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Original poster

Do you ever get a strange feeling about someone ( or something?)

347 replies

Trixiefirecracker · 12/04/2023 22:11

I recently met someone, just a friend of a friend, and had a really visceral gut feeling about her and not in a good way. It made me feel so uncomfortable and I felt really awkward around her, like she might know what I was thinking. I have no idea why this happened and has never happened before, there was no obvious reason for it. She was perfect polite. However It felt like all the hairs stood up on the back of my neck and something about her really rattled me.Has anyone else ever had this experience and were they ‘right’ about their gut feeling?

OP posts:
Theydontknowanything · 13/04/2023 00:24

Worked in jobs that attract paedophiles. Always had a bad feeling around one man and so did some colleagues but we never had any evidence or even reportable suspicions. There was just something off about him that gave us that bad feeling. Then he was arrested at work in relation to offences in his private life.

Trez1510 · 13/04/2023 00:24

I've been on the opposite side of this. I once went on a night out with my best friend, a colleague from work and her friend.

It was obvious from our first introduction my colleague's friend really (probably viscerally) disliked me.

I felt it but didn't say anything. My friend, though, was baffled and asked me if I knew the colleague's friend? If we had history or anything? My friend said it was unlike anything she'd ever witnessed - raw hatred she called it.

I consoled myself with the thought perhaps I looked like the woman for whom her husband / partner had dumped her. 😜

It was certainly a bizarre experience.

mamabear715 · 13/04/2023 00:33

I didn't like being around two separate customers who shopped where I worked. They both ended up being murdered.. like part of me KNEW?

Charles11 · 13/04/2023 00:43

Feelings about people actually fascinate me. Why do you feel an attraction to someone? It's sometimes a stranger from afar and it's nothing to do with pheromones or the sound of their voice but just something that you can't put your finger on but it's there and it's real.
I believe you can have those instincts and feelings in a negative way too and pick up in something that repels you.

I've felt it a few times but I can't say it was justified. I met someone who later murdered his wife and killed himself but I thought he was very friendly and pleasant. So my instincts aren't quite that attuned.

GarlicGrace · 13/04/2023 00:45

It's picking up on cues that your brain considers odd behaviour. Mostly very, very subtle things which is why your conscious self doesn't see it. Your subconscious is screaming at you

What @bottleofbeer said. 99% of the time, steering clear of that person will not impact your life very much, so you may as well. The other 1% of the time is when Mumsnet's many strategies for polite boundary-setting come in handy!

I pick up on moods & mannerisms very easily. I'm not infallible, but my upbringing made me hyper-vigilant and this is one part of the legacy I don't mind having. Those who know me well tend to trust my instincts.

bottleofbeer · 13/04/2023 00:48

You're attracted to people because you're likely to make attractive, healthy babies.

Soz, that's properly sad 😁

PippaF2 · 13/04/2023 00:49

I've had this. My intuition I would say is pretty good.

On a lesser degree (compared to getting serial killer vibes from someone) and more on the level of - I think this person is just a bit of a prick/fake/not very nice/bitchy - sometimes I wonder if it's a sort of self-fulfilling thing. I get it at work a lot and I end up being guarded and then the person says something cutting/something happens and then it's like - well was that my fault because I took an almost instant dislike? Or does my gut warn me? Hard to know.

GarlicGrace · 13/04/2023 00:50

bottleofbeer · 13/04/2023 00:48

You're attracted to people because you're likely to make attractive, healthy babies.

Soz, that's properly sad 😁

And you snog them because your immune system's assessing their enzymes & bacteria for elements that might benefit your offspring!

Also sad, but kind of cool too Grin

bottleofbeer · 13/04/2023 00:51

Garlic, that's it.

It's all just chemistry.

Charles11 · 13/04/2023 00:52

bottleofbeer · 13/04/2023 00:48

You're attracted to people because you're likely to make attractive, healthy babies.

Soz, that's properly sad 😁

But that's not always true though?
And how do you know if you see them across a train and they're not even your usual 'type'?

bottleofbeer · 13/04/2023 00:53

They're not your usual type?

Well, because their gene pool will work well with yours?

Charles11 · 13/04/2023 00:54

...and you could have healthy attractive babies with millions of people but you wouldn't be attracted to all of them.

Sorry op, sending your thread off on a tangent.

TheFormidableMrsC · 13/04/2023 00:55

23 years ago my brother employed somebody in an admin role in his company. The moment I met her the reaction in me was visceral. An intense dislike and unease that I'd never felt about anybody before (or since). She was perfectly friendly and polite but had dead shark eyes and her smile didn't reach them. I went out of my way to avoid her because of how she made me feel. Our Mum felt exactly the same about her I subsequently found out. I was quite glad when my brother said she was leaving a couple of years later.

10 years on in 2013, my husband walked out on me and our toddler completely out of the blue. Took a couple of weeks for it to come out of the woodwork, but he'd moved in with the very same woman. She turned on me immediately and made my life an utter misery. She has been abusive to my son. She is utterly vile, a malignant narcissist and as a result of her controlling and jealous nature, my son no longer has a father. She made my ex cut off contact with our son when I was diagnosed with cancer as she didn't want him helping me while I was ill. He's a weak man and went along with it so equally to blame. She has also been horribly abusive to other people and has been abusive towards animals.

The moment I set eyes on her I knew she was bad news. I hope we never cross paths with either of them again and now they have moved very far away, I wonder how many people she will hurt there. I always listen to my gut now!

bottleofbeer · 13/04/2023 01:00

That's true but we're also programmed to find the smell of close relatives repulsive. Not like you're going to puke if you stand next to them but their pheromones.

It's to stop us procreating with them. I ironed a shirt for my brother and although he is very clean I could smell 'him' and it was horrible.

No idea why close relatives who meet in later life often fancy each other, goes right against what I just said.

Pregnant with my daughter? The smell of my husband was horrific. Couldn't go near him. I had a previa, which could have gone if I had sex. My body was preventing me wanting sex by making me find my husband's natural scent, repulsive. Clever, really.

MyLoveIsYourLove0xO · 13/04/2023 01:02

TheFormidableMrsC · 13/04/2023 00:55

23 years ago my brother employed somebody in an admin role in his company. The moment I met her the reaction in me was visceral. An intense dislike and unease that I'd never felt about anybody before (or since). She was perfectly friendly and polite but had dead shark eyes and her smile didn't reach them. I went out of my way to avoid her because of how she made me feel. Our Mum felt exactly the same about her I subsequently found out. I was quite glad when my brother said she was leaving a couple of years later.

10 years on in 2013, my husband walked out on me and our toddler completely out of the blue. Took a couple of weeks for it to come out of the woodwork, but he'd moved in with the very same woman. She turned on me immediately and made my life an utter misery. She has been abusive to my son. She is utterly vile, a malignant narcissist and as a result of her controlling and jealous nature, my son no longer has a father. She made my ex cut off contact with our son when I was diagnosed with cancer as she didn't want him helping me while I was ill. He's a weak man and went along with it so equally to blame. She has also been horribly abusive to other people and has been abusive towards animals.

The moment I set eyes on her I knew she was bad news. I hope we never cross paths with either of them again and now they have moved very far away, I wonder how many people she will hurt there. I always listen to my gut now!

That's awful for you and your son!
Flowers

PlinkPlonkFizz · 13/04/2023 01:04

Yes. You should heed the feeling. I hated a friend of a friend in college, he made my skin crawl. He's since been convicted three times of viewing thousands of images of CSA.

Another time I felt there was something very sinister about a friend's Dad. Same thing.

bottleofbeer · 13/04/2023 01:04

You were picking up on cues that she had zero respect for you and fancied your husband.

TheFormidableMrsC · 13/04/2023 01:08

bottleofbeer · 13/04/2023 01:04

You were picking up on cues that she had zero respect for you and fancied your husband.

If that was in response to my post, yes you're probably right although I genuinely didn't realise that at the time. It was just a horrible feeling. I get on with everybody, I've got no enemies and I was surprised at myself. The real loser in all of this is my little lad. It's a tragedy his father can't see that!

randomusername2019 · 13/04/2023 01:10

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bottleofbeer · 13/04/2023 01:10

That horrible feeling was your brain picking up on the cues subconsciously.

Always listen to them x

Notsurenotquiteright · 13/04/2023 01:14

Maybe you meet this person in every life.
and you recognise her soul, but she wronged you.

bottleofbeer · 13/04/2023 01:15

I do advocate this quite strongly because there is a misconception that it's woo shit.

It's not. Your brain is constantly at work, protecting you but it's subconsciously because we have to 'dump' most of what we see and do etc... we couldn't function if we were aware of everything.

Hawkins003 · 13/04/2023 01:17

Sometimes and at times it's a mix of weather I was correct or not,

Namechangeagainx · 13/04/2023 01:22

I'm autistic and sometimes I notice, especially with DC who don't mask like I do, holding people's eye contact for a bit too long or failing another social cue can make people uncomfortable like in your post. Our brains naturally notice the difference and can perceive neurodivergence as a threat

bottleofbeer · 13/04/2023 01:31

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