Bad Restaurant Review - WWYD?

[foodcritic]

NC for this on the off chance someone works out who we are and decides to do someone similar...

We have a small independent restaurant, been established over 10 years, lots of lovely regular customers, and always grateful for new customers. Many of these come due to our good reviews on various sites such as TripAdvisor, Google, etc. Also we do a fair bit (probably weekly) on local community Facebook pages which also attracts new people and reminds existing customers of what we are doing by way of Chef Specials etc.

Last week a Google review went on with 2 stars - and a comment along the lines of 'sad to see xxxxx on the menu'. (xxxx being a dish that some people find unacceptable, others specifically come to our restaurant to eat as it's difficult to find in supermarkets or other restaurants)

There is a name so I know exactly who has written this, and she's a local person who has never eaten at our restaurant. She has on occasion also used a crying emoji when she sees posts for certain dishes on Facebook that i have posted. (Suspect she's not a meat eater)

So - I have responded to the review with a similarly short comment, basically saying how disappointing someone has given a review based not on eating in the restaurant and experiencing our food/service, but based on a specific menu item.

Reviews are so important to small businesses, we can't afford massive advertising campaigns, and although this one hasn't really put a dent in our overall rating it's so frustrating. But I'm now wondering if I shouldn't have responded as I've made us look as petty as her. What would you have done?

How have I been unpleasant to people?

Continuous use of aggravatory and accusatory language, implying that those of us who disagree are condoning murder and abuse, as well as your continuing use of the term rape.

That word doesn’t merely mean being penetrated, does it? You know that perfectly well. Rape is a sexual act, committed with intent. Your definition would mean that every time a vet does an internal examination on an animal that the vet is committing rape.

Yet with all this emotive, aggressive language, you claim to be stating facts, yet you know almost nothing about animal welfare. I expect your “research” has been watching videos made by other, equally ignorant extremists.

Do you do any work with animals, or try to promote welfare on farms, or do you restrict your activities to not eating meat and using extremist language on the internet?

I'm not talking about 'impressing' anyone. I'm saying that in your posts which you seem to think demonstrate great concern for animal welfare, you are posting stuff which is traumatising and upsetting for the many women here who have been on the receiving end of violent and nonconsensual sexual acts.

@DarrellRiversCriminalBehaviourOrder

That is awful. So petty, so unprofessional, so spiteful

Are you ok? What an absolutely disproportionate response to what the OP actually wrote (which was so much more balanced than your comment here)

I can only assume your agenda is the welfare issue, which is fine, but why don't you own it instead of writing nonsense

I'm fine, thanks for asking. OP wanted to know what we thought of her original response, so I told her. She's taken it down now, which I think was wise.

I thoroughly enjoyed a veal dish in Switzerland and I see no reason why you should remove it from your menu because it’s upset someone. Young calves are used in other ways apart from meat.
You could point out whatever accreditation scheme your supplier has to ensure the animal and then it’s meat has been treated humanely.

anyhow if this person has in the past targeted you on your posts, why not simply block her so she no longer sees them? I’ve done this to one of DD’s former school friends who was forever putting angry emojis on my posts on our community page, for whatever reason she felt she needed to target me… makes life a lot more simple.

If you think me highlighting what happens to animals is traumatic and upsetting, why are you targeting me? I’m not the one who is abusing animals, I’m simply raising awareness.
So I can’t raise the issue of animals being violated because only humans are faced with violent and nonconsensual sexual acts? It’s abhorrent for humans and animals alike.

If you don’t like people raising the issues of animals being routinely violated and murdered, maybe think about how you are contributing to the issues I have raised. The facts I have stated are true and backed up by evidence. Whether you believe it or not, is entirely up to you.
An examination is quite different to forcibly impregnating a cow.
If I was ignorant to what happened to animals, I would still be consuming their flesh.

That must be so annoying and I can see why you replied as you did but I’d have either ignored it or replied with, I’m sorry our menu isn’t to your liking, but we like to have unique dishes and this one happens to be very popular. I hope there is something else to your liking and we can welcome you to our restaurant soon .’ or something similar… kill them with understanding and kindness :)

I’d just like to add that I read some of the comments about meat etc on hour thread and I hope that you take not a blind bit of notice. The aggression and vitriol that some people throw around just shows them up , not you , and while a lot of people do understand the stance of vegans and vegetarians, and many would agree , people like these just make them walk away and not listen at all . Aggressive people don’t win any argument or change the world, they just make themselves look foolish .

People have choices. If she doesn’t like a menu item or has strong beliefs on what you serve in my opinion she shouldn’t eat there. I disagree, I think you should have responded. It’s like me going to a steak restaurant and then moaning they serve steaks?! I appreciate people have different beliefs but you eat what you feel comfortable with and make an informed choice. If you know this person just leave it and if she chooses to eat there again and leaves a negative review just comment on the fact she keeps coming back……. You obviously take pride in what you do and that’s great, don’t let a select few spoil it. People rarely pay attention to the odd bad review. I certainly wouldn’t.

I’d start posting pictures of the most delicious meat products on the menu. Don’t worry about it, I used to have sleepless nights about bad reviews, then I started answering them with wit and sarcasm, my regulars loved it.

Lots of posters seem to think it's possible to humanely murder something, just think about that - you can't humanely kill something that doesn't want to die, it doesn't make sense as a concept.

OP may really want to think about the choice to sell veal and octopus, have you not seen the public outcry that's building steam in opposition to plans for EU octopus farms? I would really recommend watching 'My Octopus Teacher' if you haven't seen it, octopuses are incredibly intelligent, it's believed their cognitive function is very similar to humans.

I used to eat animals, and I know it's really normal to fight against information that is contradictory to your strongly held beliefs and behaviors (which likely follow the way you were raised, most of us were raised eating animals) - it's cognitive dissonance - your brain wants to protect you from information that contradicts your actions - which is why on threads like this there will always be lots of 'oh this vegan is an extremist ignore them ' 'people would listen to their arguments if they were only less aggressive' etc. It's an excuse to not process it. The truth is that animal agriculture is incredibly cruel, and it's hard to 'live and let live' when a part of the population's decision to eat animals results in the daily suffering and death of billions of animals.

This does effect me, every day - and everyone else that is 'awake' to the needless suffering of sentient beings. In this country we have so much choice to eat a rich and varied diet without animal suffering - why not give it a try? Not to mention animal agriculture is destroying the environment, and not even great for your health... so many reasons to try something else.

I note that you ignored my question:

Do you do any work with animals, or try to promote welfare on farms, or do you restrict your activities to not eating meat and using extremist language on the internet?

Of course you don’t do anything to promote animal welfare. You enjoy bullying people from your place of ignorance and insensitivity towards human beings, while feeling a sense of misplaced moral superiority.

You have not raised a single fact, merely thrown out accusations.

Go well.

We shall agree to disagree but I think you’ll find your posts towards me are the aggressive ones and full of accusatory comments and assumptions, I no longer wish to engage with you.

Go well now.

Oh sorry wrong thread 😊

The OP said that this person has never eaten at the restaurant but left a review anyway :-(

I think I’m in the minority, but harming a business’s rating because you don’t like something on the menu is not okay. If you don’t like something for personal reasons, because your morals are your morals, and you cannot speak for others, is fine. It is not your responsibility to police the morals of others.

And the fish farms, seafood farms.... Maybe they are low IQ enough?

Or the conditions of Danish bacon, and the mass killing of day old male chick's the egg industry.