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Original poster

Should I comment on friends filler?

86 replies

readysetcake · 09/06/2023 20:01

Friend said she was going to get small amount of lip filler as she was unhappy with thinning lips. Fair enough, go for it.

I saw her this morning for first time I. A couple of weeks and she’s obviously had it done. They’re not massive but noticeable as having had filler. Trouble is I think she looked better before. Would obviously never say that …. Would it be ok to just not mention it and if she brings it up just say I never noticed? I’m worried that she is going to ask what I think it looks like. I don’t think I’m a very good liar. I don’t want to hurt her feelings 🙁 So definitely don’t want to bring the subject up.

As long as she’s happy with it that’s the main thing. She was licking them a lot so maybe she’s literally just had them done and they’re still a bit puffy and will go down a bit?

Things like this stress me out loads. I’m going to be so anxious next time I see her.

OP posts:
GoodChat · 09/06/2023 20:04

Don't mention it unless she asks. If she does, say they're bigger than you expected.

Gunpowder · 09/06/2023 20:08

There are lots of ways of not lying and also not hurting people’s feelings by offering a brutally honest opinion.

If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything. If she brings it up you can smile and say ‘Wow! Yes you said you were going to do it! How was it? Did it hurt? Are you happy with the result?’

If she directly asks you if you think it looks good, you can say you think she has always had natural beauty and doesn’t need help, but if it makes her happier that’s all that counts.

CherryOBaybe · 09/06/2023 20:09

Don't say you didn't notice it's an obvious porky and you're not good at lying focus on her eyes and if you can't then say sorry they just look so different if she says dont you like them say i'm not a fan of fillers in general.

If you have fillers but you don't like hers tell her I think they are a bit bigger than you expected and deflect by asking her whether she's happy with how they turned out.

ClusterFuckIt · 09/06/2023 20:09

Of course not.

LarryStylinson · 09/06/2023 20:10

@Gunpowder has hit the nail on the head with diplomacy!

TomatoSandwiches · 09/06/2023 20:11

Just quack at her next time you see her.

Muggyoutthere · 09/06/2023 20:11

Why would you comment? She isnt asking for your approval and she is an adult who has made a choice.
Do you feel the need to comment everytime a friend wears some shoes or a top you don’t like? Or blow dries their hair in a way you feel doesn’t suit them? or does their make up in a way you feel isn’t as flattering as the way they did it before.

leave her be and stop being judge and jury over another woman’s appearance let alone someone who is meant to be your friend.

continentallentil · 09/06/2023 20:14

How good a friend?!

If you mean best mate, then if she asked what I thought I’d say they were a bit bigger than I expected, if she asked if I liked them I’d say her being happy is what counts… but for me personally I like a natural look so I’d try splitting the difference.

I don’t think people are proper friends if they don’t give you honest opinions. If someone thought I’d overdone something, I’d want to know. You can be honest without being rude.

continentallentil · 09/06/2023 20:14

To be clear, if she didn’t ask, I wouldn’t comment.

USaYwHatNow · 09/06/2023 20:14

I've recently had filler for the first time and I'm about 4 weeks post. At 2 weeks post filler they still hadn't settled properly, so I wouldn't comment. You may find next time you see her they have settled/become less swollen. None of my friends noticed mine unless I actually pointed it out.

Beezknees · 09/06/2023 20:25

If she's only just had it done they will reduce in size a bit, they always look bigger to start with.

rightioly · 09/06/2023 20:26

I think if she asks you what you think it is ok to say something along the lines of "do they feel comfortable? I noticed you keep licking them"

rightioly · 09/06/2023 20:26

TomatoSandwiches · 09/06/2023 20:11

Just quack at her next time you see her.

Don't do that that's rude

Guessthevoice · 09/06/2023 20:41

Gunpowder · 09/06/2023 20:08

There are lots of ways of not lying and also not hurting people’s feelings by offering a brutally honest opinion.

If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything. If she brings it up you can smile and say ‘Wow! Yes you said you were going to do it! How was it? Did it hurt? Are you happy with the result?’

If she directly asks you if you think it looks good, you can say you think she has always had natural beauty and doesn’t need help, but if it makes her happier that’s all that counts.

This is lovely 🥰

RoxyMuzak · 09/06/2023 20:44

I asked an acquaintance if she'd been in a fight. Oh dear.

Grumpigal · 09/06/2023 20:49

Absolutely do not say you preferred her before. How would you feel if someone commented on your new hair style that they thought it was worse than before or new outfit “oh you looked nicer in your old tracksuit”?

these are things called internal opinions we don’t need to say them out loud, unless absolutely asked for the honest truth. And even then, there are diplomatic ways of speaking a hurtful truth.

DyslexicPoster · 09/06/2023 20:52

Just say they look nice but you preferred her without as she was pretty anyway?

HeadNorth · 09/06/2023 20:53

USaYwHatNow · 09/06/2023 20:14

I've recently had filler for the first time and I'm about 4 weeks post. At 2 weeks post filler they still hadn't settled properly, so I wouldn't comment. You may find next time you see her they have settled/become less swollen. None of my friends noticed mine unless I actually pointed it out.

Didn’t you read all the posts saying to pretend you haven’t noticed if they don’t look very good? Honestly, I am sure you friends preferred your natural beauty, but we’re being tactful.

rightioly · 09/06/2023 20:53

Grumpigal · 09/06/2023 20:49

Absolutely do not say you preferred her before. How would you feel if someone commented on your new hair style that they thought it was worse than before or new outfit “oh you looked nicer in your old tracksuit”?

these are things called internal opinions we don’t need to say them out loud, unless absolutely asked for the honest truth. And even then, there are diplomatic ways of speaking a hurtful truth.

I think that's a good point. Like if someone has a rubbish hair cut you can only really say anything bad if they are about to get it cut again and ask.

tillyandmilly · 09/06/2023 20:56

can’t understand why people have these duck lips - they look ridiculous!

MonumentalLentil · 09/06/2023 21:01

tillyandmilly · 09/06/2023 20:56

can’t understand why people have these duck lips - they look ridiculous!

But they offset the slug eyebrows or the hedgehog ones and the fake talons.
People don't want to look natural any more.

TinyRebel · 09/06/2023 21:06

I must be a terrible friend because I’d probably greet her with an “Alright fishlips?”😂

RoxyMuzak · 09/06/2023 21:25

I recently read in the Guardian that there is a rising trend in getting fillers reversed, including that Kate Moss’s half-sister Lottie had paid £450 to get lip fillers then the same price to get them dissolved, Blac Chyna had hers dissolved, and Courteney Cox said her biggest 'beauty regrets' were “Fillers”.

RoxyMuzak · 09/06/2023 21:26

"Instagram face", my daughter calls it.

sevenbyseven · 09/06/2023 21:32

Don't say you hadn't noticed! Imagine if she got them topped up as a result.

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