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Original poster

When visiting someone’s house - do you read greetings cards?

151 replies

Username24680 · 18/02/2023 21:31

You pop in to visit someone - there are cards sitting on display (Valentines on this occasion). Would it enter your mind to go and read the cards?

OP posts:
Renoir56 · 19/02/2023 08:06

I'm the least nosey person in the world but I do this! It's something I've grown up seeing family do so it never occurred to me not to do it. Only with family or close friends though and I would do it with birthday cards but not valentines cards. Maybe it's a generational thing as I'm in my 50s and the people mentioned on here who do it seem to be mostly mums and MILs.

I'm now mortified at the thought of it.

Renoir56 · 19/02/2023 08:08

ThreeRingCircus · 19/02/2023 07:49

It's extremely bad manners and I can't believe people on here saying leaving them out is an invitation for other people to read them. They're probably the sort of people who probably look to see what appointments are written on your wall calender or read your post if it's left out.

I look at birthday cards but wouldn't dream of looking at calendars or post. I wouldn't even read my DH's post. I'm not going to be looking at birthday cards in future though!

Sparklingbrook · 19/02/2023 08:09

The people that do this-why? What are you needing or wanting to see?

ComfortablyDazed · 19/02/2023 08:10

AuntieStella · 19/02/2023 06:34

I'd read them, if on display and can be read without touching.

I wouldn't pick them up to check the inside wording (so whether you can see it depends on where they're displayed) or go rootling.

I think it's entirely unrealistic to expect visitors not to notice things you have chosen to put on display.

Of course people will notice things. That’s fine.

Being nosey and reading other people’s cards/letters/mail? No-one with a clue does this.

ComfortablyDazed · 19/02/2023 08:11

Sparklingbrook · 19/02/2023 08:09

The people that do this-why? What are you needing or wanting to see?

I asked this upthread.

Nobody answered. Presumably because the answer is ‘I’m a nosy fucker’.

Sparklingbrook · 19/02/2023 08:12

I might look from a distance at the cards on my parents’ mantelpiece and ask them who one was from if it had a nice picture or a funny one. No interest in reading them though.

Sparklingbrook · 19/02/2023 08:13

ComfortablyDazed · 19/02/2023 08:11

I asked this upthread.

Nobody answered. Presumably because the answer is ‘I’m a nosy fucker’.

Show quote history

I think that’s the only answer. 🤷‍♀️

Iateallthewotsits · 19/02/2023 08:14

Of course not, how rude.

Renoir56 · 19/02/2023 08:15

Sparklingbrook · 19/02/2023 08:09

The people that do this-why? What are you needing or wanting to see?

Honestly I don't know. It's almost like a reflex reaction. I'm not actually that interested and I'm not a nosey person. I've never thought about it before, it's just something I might do.

And now I find the thought of it completely bizarre. Although I wouldn't care if someone did it in my house.

Iateallthewotsits · 19/02/2023 08:17

sammylady37 · 19/02/2023 08:04

I really despise nosy people. Reading someone’s cards is intrusive and rude. And no, them being on display is not an invitation for others to read them. Someone doing this in my home would be asked to stop pretty sharply and if invited back would be watched quite closely for other invasions of privacy.

A guest once went to the bathroom in my house, walking past the main bathroom to go into the en-suite and then looked in the cupboard there and had the nerve to come back to the kitchen and question me on something she’d seen there. She has not been in my home since.

I can never get over just how fucking strange people can be.

HelloBunny · 19/02/2023 08:20

Of course I’d read them.
And wouldn’t mind anyone reading mine. Not like they’re watching my sex video! (I don’t have one, obvs).

EnglishRain · 19/02/2023 08:20

I think it's very rude. Fine to look at the card eg. What a lovely card who made it? Different to open and read it.

WouldJudasLeaveIt · 19/02/2023 08:21

I'm so shocked so many are admitting to strolling over to the mantelpiece to read cards sent to somebody else, the thought of doing it is making me go red 🥴
Nosy bleeders 😑

ComfortablyDazed · 19/02/2023 08:23

HelloBunny · 19/02/2023 08:20

Of course I’d read them.
And wouldn’t mind anyone reading mine. Not like they’re watching my sex video! (I don’t have one, obvs).

Why ‘of course’?

What do you need to know from other people’s cards that are none of your business?

rexythedinosaur · 19/02/2023 08:23

I think it's quite intimate and overstepping.

I wouldn't expect visitors to read mine if I go to the bathroom or something, same as I wouldn't expect them to be opening drawers and rummaging around.

It's just a bit weird and nosey. I wouldn't mind at all if they asked, though.

Sparklingbrook · 19/02/2023 08:23

HelloBunny · 19/02/2023 08:20

Of course I’d read them.
And wouldn’t mind anyone reading mine. Not like they’re watching my sex video! (I don’t have one, obvs).

Why ‘of course’? What do you gain from it?

ZenNudist · 19/02/2023 08:25

Yes if on display.

WouldJudasLeaveIt · 19/02/2023 08:26

ZenNudist · 19/02/2023 08:25

Yes if on display.

Would you physically pick them up and read them? 😶

Renoir56 · 19/02/2023 08:27

Now that I think about i can't really see why it's such a big deal. I wouldn't care if someone read cards I'd put on display. It's not remotely like reading someone's post or looking in a bathroom cabinet.

ComfortablyDazed · 19/02/2023 08:30

Renoir56 · 19/02/2023 08:27

Now that I think about i can't really see why it's such a big deal. I wouldn't care if someone read cards I'd put on display. It's not remotely like reading someone's post or looking in a bathroom cabinet.

It’s exactly like it.

Sparklingbrook · 19/02/2023 08:30

Renoir56 · 19/02/2023 08:27

Now that I think about i can't really see why it's such a big deal. I wouldn't care if someone read cards I'd put on display. It's not remotely like reading someone's post or looking in a bathroom cabinet.

It doesn’t matter if you wouldn’t care. Maybe they don’t want you nosing at their cards.
The front is displayed but not the writing inside.

Tiredmum100 · 19/02/2023 08:31

I don't, but much my mum does..it really annoys me but I don't say anything. She'll read dh birthdays cards too. I really don't know why.

Penguinsaregreat · 19/02/2023 08:35

My mother always did this. I’ve got her reading my mail too. Yes it was ‘out’ on the kitchen table for example and not filed away, but she would need to open out the letter and read it. She always used to do it until I physically removed all my post. She would also comment about who had sent a card.

Penguinsaregreat · 19/02/2023 08:35

Got=caught

Thighlengthboots · 19/02/2023 08:41

Now that I think about i can't really see why it's such a big deal. I wouldn't care if someone read cards I'd put on display. It's not remotely like reading someone's post or looking in a bathroom cabinet

Its exactly the same. Its thinking you have a right or are entitled to be privy to personal information/communication about or with that person. I just presume that people who do this have very sad lives themselves if they have to do this to get some kind of entertainment for themselves.

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