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Hes coming out of prison

57 replies

Notsogreat23 · 16/02/2023 19:50

Dds ex is coming out of prison in a few days. He went in for domestic violence. He originally got 9 months. That's automatically halfed. But then he broke restraining order whilst in prison. He got gate arrested and went back to prison. He was then let out briefly on licence but broke the conditions so back to prison. Basically he ended up doing 2 years.

Both me and Dd had to be housed under life in danger. There was a silver lining with that one as there were housing issues anyway.

My kids schools have all been made aware of her ex coming out of prison. And sent a photo of him. My 12 year old has been given a paper with a picture of him . That if he tries to approach her, she has to show it to a shop keeper or simlar it says that that the male pictured is a danger. Please can she wait in the shop until its safe.

Hes also told his probation officer that he actually knows where DD lives. When he was questioned further he did not give anymore information. He does play alot of mind games so hoping it's that . As a safety measure DD place is going to have an extra strong door. And locks . Also a button thing that directs to the police . Her address will also have a marker which means police will be fast to get to her.

It feels kind of scary now I wrote it down.
I know when he gets out he has to go to the housing department. From meetings its been said he won't be put close to the borough. I pray they put him very very far . I also pray he vanishes from the face if the earth 😭

OP posts:
ourflagmeansdeath · 16/02/2023 19:56

I'm really sorry for your situation. I'm not much help, but I hope everything turns out for the better. Stay safe with your DC, and I hope for the best for you and your family in this scary time. X

Notsogreat23 · 16/02/2023 20:36

ourflagmeansdeath · 16/02/2023 19:56

I'm really sorry for your situation. I'm not much help, but I hope everything turns out for the better. Stay safe with your DC, and I hope for the best for you and your family in this scary time. X

Hopefully he will just leave dd alone and everyone can get on with their life. Thank you for replying

OP posts:
FuelledbyCaffeine12 · 16/02/2023 20:42

Oh my goodness I’m so sorry that you are all having to deal with this. He shouldn’t be allowed out if he’s a risk. I cannot imagine the level of stress you are living under. I hope you remain safe

Greenshake · 16/02/2023 20:44

Have you posted before? I am sure I remember you.

wizzywig · 16/02/2023 20:48

Is there a sig marker on your address op?

Justmeandthedog1 · 16/02/2023 20:53

He can’t trace or track your DDs phone can he?
You and she have got a lot of measures in place. I’d add in rape alarms, the louder the better, to carry when out and always lock car doors when driving or parked up. I know some people say don’t lock doors in case of an RTA but I still drive with them locked.

LaLaLouella · 16/02/2023 20:54

Oh OP, that must be so worrying for you. I can offer nothing but sympathy I'm afraid, I hope prison has made him see the error of his ways and he leaves you all alone.

Notsogreat23 · 16/02/2023 21:23

wizzywig · 16/02/2023 20:48

Is there a sig marker on your address op?

Not on mine. As far as I know. There was at my old address whilst he was on the run. But im quite sure there's not one now.

OP posts:
Notsogreat23 · 16/02/2023 21:33

Justmeandthedog1 · 16/02/2023 20:53

He can’t trace or track your DDs phone can he?
You and she have got a lot of measures in place. I’d add in rape alarms, the louder the better, to carry when out and always lock car doors when driving or parked up. I know some people say don’t lock doors in case of an RTA but I still drive with them locked.

Dd has a new phone and new number.

None of us drive. Wish dd did though. Oh yes they are doing something about her mobile as well so police can trace where she is without her having to talk . No idea how that works. Rape alarm could be an idea.

OP posts:
GoodVibesHere · 16/02/2023 21:41

All I can think of is maybe cctv cameras for your DDs home. Maybe a guard dog for protection but obviously that's a big undertaking.

Notsogreat23 · 16/02/2023 21:46

GoodVibesHere · 16/02/2023 21:41

All I can think of is maybe cctv cameras for your DDs home. Maybe a guard dog for protection but obviously that's a big undertaking.

She can do ring door bell. /cctv Definitely not a dog

OP posts:
Notsogreat23 · 16/02/2023 22:21

Greenshake · 16/02/2023 20:44

Have you posted before? I am sure I remember you.

@Greenshake I name change alot so much that I have lost track of my usernames. Although I know my situation will be recognised here and there . But I try to stay at least semi anonymous.

sorry this has come out in bold I have no idea why

OP posts:
Backstreets · 16/02/2023 22:23

How scary OP. Hope he leaves you and DD well alone.

Notsogreat23 · 17/02/2023 00:08

Backstreets · 16/02/2023 22:23

How scary OP. Hope he leaves you and DD well alone.

Hopefully we ate all over thinking and we will never hear from him again.

OP posts:
Lavender14 · 17/02/2023 00:14

Has your dd been through MARAC? If so the lha should be attending those meetings and be fully aware that he cannot be housed anywhere near her. He should also be linked in with an offenders programme and she should be receiving contact from his probation officer to ensure he hasn't been harassing or intimidating her. It's awful that you need to live under the weight of his behaviour. I definitely would get cctv etc and make sure it covers any cars parked by the house as well and all entrances and windows. It sounds like everyone has a good safety plan in place for if he does turn up and please god he won't.

Notsogreat23 · 17/02/2023 00:24

Lavender14 · 17/02/2023 00:14

Has your dd been through MARAC? If so the lha should be attending those meetings and be fully aware that he cannot be housed anywhere near her. He should also be linked in with an offenders programme and she should be receiving contact from his probation officer to ensure he hasn't been harassing or intimidating her. It's awful that you need to live under the weight of his behaviour. I definitely would get cctv etc and make sure it covers any cars parked by the house as well and all entrances and windows. It sounds like everyone has a good safety plan in place for if he does turn up and please god he won't.

Yes MARAC are involved. He does not engage in anything that he should. And yes his probation officer always comes to meetings.

OP posts:
Utilitaparking · 17/02/2023 06:43

I'm glad that (for once!) the appropriate authorities are supporting you how they should be doing. You also seem to have everything else I can think of covered yourselves.

That won't make you feel any less scared and I can't imagine how you all feel but you have my sympathies, I really hope he stays away

Notsogreat23 · 17/02/2023 09:26

Utilitaparking · 17/02/2023 06:43

I'm glad that (for once!) the appropriate authorities are supporting you how they should be doing. You also seem to have everything else I can think of covered yourselves.

That won't make you feel any less scared and I can't imagine how you all feel but you have my sympathies, I really hope he stays away

Yes everything is in place. Just got to hope they house him in middle of no where, England does not feel very big at all right now.

OP posts:
Notsogreat23 · 18/02/2023 22:01

Hes coming out Monday. Now its Saturday feels so close. Dd got some paper work. He's on supervision order for 8 weeks. Even if he breaks the most he would get is 14 days in prison or a fine.

I want him to do something stupid that lands him in prison for a long time. But nothing related to Dd.

OP posts:
Greenshake · 18/02/2023 22:21

That sounds like Post Sentence Supervision rather than a licence. Bear in mind though that if he breaches this by breaking the law/committing a new offence that will be dealt with as a new and separate matter.

Notsogreat23 · 18/02/2023 22:31

Greenshake · 18/02/2023 22:21

That sounds like Post Sentence Supervision rather than a licence. Bear in mind though that if he breaches this by breaking the law/committing a new offence that will be dealt with as a new and separate matter.

Yeah I know. Dd has a 15 year restraining order on him. Just hope he keeps away . I still wish him a long prison sentence though for something not linked with dd

OP posts:
Greenshake · 04/03/2023 22:04

All ok?

Notsogreat23 · 05/03/2023 13:22

@Greenshake

I have been posting but i keep changing names. In a nut shell he's broken restraining order almost 200 times. Dd and grandson have to stay with me. Not allowed out alone . Have to get cabs everywhere until he is arrested. Police were meant to arrest when he went probation but they messed up. They tried to arrest at the place he's staying he was not there. His neighbours told him police were there so now he's hiding.

OP posts:
MrsOvertonsWindow · 05/03/2023 13:30

That's dreadful Notsogreat23. Hope that the police pick him up asap.

LiesDoNotBecomeUs · 05/03/2023 13:37

It is terrible that someone who is so focused on re-offending still gets out!
I hope he is picked up soon and that he has not found you all.

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