How much notice of your death do you want? Months? weeks? days? hours?

[Nimbostratus100]

I always think I want months, but actually I am not sure. I think what I want is to be assured it wont be this month, or next month. If I was actually told I only had months left, I would probably be quite upset. But I do want time to prepare.

By prepare, I dont just mean wills and POA etc, which is already in place, I mean shred paperwork, clear wardrobe, etc, not leave a mess behind, although I still want those clothes and paperwork and mess right now

I have known 2 people die mid sentence in normal, cheery, everyday conversations, with no warning. I think it was lovely for them. But they didn't have time to prepare.

So I guess, what I actually want is to be told something like "you probably wont make it to 5 years" so I can get prepared, while still thinking long term and enjoying life, then popping off suddenly, maybe in my sleep, with no warning.

When one of my school friends died of cancer after only being diagnosed a few months earlier, I made a Word document with details of my insurance policies, gas, electricity, mortgage and all passwords for my accounts. Plus bank account details and stocks and investments. DH and kids know this document is on my Surface Pro desktop. What they don't know is it also gives them the location of a personal letter for each of them hand written.

My Mum had the perfect day before she died ,saw her best friend spoke to my daughter at Uni ,held her neighbour new born baby ,cooked supper ,washed up and must have sat down in her conservatory and died suddenly.
Huge shock to us when her friend found her the following day but I am thankful every day that she died how she did and was never scared or in pain and had her dignity.