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Original poster

Am I a snob?

59 replies

minitegg · 18/02/2023 16:43

My friend lives around a hour away and invited me over hers to go to a pub.
She said it's a nice family pub
So over I go.
In my head I'm expecting a nice pub with a fire,nice food etc
Oh no she took me to the local working men's club.
Which didn't even look like a pub,more like a big shed.
Anyway we walk in and there's about 8 people in-all old men,football on the tv and inside it resembled a school disco hall.
Random tables with 80s seats
Then my friend says it gets busier lately.
So off we go sitting on a table whilst the football match is on-every 15 mins she goes out for a vape..and I'm just sat there watching my clock.
She gets really drunk and says "shall we go sit with them" (and points to some men about 80)
I ask why ?
And she says it might be fun
So off she goes screeching "hiyaaaaaaa yous alright -had a good night -brilliant in here isn't it"

At this point all I can think of is a takeaway and home
Worst night of my life -am I snob ?

OP posts:
Ireallydohope · 18/02/2023 16:44

No it was shit night out

Ireallydohope · 18/02/2023 16:45

I would have enticed her to go elsewhere otherwise made my excuses and left

Yesthatismychildsigh · 18/02/2023 16:45

No. That sounds hideous. I’d never encountered a working men’s club until my 30’s, not a thing where I come from. I’ve had some of the best times in ‘rough’ pubs but working men’s clubs can be grim. Sounds like a joyless place.

ShowOfHands · 18/02/2023 16:46

Well if it was the worst night of your life, you're probably quite lucky in general.

Had you never met this person before? You sound remarkably surprised by her diction and vernacular.

TheSnowyOwl · 18/02/2023 16:47

I think it sounds like you have different expectations and ways of enjoying yourself but I’m surprised that you have a friend, who is worth making the effort of a two hour round trip to see, and you don’t already know this about them.

So1invictus · 18/02/2023 16:51

That's what a working men's club was like about 45 years ago when I was a child.
Did you go through a rift in the time and space vortex to get to it?

Original poster
minitegg · 18/02/2023 16:53

This was in a small village
I meant worst night out of my life
If I had known that's where we were going I would of said no

OP posts:
Companyofwolves · 18/02/2023 16:55

Do you not know her very well? Surely you’d know what she likes, her tastes etc or are you getting to know her better?
Maybe you aren’t as compatible as you thought?

StrychnineInTheSandwiches · 18/02/2023 16:56
Grin when your friend says 'do you want to go an sit with them?' you at least hope they're going to be decent looking and below retirement age!

You're not a snob, you just have different ideas of what constitutes a good night out. A shed like pub with just a few patrons watching football doesn't sound fantastic tbh.

Nimbostratus100 · 18/02/2023 16:58

working mens clubs can be great, but not for a one off visit, if you are part of the regulars, and involved in the quizes, darts, football, etc

ItchyBillco · 18/02/2023 16:59

minitegg · 18/02/2023 16:53

This was in a small village
I meant worst night out of my life
If I had known that's where we were going I would of said no

It sounds like something she does often, getting wasted and then using the attention of old(er) men to make her feel better. I mean, that’s total speculation based on someone I know who does that same thing and it’s utterly, utterly tragic.

AnotherCountryMummy · 18/02/2023 17:02

It sounds horrific. I would have left.

TheGold · 18/02/2023 17:04

It’s quite funny, really Grin. Why your friend thought getting pissed and hitting on geriatric men in a village working mens club was a good night out is anyone’s guess.

You’re not a snob. But I would’ve been tempted to get the drinks in and make the best of it, just for the craic.

StrychnineInTheSandwiches · 18/02/2023 17:06

Is your friend Kerry Mucklowe?

LakeTiticaca · 18/02/2023 17:30

No your not being a snob. I frequented a few of the old fashioned working mens clubs back in the 80s and apart from cheap beer and the occasional decent comedian, it was mostly formica tables and angry stares, particularly if you found yourself sitting at "someone's table"
Usually some old bloke of about 80 called Jim 😉😉

ALongHardWinter · 18/02/2023 17:40

Sounds ghastly!

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 18/02/2023 17:41

I think you have different definitions of 'nice pub'. Your friend presumably rates it because it's friendly and welcoming, not trendy and uncomfortable. I'd prefer that set up to one of those places where loud music blares out and you can't hear yourself think, let alone have a conversation.

I understand your hankering for the roaring log fire and hearty food - that's my ideal sort of pub, too. But I don't think the working men's club type place is the worst - far from it.

It's not snobbish. A snob would have gone in there, ordered a pie and a pint and talked loudly in a posh voice about how 'stunningly authentic' it all was Grin

AltheaVestr1t · 18/02/2023 17:44

When out at a Christmas market, DP took me to a old working men's club replete with 80s seats, brown walls and an old cigarette machine. I was very confused as to why he chose it until we ordered food - the menu was full of interesting choices and the food was delicious. I expressed my surprise at getting such a high quality, up to date meal at such an old fashioned club. My DH pissed himself. The venue was new, the decor was themed, and the club was a new city hot spot. 🙄

MrBallensWife · 18/02/2023 17:54

No,you're not being a snob.

Sounds hideous for you but hilarious for the reader 🤣

FredPolice · 18/02/2023 17:54

If you're friends with this woman, how can you not know what she's like?

redundantsoon · 18/02/2023 17:56

Fuck no, sounds hideous.

grayhairdontcare · 18/02/2023 18:04

It sounds like you don't know your friend very well

2013isback · 18/02/2023 18:05

Doesn't sound like snobbery, just different tastes and preferences and expectations. If she lives in a small village, perhaps that pub seems nice to her because it's the only place to go, or the most appealing of limited bad options?

If you take turns choosing a place to meet, I can understand why you stayed (because it was her choice and she seemed to like it). Otherwise, I'd have pushed for going somewhere else after a bit, or going back to her place, or just packing it in for the evening.

Also, though: if she was very drunk and you were sober, that might be a big part of why she seemed to be having such fun over things that bored or replused you.

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 18/02/2023 18:27

AltheaVestr1t · 18/02/2023 17:44

When out at a Christmas market, DP took me to a old working men's club replete with 80s seats, brown walls and an old cigarette machine. I was very confused as to why he chose it until we ordered food - the menu was full of interesting choices and the food was delicious. I expressed my surprise at getting such a high quality, up to date meal at such an old fashioned club. My DH pissed himself. The venue was new, the decor was themed, and the club was a new city hot spot. 🙄

OP, are you sure it wasn't an 'ironic' venue like this one Grin ?

pilates · 18/02/2023 18:29

No sounds hideous.