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What’s your gut reaction to a 38 year old being pregnant?

918 replies

Pegfriedrice · 01/03/2023 09:25

Do you consider 38 old to be having a baby? Just interested in how people honestly feel hearing it as obviously most people would be polite in person but I’m not sure if secretly they’d think it was quite old to be having a baby?

probably overthinking but hey…

OP posts:
HeavenIsAHalfpipe · 01/03/2023 18:08

Hmmm, wouldn't be for me, but it's not VERY old. A little bit on the top end of the oldest age to have a baby, but not awfully old. (IMO.)

33-34 would have been the oldest for me personally. And 40 should be the oldest age anyone has a baby (man or woman.) JMHO, no offence intended. Just answering the OP's question, and I know everyone has different circumstances.

NoClueForAName · 01/03/2023 18:08

I wouldn’t even think about it. I had my first at 35, second at 37 and third at 40. Didn’t feel old and don’t think it’s particularly out of the normal You’re overthinking it.

AntiStuff · 01/03/2023 18:08

I would think, that's nice, and say congratulations.

I was 40 when I had my dd, my mum was 40 when she had me, my sil was 42 when she had my dn. My rest of my NCT group (London) were late thirties, plus me and one other, who was 42.

Not sure why 38 would be considered in any way worthy of comment these days!

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Picoloangel · 01/03/2023 18:09

My reaction would be congratulations. I was 44 when I had DD and have lived every minute - not a career or life style choice, a lot of miscarriages. Motherhood can be right or wrong at any age but it’s definitely been right for me.

Shellyth · 01/03/2023 18:09

I wouldn’t think anything, who knows what her journey has been. She may have been trying for years and years. Good luck to her x

Gremlins101 · 01/03/2023 18:10

Everyone: What is an NCT?

OP: wouldn't think anything of it. It's normal.

MargeS · 01/03/2023 18:10

I was 33 and 38 when I had my daughters. I would have had them earlier but circumstances didn’t allow. I am 52 now with an 18 year old and a 14 year old and it’s fine. Certainly go for it if that’s what you want, it’s not too old at all. Ignore your sister.

Toomuchtrouble4me · 01/03/2023 18:11

Normal - but then I’m a southerner.

Essie274 · 01/03/2023 18:11

I did NCT as a 21 year old first time mum, the second youngest parent there was 31 - the eldest was 45yo (making me closer in age to my unborn baby than them, ha). I definitely felt more in the minority having children in my 20s and even though I know the range of ages than women commonly have children is huge and I don't judge at all - my instant "normal"age range is anything in their 30s.

cowzen · 01/03/2023 18:11

Totally normal where I live.

I can think of several mums in DCs primary school that are in their 50s

ImagineImagine · 01/03/2023 18:11

I had my 3rd a few days before my 40th birthday. Don’t over think it, if you want a baby and feel well and able then go for it! ☘️

DrSamuelBeckett · 01/03/2023 18:11

Ah bless you - I had my 3 aged 34 - 39. Can't imagine having had them any earlier and definitely didn't feel old to be having children. I think people tend to fall into 2 camps - aiming to have them early twenties or mid 30s and whichever camp you are in, the other camp is difficult to imagine. I had the best twenties and early 30s and would be pro my children enjoying a career and fun before having children too.

thankyouforthesun · 01/03/2023 18:12

If it was me I would be really upset because I have enough children.
If it's someone else then as long as it's what they want then I'm happy for them.

Mba1974 · 01/03/2023 18:12

35 when I had mine and I’m right in the middle of the mums age group of my daughters friends many had theirs at 38 or later so wouldn’t think it was odd at all. Honestly, we’re all financially secure in our own rights, have lived well and hard before children, are too old to take any bollocks from anyone including our children, happy in our skins, have raised confident, sensible, fun, strong teens and have had interesting lives. Not saying at all that you can’t have/be those things if you have kids young can only reference my experience but observationally from my group of friends I’ve seen no downsides and plenty of upsides.

JoJo10 · 01/03/2023 18:13

I had my 2nd at 37, 3rd at 41 so seems completely normal to me.

jwoo23 · 01/03/2023 18:13

Congratulations would be my first thought. You never know how long someone might have been trying for. Even if it is a second child!!

mamamamamamamamamamachameleon · 01/03/2023 18:13

Um....mine would be "well done!" Had mine at (just under) 38 and 41. You spend years trying not to get pregnant and then when you finally want to, nobody tells you how hard it is to actually conceive!

NazMedusa · 01/03/2023 18:14

Completely normal. Had my first child at 27, and had my third child at 38. I still feel like I'm 25!

MrsSlocombesCat · 01/03/2023 18:15

Isn’t thirties the norm for having a baby?

Cranarc · 01/03/2023 18:15

I would think it to be on the old side for a first pregnancy. Not for a subsequent. But whatever the situation, none of my business except to be happy for the parents and to hope all goes smoothly.

Frodshaw · 01/03/2023 18:15

Totally normal. My wife was 47 when she had our first (and last) child. We were warmly congratulated by all we knew. Enjoy the moments and relish being an older parent as it brings all kinds of blessings.

Jumpingthruhoops · 01/03/2023 18:15

My gut reaction would be to think: 'That's wonderful news'.

Beyond that, it's literally none of my business what someone else decides to do with their uterus 🤷🏼‍♀️

JavanDawns · 01/03/2023 18:16

"Congratulations, I'm so happy for them, what exciting news" would probably be my main reactions tbh

Many NHS trusts have changed their geriatric pregnancy criteria to over age 40 now as it's more recognised that underlying health conditions have more impact than simply age alone on most risk factors. E.g. a 38 year old who is fit, healthy and running marathons will likely have a less risky pregnancy than a younger person who is overweight and has a poor diet or other existing health issues

Times have changed, we all need to keep up and be much more supportive of mums in their late 30s

MajorCarolDanvers · 01/03/2023 18:16

Well that's the age I was when I had my last baby so I really wouldn't think anything of it.

MrsCarson · 01/03/2023 18:17

I'd think, Congratulations