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Private school vs state school..not as academic as expected?

59 replies

Checkthisone · 03/05/2023 12:07

Sorry, long post.

DD (5) in Reception has joined a prep school in April. Before then she was going to our local state school.

She is a very happy, easy going child usually and adapts really well to new environments. She couldn't wait to start her state school back in Sept however her confidence started slipping after only a few weeks to the point where she started saying she didn't want to go. This went on for a few months that were really excruciating. We felt like we were losing out otherwise bubbly happy bright child (lots of things happened in that time: being hit and spat on by other kids, shouty put-downy teachers, she stopped engaging in the classroom, always angry at home etc). She hated anything to do with reading or maths, although she was learning and progressing.

Hence, in Jan she had a taster day at her current private school. She loved it. The facilities are amazing, small classrooms, very few behaviour problems. She came home really happy. Ever since then (I'm thinking perhaps she felt like there is an escape from her current school), she started engaging more, confidence went up, became happier and became one of the top readers in her class.

When she left her state school at the end of March the teacher said she was ahead of expectations with her reading and I am aware that the state school was really pushing with the phonics. Every day she'd come with new tricky words, digraphas, longer words and I felt she was like a sponge, really absorbed everything.

Back in Jan at the taster day the private prep mentioned that her writing wasn't quite up to the level of the other girls in the class so she'll need catching up, reading was just OK, making us feel like she was behind and needed a lot of extra support. Obviously she made a lot of progress in the meantime and really loves reading and wants more.

She started her new school just over 2 weeks ago and dissapontingly she has not learned any new words or tricky words or anything to push her up. The books she is given home to read (4 a week) are way below her level, she flies through them in 30 secs. Yesterday she didn't want to to read it, choosing to read a higher level one from the ones we have at home. I've spoken to her teacher last week and said DD finds them quite easy, but I said it's ok for now, good to consolidate the basics. However yesterday she came with an even easier one. I'm feeling really disappointed for DD who is ready for more and feels like she is not learning.

I'm also very surprised to learn that they do a lot less than the state school at phonics?! Of course, they have a broader curriculum (drama, music, sports, French) but can't quite understand why they don't push a little harder with reading at the point. It's meant to be a very academic school. (At the taster day DD told me they were teaching the digraphs that she learned at the state school 2 weeks before).

Can anyone relate to this or has any advice? I'm taking all our books out again and teaching DD further phonics despite paying so much for the private school and I feel a little deflated. DD is very happy there to be fair, feels valued, no shouty teachers and everyone is kind and respectful. Plus she likes the structure and variety of activities so we won't be considering a state school again.

OP posts:
Skybluepinky · 03/05/2023 12:17

If it’s not a selective school the standard won’t necessarily be higher than the state school and could quite easily be lower.

whodawhodaeho · 03/05/2023 12:17

She’s 5. Have you considered just giving her a break??

SoupDragon · 03/05/2023 12:19

She's only been there 2 weeks. They need to get to know her.

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Checkthisone · 03/05/2023 12:20

whodawhodaeho · 03/05/2023 12:17

She’s 5. Have you considered just giving her a break??

She is asking for more!! I'm not pushing her with anything, she loves to read

OP posts:
Checkthisone · 03/05/2023 12:22

Can anyone advice how to teach phonics, any resources?! She wants to read at a higher level but I'm not sure how to support her..English is not my first language

OP posts:
Dodgeitornot · 03/05/2023 12:23

Have you spoken to the school? It may be that they're just trying to be gentle with her as she's just started.

Dixiechickonhols · 03/05/2023 12:23

I wouldn’t assume she was happier because she knew she was escaping that sounds quite a leap with a 4 or 5 yr old. It sounds like she’d settled and found her feet and was enjoying and thriving at state.
You’ve literally just moved her mid yr so it will take time for her to find her feet again.
I’d assume they are assessing her and finding her level it’s only a few weeks into term after Easter hols.
All schools are different and new school won’t be following same national curriculum.
My dc was at a private primary and did phonics in the nursery then was reading well in reception it wasn’t as rigid as we all do this this week.

DoThePropeller · 03/05/2023 12:24

At my kids school I feel like they push them pretty hard in Autumn and Spring terms and summer term is much easier - focused on end of year performance, music recitals, sports day etc.

They are also probably focusing on settling in. I’d give it more than two weeks.

Checkthisone · 03/05/2023 12:25

Dodgeitornot · 03/05/2023 12:23

Have you spoken to the school? It may be that they're just trying to be gentle with her as she's just started.

I had a catch up with her teacher last week , she said she is aware the books they were giving her are a bit below her level, however this week she came with a very basic one again. DD is always saying they are too easy, not sure what to tell her .

OP posts:
Dixiechickonhols · 03/05/2023 12:27

You can read with her without worrying re phonics. Go to Library and let her choose books. Mix of her reading and you reading to her.
It’s a massive change to her world will take time to adjust.

Namechanger355 · 03/05/2023 12:27

Well if you spoke to the teacher who acknowledged that the books are easier - did she say why or did you ask? Surely there is a reason for that? Is it to ensure she has grasped the basics and to evaluate her performance so they can then start pushing her more

there js probably a reason for it ie a method to the supposed madness

CurlewKate · 03/05/2023 12:27

Is there a reason you were expecting the school to be more intellectually rigorous?

Nimbus9000 · 03/05/2023 12:28

It’s only been a couple of weeks. How is her comprehension? It’s very common for young kids to be proficient readers of the words but their actual understanding isn’t up to speed so they get given more simple books to practice comprehension. You could get her some more challenging books from the library but make sure she’s understanding everything.

Dixiechickonhols · 03/05/2023 12:30

Even if book easy you can extend - what think happens next, what word is similar to that one etc.
At this age it’s just getting into habit of reading. Read the school book but then a library book or your own if she’s read the school one quickly.

justprance · 03/05/2023 12:30

What was the previous phonics program that the state school was following and where had your daughter got to?

I often give new kids a bit of time to adapt and I find that parents tend to over estimate their child's abilities. Changing between pedagogies can take time.

It's been two weeks. Ask for another meeting and tell them your expectations.

But in all honesty, I would not be happy that my daughter was feeling comfortable and encouraging her through this adaptation period

KleineDracheKokosnuss · 03/05/2023 12:31

Checkthisone · 03/05/2023 12:22

Can anyone advice how to teach phonics, any resources?! She wants to read at a higher level but I'm not sure how to support her..English is not my first language

Download TeachMonster.it’s great.

FlounderingFruitcake · 03/05/2023 12:31

I would expect it’s about comprehension and the teacher wants to be confident she understands what she’s reading before moving on to harder material. Also it’s only been 2 weeks.

justprance · 03/05/2023 12:32

Ask the new school what their phonics program is

Carmelalefou · 03/05/2023 12:33

They may not be more academic at this stage as they don't do SATS. If she's enjoying the school and has a wide and curriculum then leave her to enjoy it.

Carmelalefou · 03/05/2023 12:34

I thought phonics had been discredited anyway.

Checkthisone · 03/05/2023 12:36

CurlewKate · 03/05/2023 12:27

Is there a reason you were expecting the school to be more intellectually rigorous?

The school has a reputation for being quite academic and the head teacher really pushed that narrative at the open day. She said if the girls are not very academic they'll struggle and that will impact their confidence, therefore parents need to think carefully. I was nervous sending DD there quite honestly but I think DD is quite ahead with both phonics and maths without a lot of input from home, which is very surprising.

Teacher said last week her maths is very strong but her reading is just at the right level with the other girls, but like I said the books are below her reading level. I'm quite confused.

OP posts:
Dixiechickonhols · 03/05/2023 12:40

They probably did info afternoon or emails for new starters re how they teach reading at start in September. Maybe ask for that so you can support her and know their approach.
Different schools have emphasis on different things.
Some choose private as it can be a wider curriculum and less rigid.

Checkthisone · 03/05/2023 12:40

justprance · 03/05/2023 12:32

Ask the new school what their phonics program is

It's the same scheme as the state school...but turns out they are behind. I think the state school really pushed hard with the phonics at this stage so if children were capable they'd learn a lot. I suspect in Y1 the state school will start revising to allow everyone to catch up?

I'm hoping the prep school will start ramping things up in Year 1?

OP posts:
MathsIsFab · 03/05/2023 12:44

Dixiechickonhols · 03/05/2023 12:27

You can read with her without worrying re phonics. Go to Library and let her choose books. Mix of her reading and you reading to her.
It’s a massive change to her world will take time to adjust.

This was the best advise we were given by our school (my kid is in a selective prep); we go to library every week now and get a bunch of books etc

you can’t really expect school to be totally on top of exactly what your kid needs , it’s not 121 tutoring

DS is 3 years ahead in maths but they treat him like an advanced Y3 not like a Y6 if you get my point

Labraradabrador · 03/05/2023 12:50

We also moved ours mid year in reception from state to private, and also found it to be much slower with phonics progression than state. I think some (most?) state schools are laser focused on sats test results, and focus on that at the expense of everything else. The private school is more focused on mastery and extension rather than pushing ahead as fast as possible. Faster is not always better, and from what I can see the year 5/6 students in our private are ahead of their state peers, it is just a different progression. Our school is not overly academic either (more whole child education).

HTH there is no advantage in pushing your child ahead with at home phonics tuition. What you can do is invest in some more interesting books that will supplement school learning- we have had great success with the songbirds series, which loosely aligns with phonics progression. I also have an assortment of chapter books with illustrations (reading Pizazz at the moment) and will sometimes ask mine to read the more comic book pages, so we are reading harder books than they are ready for, but together with mom. Her loving reading and learning is honestly the most important thing.