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Original poster

Would you let your 10 year old do this?

115 replies

ThatsANiceHandbag · 10/06/2023 20:30

Me and dp can't agree.

Dc 10 has been invited to a new classmate's birthday party along with the rest of the class. The party is at their house. I have never met the parents and only ever seen the child once, never spoken to them. As there will be so many children (hopefully) going, they have requested that parents do not stay.

Would you let your dc go?

OP posts:

Weal · 10/06/2023 22:20

I see what you mean op, it is a weird idea dropping you child off to people you don’t know. However as he’s 10 I assume he is going places for short
Periods alone. Eg changing for swimming lessons alone, popping to the shop alone, playing with friends at the park alone? In all those places there will be strangers. I think the important thing is to talk to him about keeping himself safe and what he can do in different situations if he doesn’t feel safe. Eg if he has a phone tell
him he can text a code word if he isn’t happy and you will arrive to collect him
and make up an excuse.

thelinkisdead · 10/06/2023 22:20

Gosh my ten year old would be mortified if I was this neurotic 😂 Five - yes; ten - goodness me 😩😂

Forgetaboutme · 10/06/2023 22:22

I wouldnt even be giving it a second thought. I have a 10 year old ds and when I think of the freedom he has in terms of going to the park and going to friends houses who's parents I dont know I'm really surprised you'd think twice about this.

Interested in this thread?

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10 year olds Families

sunshineandshowers40 · 10/06/2023 22:24

Wouldn't think twice, although I might try and catch the mum and introduce myself. With my youngest I stopped staying at parties when they were much younger than 10.

Wishitsnows · 10/06/2023 22:24

Yes, of course!

underneaththeash · 10/06/2023 22:26

This isn’t real folks. No-one could be this precious. The child is 10.

Moonlightdust · 10/06/2023 22:28

And I thought I was over protective at times 🙄

JMSA · 10/06/2023 22:28

Bloody hell, of course!

Mellu · 10/06/2023 22:30

No parent I know has ever stayed at a kids party beyond the age of about 6! On the whole the rule is that when you pick your kid up you might stick around for a chat and a slice of birthday cake. That's where the gossip happens 😁 How else do you think you will get to know class parents?! At ten, you really need to let go. You can't control every aspect of their lives at this age (and by secondary even less so).

eurochick · 10/06/2023 22:30

I wouldn't think twice. Drop and go parties have been the norm since year 2 at our school.

JayAlfredPrufrock · 10/06/2023 22:30

I think we were dropping and running from around 6 or 7 for parties.

What are you concerned about?

cocksstrideintheevening · 10/06/2023 22:31

Of course if contact details. Have you really attended all parties until now? Drop and run from y1 here

Ketzele · 10/06/2023 22:32

See it as preparation (yours) for secondary school, when you don't know any of the parents!

mondaytosunday · 10/06/2023 22:32

Sure why not? I I rarely stayed at parties after Y1! Just be prompt in picking up.

Theoldcuriosityshop · 10/06/2023 22:33

Never thought about staying at kids parties when mine were small. No parents ever stayed, this was 5 year olds as well. The worlds gone mad.

Hellocatshome · 10/06/2023 22:34

Of course I would it wouldn't even be a question in my house. Buy a card stick a fiver in and send them off to the party.

Sarahtm35 · 10/06/2023 22:35

yes I would. Unless your child has special needs, at 10 they’re old enough to attend a birthday party on their own.

ThursdayFreedom · 10/06/2023 22:35

Alongtimelonely · 10/06/2023 20:56

Yes.

imagine 30 kids in one house … those parents are mad!

@Alongtimelonely depends where you are on the line between 1bdrm flat & Buckingham palace really.

Coffeaddict · 10/06/2023 22:38

Yes

NerrSnerr · 10/06/2023 22:40

ThatsANiceHandbag · 10/06/2023 22:12

Dp thinks that dc should go. My concerns are that I've never met these people and my dc will be in their care for a few hours. I know they will be with their friends but it just seems odd to me. These are complete strangers.
Dc is very nervous around dogs too. I don't know what pets they have but Imagine a dog around all those unfamiliar and lively children. Anything could happen!

If it was a friend or someone I was familiar with I wouldn't have hesitated to let them go.

Why not ask your child to ask the birthday child at school if they have a dog. Then at least that anxiety will go.

Won't they be going to secondary school next year? You do need to start giving some freedom so they know how to manage without you in social situations.

TheShellBeach · 10/06/2023 22:40

Why not?

TenoringBehind · 10/06/2023 22:41

Yes

clary · 10/06/2023 22:47

OP unless there is some massive SEN-related backstory here then I really think you need to relax. Is there some specific reason for your concern?

I imagine at 10yo your DC is doing things without you? I am involved in a sport and the kids aged 9+ are expected to be there without a parent - it's fine.

I dropped and ran at kids' parties from age 5. Normal round here. Also yy at secondary you deffo will not know the parents as there is no school-gate chat time.

Original poster

ThatsANiceHandbag · 10/06/2023 22:51

Dc has plenty of freedom. They walk to and from school, play out with friends etc.

My concern isn't with the fact I can't stay at the party. They have been to many friends parties by themselves. My main concern is that they are strangers. Ideally I would like to see a parent when I drop dc off.

Dc will be going now btw.