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Original poster

When visiting someone’s house - do you read greetings cards?

151 replies

Username24680 · 18/02/2023 21:31

You pop in to visit someone - there are cards sitting on display (Valentines on this occasion). Would it enter your mind to go and read the cards?

OP posts:
Selttan · 18/02/2023 22:34

At my parents yes (and they do the same to me) but at anyone else's house no.

AnnaTortoiseshell · 18/02/2023 22:37

If I wanted to I would ask, but only ever my parents or sister. I would never think to do this with anyone else. Displaying cards is absolutely not an invitation to read them!

didloswaggings · 18/02/2023 22:38

plumduck · 18/02/2023 21:35

I tend to just go oooh that's a nice one who is that from.

I do this to my 'bestie' & cheeky say who's this from?! She says we'll just bloody read it Grin(we've been very close friends since childhood)

Sunshineparasol · 18/02/2023 22:39

My friends' MIL does, she says if it's on display then it's fair game for reading by anyone, if it's that private it should be out of sight.

Personally I wouldn't, I think it's bad manners. Same as if people have left post out. It's not an actual invitation for anyone to read it. Yes it could have been put away if very private but IMO it's just nosey to see what's been written inside.

My mum likes to read cards too and what's worse is that she is particularly interested in husband/wife cards and what's been written, then she gossips about it to others. I know for example that one of her friends who had experienced marital problems during the year, that friend's husband had written some heartfelt words in his Christmas card to his DW (mum's friend) which my mum seemed to memorise just so she could gossip to everyone about. It made me twitchy.

Wudgy · 18/02/2023 22:41

My parents in law do this, absolutely hate this so much. Last week FIL called in with his key before I got home , when I walked in he was reading our valentines cards to each other… embarrassing silent spread around the room as I knew my husbands card referenced the gift he got me and was looking forward to trying out later once kids were in bed with winky face drawn ….Doubt that will stop them reading in the future though. I would never read anyone’s cards regardless of the occasion, find it so bizarre that people would!

notangelinajolie · 18/02/2023 22:42

No never but my mum used to. I used to put all cards in a drawer whenever she knocked on the door. I think it’s really rude to read someone else’s cards.

SaulHudsonDavidJones · 18/02/2023 22:44

My mother in law always does this and I find it really rude. The message is for the recipient, not anyone else.

maddiemookins16mum · 18/02/2023 22:45

Depends. Close family? maybe although I’d probably say ‘ooh can I look at your cards, oh this one from your mate Deb is lovely etc’ - non family, nope.

evemillbank · 18/02/2023 22:47

No but my mum and my aunties and my nans would.

SunsetStrip · 18/02/2023 22:58

My mum reads ours, I thought we were supposed to. MIL shouted at me for reading hers, I genuinely didn't want to but thought I was being rude not to, lol

I've never done it since and that makes me happy, I'm not bloody interested, lol

I've since asked my mum and she has said she only reads mine but she has no idea why she does it, lol

Cheeriochoc · 18/02/2023 23:00

No I find it very rude especially with valentines where you’re writing a special / private message to your partner. Unfortunately I do have people in the family who do this. It’s just such bad form but I guess nobody has ever pointed that out to them!

newnamethanks · 18/02/2023 23:02

No. Nor would I poke around in closed drawers, inspect the bedrooms uninvited or otherwise intrude in things that don't concern me. Rude. Extremely rude.

NoDairyNoProblem · 18/02/2023 23:06

Sunshineparasol · 18/02/2023 22:39

My friends' MIL does, she says if it's on display then it's fair game for reading by anyone, if it's that private it should be out of sight.

Personally I wouldn't, I think it's bad manners. Same as if people have left post out. It's not an actual invitation for anyone to read it. Yes it could have been put away if very private but IMO it's just nosey to see what's been written inside.

My mum likes to read cards too and what's worse is that she is particularly interested in husband/wife cards and what's been written, then she gossips about it to others. I know for example that one of her friends who had experienced marital problems during the year, that friend's husband had written some heartfelt words in his Christmas card to his DW (mum's friend) which my mum seemed to memorise just so she could gossip to everyone about. It made me twitchy.

If a friend gossiped like this to me they wouldn’t be a friend for much longer as I would assume she would bitch about me just as quickly.

I would never read someone else’s cards, it’s downright rude.

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 18/02/2023 23:07

You mean, inside the card? No, that would be really rude.

Gagaandgag · 18/02/2023 23:14

I do 🤣 just assume if they are out on show they are Fair game. Friends and family read ours and I like it when they do - shows they care I think

VintageThoughts · 18/02/2023 23:26

No way! It's essentially post that's addressed to someone else.

All the people saying yes, would you read a letter that had been left out? Or a postcard?

It's just really really rude!

Whydoitry · 18/02/2023 23:29

I might if it had half a joke on the front and I wanted to read the punchline.

Otherwise no. Especially not Valentine's cards, I don't want to risk reading risqué or mushy stuff!

whatthehelldowecare · 18/02/2023 23:37

Another one who knows I shouldn't but I probably would on the sly.

I left the valentines cards on display forgetting my MIL would be coming home ver to get the dogs when we were both at work.. let's hope she's a better person than me or she'll have seen the inappropriate poem I wrote inside DH's card Blush

DietrichandDiMaggio · 18/02/2023 23:45

VintageThoughts · 18/02/2023 23:26

No way! It's essentially post that's addressed to someone else.

All the people saying yes, would you read a letter that had been left out? Or a postcard?

It's just really really rude!

To be fair, most people don't put all of their letters on display on the mantlepiece.

Easternext · 18/02/2023 23:48

Nope, I dont even read my own cards properly just skim over it so no chance am reading others.

AdamantEve · 18/02/2023 23:58

I wouldn’t, but my MIL does!

Killeditwithkisses · 19/02/2023 00:06

No it’s rude.

My in-laws let a relative in to my house once “to wait for us” while myself and my partner were out at work. I know our soppy anniversary cards were read, because the relative later commented.
I felt violated to be honest- it was a card for my partner, nobody else. In-laws no longer have a key

keeprunning55 · 19/02/2023 00:10

Yes-when no one’s looking!

xprincessxjanetx · 19/02/2023 00:26

No, I wouldn't.

ComfortablyDazed · 19/02/2023 00:31

No, it’s rude.

Can the people who do it explain why they think it’s OK to read mail/letters/cards to someone else? Why is it any of your business?

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