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Original poster

5.5 months postpartum and I think I'm pregnant again - HELP

59 replies

Namechangeed · 30/05/2023 15:04

Sorry it's long just want to add in all details.

Had a very faint positive this morning. I have a long history of early miscarriage so not taking it for a definite positive until it gets stronger. But it's definitely there.

I am so torn on how to feel. DH and I have been using protection, plus I'm breastfeeding. My periods are back but irregular that's why I tested because I'm not sure on dates.

DH is currently looking at getting the snip as he's adamant on having one child, as was I. But now I don't know what to do if it gets stronger.

I've heard it can result in high risk pregnancy, plus financially it would be a strain but not impossible, not to mention how hard it will be with a 1 year old and a newborn. But I don't know if I could not continue with the pregnancy as it was so hard to have DS. However, not against it in any way at all, and will seriously consider all options.

Has anyone else had this and been okay with two very young children at once?
I'm trying to work out all the pros and cons but can't think straight!

Can't confide in DH right now as he will pass out if I tell him. 🤣

OP posts:
darkbit · 30/05/2023 15:10

If you've been using protection how has it happened?

Oh god, I'm not sure what to say but I reckon retest in a couple of days, and then speak to DH!

What do you really think you'd want to do?

ThreeRingCircus · 30/05/2023 15:15

I'd be very surprised if you're using contraception and you're breastfeeding but it's not impossible I suppose!

My friend had two with a similar age gap and essentially just treated them like twins. I'm sure it was tough in the early years but they're both now in school (one in Y2 and one in Y1) and they're doing really well.

Original poster
Namechangeed · 30/05/2023 15:20

Honestly, I have no idea. And with having a little one there really isn't much opportunity for us in the bedroom. My eyes nearly popped out my head this morning!

I will retest in a couple of days and see how it goes. I would love another LO in all honesty but obviously want to make sure that it will be really well thought out decision.

It's comforting to hear about the Y1 and Y2 children getting on well. At least I know it's doable. I just don't know anyone else who has had this happen so quickly!

OP posts:

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Original poster
Namechangeed · 30/05/2023 15:22

Protection wise it's been condoms as I wasn't comfortable taking anything else for a little while. Had enough hormones flowing the past year 🤣

OP posts:
Whataretheodds · 30/05/2023 15:23

My friend is only 14 months older than her sibling and has deliberately had her babies close together (16 months apart). She's a big researcher and wouldn't have done it if she thought it was a material risk.
Did you have a c section or VBAC?

Original poster
Namechangeed · 30/05/2023 15:24

I had forceps and was induced at 42 weeks. I'm afraid to Google it again because when I did earlier it was not comforting at all 🙈

OP posts:
Flymetothemoon2000 · 30/05/2023 15:35

I have two children 13months apart and while it was very hard work when they were younger, the age gap is paying off now They're 7 & 8. They play together nicely, but equally argue and they're into the same things, which makes days outs etc much easier.

It wasn't planned but I'm so glad it happened. 😊

Glückspliz13 · 30/05/2023 15:38

Hi Op, happened to me and the baby years were busy but we got through them. Have a teen and pre teen now and they get on really well. In a way it was good to have them so close together

pinkyredrose · 30/05/2023 15:40

darkbit · 30/05/2023 15:10

If you've been using protection how has it happened?

Oh god, I'm not sure what to say but I reckon retest in a couple of days, and then speak to DH!

What do you really think you'd want to do?

No contraception is 100% effective, surprised you don't know that.

Good luck op!

ASGIRC · 30/05/2023 15:41

Dont have proper experience, but my brother and I are 10 months apart.
And my mom says it was actually not that bad. Sure, it was busy, but we went through our milestones not that far apart and were in the same class at school.

Best of luck

ADHDDDDDDDBOOM · 30/05/2023 15:44

Condoms, breastfeeding and a faint line?

Are you sure it isn't just a clear blue crap test?

whinetime89 · 30/05/2023 15:44

My youngest 2 are 13 months apart. It was a hard grind when younger but I love it now (6/7) they are either besties or fight but wouldn't change it

Maxineputyourredshoeson1 · 30/05/2023 15:46

Me and my brother are 13mths to the day apart. My DD’s are 2yrs 7mths apart and my DM has said on many, many occasions she’s glad she had the age gap she did because my DD’s age gap was harder.

DrMirandaBailey · 30/05/2023 15:49

I have two 12 months apart. Didn't plan it that way and it has been hard but honestly I think it's hard regardless of the age gap. If I had the choice I'd do it again this way.

Being pregnant whilst caring for the baby was probably the worst bit

ColourMeBlue · 30/05/2023 15:55

There is one year and one day between my two-its honestly not as hard as it sound.,change nappies the same time,bath the same time,bed at the same time.they also have each other to play with,my two were so close when they were little.it was lovely seeing them together.

speedyhedgehog · 30/05/2023 15:57

My first 2 are 14 months apart. Of course its full on at first but they've always been close. 19 and 20 now and both at uni, both studying medicine. I had c sections for both and that was hard. I tore some of my stitches picking up the 14 month old and had to have it fixed later on. All mine are close in age and they're all close as siblings.

Beamur · 30/05/2023 16:00

A friend of mine genuinely got pregnant 2 months after giving birth. Then had twins. 3 babies under 1. Apparently mental but also delightful - especially once they were a bit older.

Mynextusername · 30/05/2023 16:02

I am 12 weeks pregnant and my son is 4.5 months old! To be honest once the shock dies down it’s fine. I’m sure there will be times that are difficult (the first year at least!) but then after that we will see the rewards.
I will be consultant lead through the whole pregnancy so I’m not worried about the risks as I’ll be well looked after.
I’ve had a few comments from people but hey who cares!

Original poster
Namechangeed · 30/05/2023 16:06

Sorry if I'm a little late replying as my DS is teething like crazy today!

Thanks so much everyone. Some amazing stories to read through which has given me such a sigh of relief. It's so much nicer to hear from people then the doom and gloom of Google I experienced this morning 🤣

It would be amazing to only have thought we could have one then magically be able to have two! Keep feeling a bit up and down about it. It's definitely early days and with my history I'm unsure what to expect in the next few days. I'll definitely update the thread as the days go on.

Just to add - The test I took was just a cheap strip test from a pack of 2. I actually took the first one yesterday but just assumed the vvfaint line was because it's a crappy test. When I took it again this morning and saw a stronger (but still faint) result that's when panic set in!

OP posts:
ADHDDDDDDDBOOM · 30/05/2023 16:07

Maxineputyourredshoeson1 · 30/05/2023 15:46

Me and my brother are 13mths to the day apart. My DD’s are 2yrs 7mths apart and my DM has said on many, many occasions she’s glad she had the age gap she did because my DD’s age gap was harder.

That's what they call rose tinted glasses 😉

Vintagecreamandcottagepie · 30/05/2023 16:13

We had two 14 months apart, it was honestly great. The next one came along with a similar age gap and that's what nearly killed us so be warned!

SummerSimmer · 30/05/2023 16:15

I have a tiny age gap and my DB and I are are 15 months apart, there are so many advantages to a small gap.

Original poster
Namechangeed · 30/05/2023 16:30

Mynextusername · 30/05/2023 16:02

I am 12 weeks pregnant and my son is 4.5 months old! To be honest once the shock dies down it’s fine. I’m sure there will be times that are difficult (the first year at least!) but then after that we will see the rewards.
I will be consultant lead through the whole pregnancy so I’m not worried about the risks as I’ll be well looked after.
I’ve had a few comments from people but hey who cares!

Do you mind sharing how that works with the consulting?

Hope you're feeling okay! A lot going on at once for you 🙈

OP posts:
MightyEagle · 30/05/2023 16:34

Of all the things to consider, I wouldn't get too hung up on "it'll be impossible having a newborn and a 1yo". In some ways it's easier than a 2.5-3 year gap, especially if you can get them both napping at the same time! And a 1yo doesn't really care what they do, so long as they get out the house and go for a potter somewhere most days.

My kids are 18 months apart and then nearly 3 years, and I found the 18 month gap easier. Good luck with whatever you choose.

Suchardchoccy · 30/05/2023 16:37

I had my DD2 when my DD1 was 16 months, so I got pregnant when I was about 7 or 8 months PP. It is very hard but I know it will be worth it having a small age gap in the future. I'm planning on getting pregnant with the third in January because my body definitely needs a break after having the first 2 so close together! We're using condoms too haha I hope they work!!