance and plans there are and go from there. Much of the info on this thread 'get life insurance' does not pay out on death, so I'm not sure why people refer to this as an inheritance.

There's life insurance for a term, that's the most usual one, and that is one you pay often when your kids are unable to earn for themselves and when you have a mortgage, many mortgages require this. So if you have a 20 year mortgage, you cover the cost of the mortgage for 20 year term and it expires after that. That's what most people mean by life insurance and it does not give you an inheritance unless you die within the term!

Whole-life policies do exist (life assurance), but are much more expensive as they have to pay out! Some are just small funeral plan ones, such as those advertised on telly and those pay out a few thousand and you might be paying in for a long time. Others are more like investment vehicles and require considerable investment over the long-term.

Please get advice on this and don't just 'get life insurance' thinking you will be getting £100k at the end, the vast majority of life insurance does not pay out, which makes sense otherwise how would the companies make money if they paid out far more than you put in?

There's a balance here- if you pay a lot for say a funeral plan, you might be better off just saving the money over the long term in a specific bank account with a good interest rate, the returns are poor unless you are at death's door!

Life insurance is more expensive as you age and if your health is poor so again, this is an odd suggestion.

I think a lot of people on here need to know more about all these different financial products as many seem to think they are offering far more than they are not- you don't get given £100,000 when you die for £40 a month unless you tragically die young (within the term)!

I also agree if you have any pension provision whatsoever, get him named as beneficiary and update all your details.

You've kept him fed, warm, safe and loved. That's all any child can ask of a parent. If you died tomorrow he could probably take over the tenancy of your housing association property. He's old enough to get a job and make his own way.

I grew up in a single parent household after my Dad died suddenly. Money was tight. Mum had nothing to leave us after she died other than memories. Me and my brother both have our own careers and houses. We're not rich but we are independent because we were raised to be. Your son will be the same.

Don't spend so much time anticipating your death that you forget how to live....

Yep, me. I was a teen mum, left a controlling relationship and always lived in social housing. I haven't had much family help so I've always had to work low paid jobs to fit in with childcare. DS is 15 now so I can work more but I'm still quite junior at work and I only earn £24k, I am doing courses to work my way up (admin) if I can work up to a senior position I can increase my wage to around £32k. I'll never be able to buy a house though.

Luckily a perk of having subsidised rent is that hopefully I won't have to ask DS for too much money towards bills when he leaves education and starts working. So my hope is that he will live at home for a while and save money to buy his own place. He's scientifically minded and is predicted high grades for GCSE so I hope he can build a good future for himself without having to rely on me.

✌️for you, sounds like you’ve done great.
Just watch out for the risks of that first year of uni : healthy balance between experimenting and work. I’d also have him get a summer job where you get him used to putting aside some saving money and fun money (my parents left me to pay everything and it was quite isolating, of course it depends on your means). It will also give you an idea of if he can handle work and school at the same time, how to spot and avoid burnout, etc (much better to adjust your expectations now, plenty can’t do both and it’s completely fine).
Id also advise you to put even £10 a month away if you can for a secret emergency fund for uni (broken eyesight glasses, trust me there’s always something!)
Best wishes

But you have got something to leave him
All the positive times together all the love you have for him
Make sure he knows you love and support him and continue making memories with him
Not every parent leaves money to family despite what you read here sometimes.
Sort out life insurance for yourself to pay for your funeral .Let him know what you want in terms of service songs tea afterwards
Make a will and a power of attorney
These things are good things to leave
Make sure he knows where all this is
This was all my mum could leave me it took the pressure off us
Don't waste your life regretting

Speaking as a child of a single parent who worries endlessly about this- we don’t want your money or a house, we want you happy and healthy.
Don’t waste time thinking about this. Encourage your son to start squirrel away any money he has. Get him a good interest savings account, and do the same yourself.

Great advice, thank you.

Nothing to leave except a house 😂😂😂😂 you're totally discounted from the conversation unfortunately