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Original poster

Am I wrong in feeling that if you came across an older teenage girl unconscious on the pavement you should stop and help her?

125 replies

erikbloodaxe · 02/04/2023 08:43

Because no one else wanted to help me help her and one woman even said her dog (she was walking it at the time) wouldn't want to wait.

OP posts:
TherapistInATabard · 02/04/2023 09:41

How do you know she pulled her own pants down? You left her with two teenage boys!

Comedycook · 02/04/2023 09:45

I'd definitely help in that situation. People are so selfish and self absorbed nowadays.

Not quite as dramatic but a while ago when my dc were small, I slipped on some wet leaves and fell hard onto the pavement. A woman turned round, looked at me and turned away. Didn't even ask if I was ok. I was obviously not a drunk or drug addict or someone you could potentially be nervous around. I had my two young DC with me.

MyriadOfTravels · 02/04/2023 09:45

Yes ‘people’ being worried of being under attack if they come and help is very real.
But somehow ‘people’ have no issue staring and filming the same scene. (And posting/sharing too?).

i just think ‘people’ have just become more and more selfish.

Thank you @erikbloodaxe for stopping and helping her. And thank you to the 2 teens that stayed with you and your DP too.

PortiasBiscuit · 02/04/2023 09:48

Thank heavens people do! my DD was helped by a dear, dear woman (bless her forever) after an underage drinking spree in Liverpool. We ended up in Alderhey. DD was 14yo, but had convinced a bartender that she was 19 and she looked it.

This was literally the worst day of my life, I still have severe trauma when I think of what might have happened; if some Angel had not stopped, given my girl her sweatshirt, called an ambulance and then called me.
If she is on MN, you are my total, total hero, I still have your sweatshirt if you would like it back.

MyriadOfTravels · 02/04/2023 09:49

TherapistInATabard · 02/04/2023 09:41

How do you know she pulled her own pants down? You left her with two teenage boys!

👏👏👏👏👏

And here we go.

Because obviously 2 teenage boys would have been able to put her pants down when she was so drunk, with so few issues that no one would have noticed.
They we’re in the street! Nit in a back alley hidden from everyone else! Do you REALLY think people wouldn’t have seen that happening? And that anyone in their own mind would have tried in front if many witnesses - you know the ones who walked past Wo helping and those who took their camera out and would have taken great delight in filing it all.

fgs

User339406 · 02/04/2023 09:55

I helped an older man who had fallen in the street once. Turns out he had dementia and had been trying to get into the office he worked at years ago. He wasn't hurt, I managed to help him up. There were at least 4 able bodied healthy-looking people standing at the bus stop next to us and not one of them offered to help me. He had a bracelet thing with a phone number on it which I called and his wife came to get him.

Twopoodlesarebetterthanone · 02/04/2023 09:56

WTF does the previous poster think teenage boys are - sub human???! Angry

EliflurtleTripanInfinite · 02/04/2023 10:01

I'd stop for an unconcious person of any age or sex at least during the day, I'd be wary in an unlit area at night. A woman was attacked where I grew up by a man faking unconsciousness at night on the side of a country road. No sure I could get past that fear, in that circumstance I'd phone for help, hard to say If Id get out unless injury was very obvious. We all want to say we'll help but statistically some people on Mumsnet wouldn't, I expect it's unlikely they'd be honest with themselves about that. I have stopped a couple of times to help injured animals and had others stop to assist when one needed to be restrained till a ranger arrived.

teacakie · 02/04/2023 10:01

pompomdaisy · 02/04/2023 08:50

My daughter has panic disorder and looks like she is fitting. One person called an ambulance when it happened but never went over to her just called from their house. Very odd!

This is all I would be able to do. I am autistic and I could call for help but would never be able to approach anyone and even if I did I would not be able to speak.

Im sorry but I would just do my best, even if you think that's odd.

BrimFullOfAsher · 02/04/2023 10:01

I personally would have helped yes.

But I do think you have to be extremely careful nowadays. Especially if it's the opposite sex and/or drugs/alcohol are involved.

magicstar1 · 02/04/2023 10:02

I have helped in the past and would again.

My friend was on a night out and saw a girl so drunk she couldn’t stand out on the street. Four guys went over and picked her up, and went to put her in a taxi with them. My friend ran over with her husband and his friends, and got her away from them. There was a bit of a scuffle, and the men left. They got the girl home and the next day she rang to thank my friend. She had been spiked, didn’t know the men, and was terrified to think what could have happened.

Crabo · 02/04/2023 10:04

Of course, although the days of the Good Samaritan appear to be numbered

hopsalong · 02/04/2023 10:13

OP, very glad you were there to help. And those teenage boys were great too. They must have been pretty uncomfortable with the whole situation, and couldn't have been unaware of the risk of the situation being misunderstood in your absence.

I've seen people not bothering to stop in London twice recently when a cyclist has been hit by a car.

In one case even the car didn't stop. A man already out for a run absolutely belted it down the pavement and started banging on the windows. The driver was a woman about my age who claimed she hadn't noticed driving into the cyclist at the roundabout. (She had been going very slowly and clipped him from the side, so despite flying through the air and a lot of blood from his nose he was basically OK.)

Bananananas · 02/04/2023 10:20

I would like to think I'd stop and help. I know my own teen has stopped and attended to an incapacitated adult before so I'd hope the favour would be returned.

It's sickening that more people would rather reach for their phones than stop and help.

kittensinthekitchen · 02/04/2023 10:28

I once was in a taxi when I spotted someone lying on the pavement and asked the driver to stop. I had seen others on the street who must have passed them and not stopped to check/help.

Unfortunately they had already died. When the police came to see me later for a statement, they shared a thank you from the family. I didn't want to know if they could have been saved had someone stopped.

kittensinthekitchen · 02/04/2023 10:32

I also once had a drink spiked, and ended up turfed out the pub onto the (busy) street when it closed.
A passerby called an ambulance. I've never been able to thank him for being the person he is, rather than the person he could have been, but am grateful.

drpet49 · 02/04/2023 10:34

erikbloodaxe · 02/04/2023 09:05

To cut a very long story short she was 17, blind drunk at 4pm. I called an ambulance, told 4-7 hrs, so called police. I was on my way to collect DP and couldn't get hold of him to explain. Two teenage boys agreed to stay until the police or I got there. Went back with DP, at this point she had pulled her bottoms/pants down and had her legs in the air. People had their phones out. It was fucking sickening. I covered her with a picnic blanket from the car and called the police again and insisted they come. She was so vulnerable. When the police came she was known to them. 17, blind drunk, exposing herself. So bloody sad.

Police are probably fed up attending minors who regularly get drunk. I don’t blame them.

RunningFromInsanity · 02/04/2023 10:34

TherapistInATabard · 02/04/2023 09:41

How do you know she pulled her own pants down? You left her with two teenage boys!

I think this perfectly explains why most men might not feel
comfortable stopping to help…

Reinventinganna · 02/04/2023 10:35

RunningFromInsanity · 02/04/2023 10:34

I think this perfectly explains why most men might not feel
comfortable stopping to help…

Show quote history

Exactly

HotPenguin · 02/04/2023 10:37

I think sometimes people panic in an unusual situation. I was once carrying an injured child to get medical attention, I stopped a group of adults out walking and they wouldn't help.

But I've also had a couple of accidents myself where strangers have stepped in and helped me.

What I do think is disgusting is when people take videos/photos. I recently saw a video on Facebook of sheep escaping a field near me on to a road. There were three people filming, not one was trying to stop the sheep or ring the farmer/police.

chanceofpear · 02/04/2023 10:49

Poor girl.

Abergale · 02/04/2023 10:51

I’ve done similar for a teenage girl op. Lots of people helped so it’s not always bad.

Twoshoesnewshoes · 02/04/2023 10:56

I hope I would have helped.
however, I work in a city with a fair number of rough sleepers. I walk past people in doorways several times a day. Some look asleep but who knows?
should I stop and check on everyone? It’s not something I would choose to do. I do buy food etc, but if I stayed with people, called the police etc it would be a full time job.

mydogisthebest · 02/04/2023 10:58

I would stop and see if I could help in any way. Have no medical knowledge though so not sure I could help much.

I think it is bad that so many people don't stop but absolutely disgusting that some take photos. What the hell is the matter with people

EBearhug · 02/04/2023 11:05

Wtf is wrong with people?! Of course I would and people should stop and help. I honestly think Covid has got a lot tk answer for.

It's not covid. I ended up on the floor in a tube carriage once (I was starting to faint, so sat down before I collapsed) and people just stepped over me. One or two tutted. No one asked if I was okay. That was mid-'90s.

I did a first aid refresher last year. They pointed out rescue breaths were always at the discretion of the first aider, because there could be blood, broken jaw or neck, acid or other unknown substances - possible covid is just one more thing in the list of reasons why you might choose not to give rescue breaths.

I'd stop, because I have in the past.