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Original poster

Am I wrong in feeling that if you came across an older teenage girl unconscious on the pavement you should stop and help her?

125 replies

erikbloodaxe · 02/04/2023 08:43

Because no one else wanted to help me help her and one woman even said her dog (she was walking it at the time) wouldn't want to wait.

OP posts:
IForgotMyUsernameAgain · 02/04/2023 20:41

I've called an ambulance for an elderly man who was also drunk and lying in the street in the middle of the day. A young teenage girl got there before me and was trying to work out what to do when I arrived. I waited until the paramedics arrived.

I've also walked past someone who obviously needs help, but already had people with them, as I'm not sure what else I would be able to add?

MyStarBoy · 02/04/2023 20:47

You did the right thing and thank god there are still good people like you in this selfish world we now live in.

HarrietStyles · 02/04/2023 20:55

I would help anyone, of any age, or gender, if I found them unconscious or in pain. I have done before on numerous occasions. It shocks me how many people are able to walk by without giving a shit. I once helped a lady who collapsed in the entrance of a supermarket, looked after her until an ambulance came. She very sadly died…… and people were actually stepping around and over her body to get to the kiosk to buy fags and lottery tickets. It was absolutely disgraceful.

Cicily · 02/04/2023 20:59

I’ve helped quite a few people laid out on the floor, plenty of people walking past, one was 6pm a woman face down on pavement in work clothes, one old couple actually stepped over her. Another a guy had an epileptic fit and on floor. Same thing, walk on by. I could never do that. DP has gotten annoyed with me when I recount these and more as he says you don’t know what’s happened but I just can’t walk by.

DiscoBeat · 02/04/2023 21:04

I would help anyone unconscious on the street. I can't believe anyone wouldn't!

Headoutofplace · 02/04/2023 21:09

Can't believe the amount of people who wouldn't help from these stories, really sad state of society now. I can completely understand someone not getting 100% involved, eg if it's late at night and you're alone or it's a young woman and you've got no witnesses etc but even then you can call for help and make sure the person gets helped

GobbieMaggie · 02/04/2023 21:09

Brefugee · 02/04/2023 11:39

Lots of people stopped to stare. Not one single person helped

you hand out jobs in a command voice, which i have had to do on occasion. So "you in the yellow coat, call an ambulance" and "you with the red hat, stop people staring/filming"
you would be surprised how well that works.
I have done a LOT of first aid courses and this is what they teach you
first priority: don't put yourself or anyone else in danger
second: rope bystanders in, or coordinate helpers who volunteer

Wouldn’t work in large parts of London : language barriers, cultural differences and a lot of ppl would simply ignore you.

I work in NHS, Central London and have dealt with this sort of thing for years - ppl will call the Police and walk on by, especially when it involves drunks/alcohols and drug addicts.

As a young nurse in A&E I lost count of the times I was punched and kicked by drunks, not to mention the piss and vomit, which I guess is why general public avoid getting involved.

Drug addicts and MH can be unpredictable too, dangerously so at times.

And everyone is aware of knife crime in London.

It’s the way it is.

ImSweetEnoughDarlin · 02/04/2023 21:10

EliflurtleTripanInfinite · 02/04/2023 10:01

I'd stop for an unconcious person of any age or sex at least during the day, I'd be wary in an unlit area at night. A woman was attacked where I grew up by a man faking unconsciousness at night on the side of a country road. No sure I could get past that fear, in that circumstance I'd phone for help, hard to say If Id get out unless injury was very obvious. We all want to say we'll help but statistically some people on Mumsnet wouldn't, I expect it's unlikely they'd be honest with themselves about that. I have stopped a couple of times to help injured animals and had others stop to assist when one needed to be restrained till a ranger arrived.

I'd admit I wouldn't stop and get out my car in certain situations.

There was a warning going around before about what looked like an unattended baby in a car seat in the middle of the street, or a kid with a in of paper with an address on it. When women tried to help, they were attacked/raped.

I'd risk assess before deciding what to do and stopping and getting involved isn't a given.

I may physically help, call the police from my car/a distance or keep on going depending on how dodgy the situation looked.

Viviennemary · 02/04/2023 21:11

I might not these days. In case it was some sort of scam. And I don't know much about first aid. I would help an old person.

LobsterTails · 02/04/2023 21:19

I would definitely stop. Have you seen the programme about Libby Squire?

Pringleface · 02/04/2023 21:23

I do a volunteer type activity which has a uniform. I was on my way home from an event when I was stopped by a woman who pointed out a man lying on the ground unconscious near where we were with the words, ‘I’ve just seen him but I called my dad and he said not to get involved so I’ll leave it with you, thanxbai!’ We’re in an area where it’s not common to see someone just lying by the path.

It was a homeless man who was suffering severe dehydration and hypothermia. It turned out he’d been there for about four hours in winter. Numerous people had walked and driven past him but ignored him. The paramedic who attended said that the man was probably within a couple of hours of dying and I’d saved his life.

Got to say, this was something that took me a while to process. So yes, I would stop and help someone passed out on the pavement.

MouseKeys · 02/04/2023 21:23

I’ve stopped many times to help people who are ill/have fallen in the street and will do so again if I need to. When I worked in a bar I used to patch up people who hurt themselves, got into a fight, or had had too much to drink regularly, walking random drunk girls home sometimes or getting one of my trusted regulars to do it.

One time my husband and I were coming out of the airport and saw a guy staggering around the car park trying to start a motorbike which kept falling over because he couldn’t hold it up. My husband thought he was drunk and wanted to call the police but I wasn’t sure so we went over to check and it turned out he was scared of flying, had taken a Valium on the plane to calm him down and was now trying to drive home on his motorbike completely spaced out. We took his keys away and sorted him out with a ride home instead, hopefully he won’t try that particular trick again in the future!

poundshoptealights · 02/04/2023 21:34

God, of course you stop. Some of the stories here are so depressing. Well done to those who have stepped up.

Marleymoo42 · 02/04/2023 21:48

Not on the same level as this but sort of sums up same attitude of people. I was cycling in a city park with my children. Lots of people and families around. Everyone looking happy and friendly. Older son came off his bike awkwardly, bike was on him, leg trapped, he was screaming. I was a little way behind with a toddler on the back of my bike. Getting off with toddler in the seat slowed me down. Had to balance the bike, unbuckle the toddler, lift child down, run to screaming son. In that time no one helped older son by lifting bike off him. Tons of people walked past and it was obvious he was with me and I was trying to get him. About 20 people just walked around him and ignored him. I found the whole experience so depressing. Surely it's human instinct to help someone up!

Littleoxforddictionary · 02/04/2023 21:55

Marleymoo42 · 02/04/2023 21:48

Not on the same level as this but sort of sums up same attitude of people. I was cycling in a city park with my children. Lots of people and families around. Everyone looking happy and friendly. Older son came off his bike awkwardly, bike was on him, leg trapped, he was screaming. I was a little way behind with a toddler on the back of my bike. Getting off with toddler in the seat slowed me down. Had to balance the bike, unbuckle the toddler, lift child down, run to screaming son. In that time no one helped older son by lifting bike off him. Tons of people walked past and it was obvious he was with me and I was trying to get him. About 20 people just walked around him and ignored him. I found the whole experience so depressing. Surely it's human instinct to help someone up!

Both my children would have been/ were extremely uncomfortable and embarrassed if helped by a stranger even if in need. It does make me think twice about approaching small children in most situations as I know mine would have hated it.

PinkSyCo · 02/04/2023 21:59

Weird question. You would help any person in that state, no matter their age or gender, wouldn’t you?

RomeoOscar · 02/04/2023 22:11

One of my earlier memories is being with my mum in a busy city centre. She had a seizure, 2 small children with her (I was one). We were crying and people literally stepped over her body and ignored us.

I never, ever ignore anyone.

RomeoOscar · 02/04/2023 22:17

This was the early 80s. To give it some context.

Every time I walk past that same spot in the street I'm transported back to that terrified child for an instant.

It was the middle of the day. Not somewhere where there has been a lot of crime. Someone should have stopped to help.

MotherOfCrocodiles · 02/04/2023 22:18

I stopped to help a 85 year old man last year
Who had slipped on ice

Was asking people for about 20 min before anyone gave any meaningful help

Ambulance- forget it- he would have frozen to death before anyone came

Horrible!

TruthsAndALie · 02/04/2023 22:18

erikbloodaxe · 02/04/2023 09:05

To cut a very long story short she was 17, blind drunk at 4pm. I called an ambulance, told 4-7 hrs, so called police. I was on my way to collect DP and couldn't get hold of him to explain. Two teenage boys agreed to stay until the police or I got there. Went back with DP, at this point she had pulled her bottoms/pants down and had her legs in the air. People had their phones out. It was fucking sickening. I covered her with a picnic blanket from the car and called the police again and insisted they come. She was so vulnerable. When the police came she was known to them. 17, blind drunk, exposing herself. So bloody sad.

Well done OP. That is terrible, I would have totally stopped and have helped someone who needed an ambulance before. I got there first to a man who was having a seizure/heart attack and then stopped breathing whilst we were putting him in recovery position as I recall. His wife called the ambulance and luckily another person stopped with medical training and started to perform CPR.

I was quite shaken up afterwards and consider myself cool in a crisis. It was the not knowing what happened to them and playing things over in my mind.

bearfood · 02/04/2023 22:20

@MoonOverBroadway same, my 18 year old has T1 and I also live in fear of him having a hypo in public. When he was first diagnosed his head of year helpfully told me they had noticed he had been spaced out at school and not himself but they just thought he was smoking weed.

Phoebo · 02/04/2023 22:21

If she was obviously drunk then I can see why people left her. But in any other circumstances I would expect people to help

Toddlerteaplease · 02/04/2023 22:25

Not just on the street, I came out if a lift in my hospital and could hear screaming. A Woman, clearly in very advanced labour, clinging on to her partner, and completely unable to move. On the lobby area between the main doors. Absolutely loads of people strong but no one stopped to see if hey could do anything. (I ran to delivery suite just round the corner and grabbed a midwife with a wheelchair.)

Toddlerteaplease · 02/04/2023 22:26

As a PP said, rescue breaths are no longer taught in first aid courses anymore.

Exl · 02/04/2023 22:29

I fainted at a station once. Awoke lying down on platform in a puddle of rain.

Of the forty or so people there, no one glanced at me or asked if I was ok as I struggled to get up. Depressing.