Bad Restaurant Review - WWYD?

[foodcritic]

NC for this on the off chance someone works out who we are and decides to do someone similar...

We have a small independent restaurant, been established over 10 years, lots of lovely regular customers, and always grateful for new customers. Many of these come due to our good reviews on various sites such as TripAdvisor, Google, etc. Also we do a fair bit (probably weekly) on local community Facebook pages which also attracts new people and reminds existing customers of what we are doing by way of Chef Specials etc.

Last week a Google review went on with 2 stars - and a comment along the lines of 'sad to see xxxxx on the menu'. (xxxx being a dish that some people find unacceptable, others specifically come to our restaurant to eat as it's difficult to find in supermarkets or other restaurants)

There is a name so I know exactly who has written this, and she's a local person who has never eaten at our restaurant. She has on occasion also used a crying emoji when she sees posts for certain dishes on Facebook that i have posted. (Suspect she's not a meat eater)

So - I have responded to the review with a similarly short comment, basically saying how disappointing someone has given a review based not on eating in the restaurant and experiencing our food/service, but based on a specific menu item.

Reviews are so important to small businesses, we can't afford massive advertising campaigns, and although this one hasn't really put a dent in our overall rating it's so frustrating. But I'm now wondering if I shouldn't have responded as I've made us look as petty as her. What would you have done?

Why do you do that all the time… It’s boring . The answer is no it’s not worth it IF that’s how animals get treated … . but it isn’t a case of either you eat meat and the animals get treated like this, or you don’t eat meat is it 🙄🙄

There are lots of good reasons, personal and for wider benefit, for reducing your consumption of meat or other animal products. I've done that, though I am never going to be vegetarian or vegan. What worked with me was a vegan with a similar interest in cooking posting her recipes and me thinking: "That looks really nice."

It wasn't a total win for her in that I will always consume animal products. But it was a small one and what happens is that now I tell people: "Do you know what? This is delicious and also cheap and easy and will help you lose weight and make your heart work better, but above all, it's delicious."

If she'd told me I was going to die of cancer, I'd have blocked her.

Some people will always be mulish about it like people boasting they are going to eat pork after seeing a picture of a pig in a farrowing crate - are farrowing crates used in UK farming? Genuine question.

There was a recent thread on here where someone said she was hosting a dinner party and one person was vegan and what could she serve? Some of us suggested delicious and easy vegan meals everyone would like, but it became clear she just wanted to rant about this guest, so I bowed out. Some people don't want your help even when they pretend they do.

I understand the all or nothing approach because it makes you feel pure. But I believe whittling away, though muddy, has more effect. Smoking is a case in point. If you tell people about the health benefits of not smoking and help them to give up, while making it difficult for smokers through price and restrictions on smoking you end up with a UK average of 13 per cent. I was going to put 15 per cent, which I already thought was very low but I thought I'd and found that figure,

Just telling people they are all going to die of cancer and printing horrible images doesn't.

As I said, you catch more flies with honey than vinegar and only one of those three is vegan.

Lol it really is isn't it.....

She could comment, if she really had to on not liking to see particular dishes on the menu, but giving a two star review, which lowers that businesses rating is darn right spiteful. This is someone’s lively hood !

Then don’t respond, it’s really that simple!

Do what ALL the time? Yours posts have been very boring too, a whole host of defensiveness.
We’ll actually you either pay for the misery and support it, or you don’t 🙄🙄

I’ve seen that approach on a lot of animal rights groups that meat eaters purposely troll, it really doesn’t work, the vegans are abused and mocked, if I have to be honest, humans are just ignorant to it all but often it’s disguised as defensiveness.
The one thing that worked for me was seeing the suffering behind the meat industry, people who eat meat refuse or don’t want to see that, all they see is a piece of meat wrapped in plastic, not what happened from birth to slaughter, the cognitive dissonance is what allows humans to enjoy eating meat without putting any thought into how the meat ended up on their plate. Or maybe they do know but see animals as only food and not sentient beings.

@Coffeeandcake15 I'm a meat eater but I'm not trolling.

The one thing that worked for me was seeing the suffering behind the meat industry

you saw a TV programme (released in 2005) and decided to cut our dairy and meat. As an adult. So grew up and well in to adulthood scoffing meat and dairy presumably

Who said you were trolling?

Like many people who grow up eating meat, they see something, make the connection and make changes. I’ve never once said I didn’t eat meat and dairy in the past.

Okay, discussion point for me. If we all turned vegan. What would happen to all the cows, pigs, sheep etc that currently live in farms?? They have no survival instincts to use, like none. We’ve all seen cows or sheep on roads and things when fences are down. If they are not farmed for their meat, milk, eggs and whatever, what happens to them?? Do they go extinct because they have no purpose in the world? If that is the case then surely veganism would be the catalyst for the extinction of many species of animal and is therefore the opposite of what you’re trying to achieve. Another discussion point, many vegans say that people have a line where pet starts and food source ends. I myself eat meat, I also eat vegan/veggie food when I fancy it. Any animal can be a good source for me, just the same as I could be a food source for something or someone else. If I lived in a country where eating dog, cat or horse was normal, then I would.

No but you came to veganism well in to your adult years

I’ve seen that approach on a lot of animal rights groups that meat eaters purposely troll, it really doesn’t work, the vegans are abused and mocked, if I have to be honest, humans are just ignorant to it all but often it’s disguised as defensiveness.

@Coffeeandcake15 you said this. I've seen vegans (among other people) asked all sorts of stupid questions and whataboutery. But I'm not doing that, and I wanted to make that clear in case you thought that. If I misunderstood and you weren't calling me a troll, then that's all been cleared up.

If by "that approach" you mean the one taken by my vegan friend it has worked to a certain extent because it has got me to cut down my meat consumption. That might not be good enough for you, but that's all anyone is going to get.

Of course, you might not mean that, and I've misunderstood again. It can be difficult to make things clear, can't it?

@DarrellRiversCriminalBehaviourOrder of course I'm not offended, I just don't want to do it. I thought it was cheeky to tell me to start another thread, but if you say it was just a suggestion, then I'll accept that. We're all entitled to make suggestions. I made one to you and you didn't want to do it. That's fair enough.

I'm not trying to fool anyone or paint myself as anything. But if you think that, I can't stop you and wouldn't want to try.

I am not here to stop people eating meat, I’m raising awareness, if that results in people reducing meat/cutting out meat altogether or continuing a meat diet, that’s absolutely up to them. I have absolutely no control over peoples dietary choices but if people have the knowledge then it can mean they’re able to make more ethical choices.

I would respond una similar way that you have. Can you report her comment as a fake one and get it removed ?

I can't understand why, if you want to discuss recipes, you wouldn't want to start a thread dedicated to that rather than further derailing this one. Or why you'd take offence at the suggestion (which you certainly did if you thought it was "cheeky" and an attempt to stop you posting here...wtf).

Of course, if my theory about what you're really doing is correct, then it makes perfect sense.

If you really want to know my favourite meatless recipes, then start a new thread and tag me.

I don't want to start another thread and you don't want to give me your favourite recipe on this one. That's an acceptable position for us both to take.

Yes, I know you don't want to start another thread. Because you aren't interested in recipes, you're interested in deflecting this discussion while attempting to make yourself look so very breezy about it. Which is really coming apart now.

If you ever are interested in what I make for dinner, you know what to do. I respond to good faith requests. Hell, PM me and I'll send you something, snark-free.

Hey! I’ve been trying to follow however missed a fair few of the comments. (Apologies if you already dealt with the post!)

I’m in a global social media team responding to questions, comments, and product & service reviews for 2 massive household name brands as a part of my job. We also engage with social posts good and bad across all platforms, filtering and escalating posts we can’t respond to, or are too sensitive, to higher up departments who deal with crisis topic management. Part of my job is to reply to neg 1-3 star reviews on websites.

Your response translates as somewhat defensive, petulant and unprofessional (sorry!). You could “no response” it but on balance it’s better to reply. And don’t ever say sorry, be ‘concerned to hear’.

Just say “Thanks for taking the time to share your comments, as we appreciate feedback. Your thoughts count, and we are listening”. Miss out the bit about appreciating feedback if you like!

Hope that helps :-) Xx

@DarrellRiversCriminalBehaviourOrder But I am interested in recipes. I follow the Guardian relentlessly and found these two today. I'm going to adapt them both though.

Basically, I'm going to put half an aubergine into the first one because it's left over and I don't have any mung beans and don't want to open another tin of chickpeas.

They are both vegan but as I will be using the last of the dairy yogurt, they will be vegetarian.

I think it will work.

I'm not going to make the bread.

https://www.theguardian.com/food/2023/apr/22/yotam-ottolenghi-indian-vegetarian-feast-recipes-herby-rotis-pea-potato-spinach-curry-aubergine-mung-bean

Nice recipe@limitedperiodonly
ive never looked at guardian recipes before, thanks for the heads up.

@DrPrunesqualler thanks. This is a great one too. I always order this in Indian restaurants but paneer is terrifying calorific and I'm trying to lose weight so I was pleased to find it. Meera Sodha is a good cook to look out for but there are loads of ideas from other people on there.

https://www.theguardian.com/food/2022/jun/25/vegan-matar-tofu-pea-cashew-tofu-curry-recipe-meera-sodha

@Coffeeandcake15 All of what you've said makes sense to me. I've posted some of my favourite vegan or vegetarian recipes but I'm not going to spam the thread from now on because if people want to, they can look things up for themselves, and if they don't, they won't.