My 21 yo son and 19yo GF plan to rent a house together

[Menomaddness]

This is a good thing generally, they've been together 2 years, spend a lot of time sleeping here and it's time. They both work but not in especially well paid jobs. About £45k income between them, but DS is on a decent career path. GF less so but she's very young.

Rent will be £1200 pm plus bills.

They do not have £1200 left at the end of the month currently, both spend money like water, but I guess when they have to they'll sort that out. DS pays keep of £200pm currently.

What worries me is the future. If they spend all this on rent, they'll never buy anything, but I also recognise that feels like an impossible dream anyway. An ex council flat is about £250k to buy here, so even if they saved 10 or 20% deposit, they wouldn't get the mortgage on their income.

However, I also know that as someone close to retirement with the mortgage paid off, buying young has made my current situation much better than it would otherwise be. I really can't imaging paying £1200 pm rent throughout retirement (more if they don't stay in a starter home forever).

Where will generation rent live as retirees?

Obviously it's a really long way off, but is there something of a time bomb for this gernation of young people?

Rents are getting ridiculous everywhere though.

The house we left in London as we were priced out of the market there (or anywhere close) went on the market again last week for £800 a month more than we were paying three years ago. £800 increase in three years! And after we left, it was rented to people who trashed it. The new photos are horrendous. It’s now almost 3k a month and it’s a hole.

We were just lucky that dh job in London went fully remote so we could get out or god knows what we would be doing now. We were already getting a small top up from housing benefit despite both working full time. Dh has a “good” job but it’s for a London local authority so the pay is crap.

But, we moved to an absolute shit hole of a place in the West Midlands as it what what we could afford. The same has happened here. Before we bought a place here last year, we rented a 3 bed house for 750 a month. Now, 3 beds are going for 1,000 a month.

This is a horrendously deprived area. Huge unemployment. Crime, schools are all shit. I can’t get over the increase in rents here. It’s the sort of place you lock your car doors when you drive though it and the rents are becoming horrendous. If we hadn’t managed to buy a place, we would have been priced out of the rental market here too soon.

It seems to me that 21 and 19 is rather young to be settling down together by modern standards, but if they are sure that’s what they want then it might be best. They do have the earnings to be independent ( which some that age wouldn’t) and tbh much as we love our adult children I don’t think it’s that reasonable to always expect that they can live as a couple in the parents home for a lengthy period of time.

Well, they just need to rent a room in a house share, just like everyone else does when they are young. Expectations that they should be able to afford to buy something soon is ridiculous. They both need to work, progress in their career, earn more money and save for deposit. In 10 years or so it should be achievable with the sensible budget.

Yep. Same in my (non posh) bit of SW London

This. They need to be independent adults, and if it works out too expensive they will have to do as PP says and get a room in a flat share. Buying is a huge financial commitment that isn’t necessarily advantageous for a very young couple at the start of their careers anyway.

Could you help them draw up a budget/ expense tracker with the various costs eg bills, internet, rent, food etc

And at the start of their relationship! I bought young, yes it had its advantages but it did keep me in a relationship I really should have left much much sooner as we were tied together with a mortgage, house to sell etc.

I understand what you mean, OP.

In the early 2000s, I started renting a very small starter flat for £900 in what was always a ridiculously expensive property market. That same flat was recently advertised to rent again and the current rental price is £2,850. An eye watering increase, and wages haven’t tripled in that time.

I’m at the upper age of “generation rent” but was lucky in the sense that I met my now-husband quite young and we were able to get on the property market when I was relatively young (was 23 buying our first). He’s a little bit older than me and had savings which formed the majority of our deposit.

With your son, the first thing that stands out is their ages. 21 and 19 is so young. Hopefully they’ll stay happy and stay together but there’s a good chance they might not and a lease is so much better wiser to untangle that a mortgage/purchased property.

Would they consider a houseshare? Much cheaper and doing it when you’re young is easier than when you’re that bit older, especially if they can share with friends.

I definitely wouldn’t be housing them both if I were you. If they feel they’re old enough to be independent, they should go and do that.

Of course it is! It may have been more usual years ago, but 19 and 21yo's don't tend to get married or be able to afford to buy houses these days. Times have changed as you well know.

that’s life I’m afraid. To be honest it’s a little bit tight that you’re charging him £200 a month when your generation were able to buy a house for £10,000 on a tiny salary. You say they spend money like water but that’s because wages haven’t risen but everything else has. Why don’t you save the £200 he’s giving you and give him it back as a deposit?

Rent is very high at the moment but they are both very young so their incomes should rise. They have time on their side, and in a few years hopefully they will earn more and very able to start saving. Is there anyway you'd be able to help in a few years time with a deposit? I plan to help my dc when they get to that point.

Gosh they're both so very very young.

I would encourage them to become more established in their careers. Has the gf been to uni and have a career?

It would be tragic if she ended up with a tiny baby and no job skills. So many young women entire up in poverty.

Relationships tend to go a lot more smoothly without money troubles. They've got plenty of time for moving in and starting a family.

Surely you’ve saved the £200 per month that he has given you, so that you can give it back to him?!?

You say they both spend money like water' so they haven't taken advantage of living at home to try and save some money? How about they both live in their respective homes for six months (if it's ok with you ) and just see what they can save.

Their take home should be just over £1600 per month each on £23k so if your DS is paying you £200 he should be able to save a big chunk of cash.

If they moved out, rented and still spent money like water' they could be in trouble in a very short space of time.

That would be considered v reasonable rent for a 1 bed here (SE but not London) and I think it’s sensible they do it for 12 months. They need to understand the true cost of living; whether they want to be with each other 24/7; be motivated to earn more if possible etc. After then, and if there’s the opportunity to move back with parents to save for a deposit, they’ll know what is required and really want it together.

Rents are very expensive compared to wages now. My mortgage is £650 and when I started paying it you could of rented a nice 2 bed flat close to the city centre in Edinburgh (where I’m from) now rent on those flats is double that. Wages haven’t I earned about £19k, lots of people still earning around the 19k- 22k.

I wouldn’t be keen on having partner live with me either surely they can live with respective parents and stay over 1-2 a week and save if they want. If they want to live together they can pay rent. I would suggest they do a budget together though. Young people are often surprised at how much council tax and bills add up to. Old people too my bills are more than my mortgage.

Surely? Why does she have to?

I think you can only do that if you are relatively well off. And it depends on what they expect for it. Are they buying their own food or eating with the family.

My son pays £250 a month rent. We couldn’t afford another adult in the house without that. There’s no way I can save that for him. That goes towards bills and food.

I’ve had people shocked that I am not saving it to give back to him. But I can’t. I’d love to be in the position to, but few people are.

Iateallthewotsits and illtakeit I agree. It's £50 a week - nothing in the scheme of things, probably wouldn't even cover the increased power bills and if he's wasting money, even saving it up to give back won't cover more than a couple of months rent.

I'll likely never be able to afford to buy a house. I have a HA property. I'll have to use my private pension to pay the rent when I retire, and housing benefit when that runs out. It's just the way it is.

Most people can't save the money that the DC give to them for keep as it is for going towards living expenses not for a savings account. It's only on here that people have large enough houses to house adult DC and their partners and put the keep money into accounts to give to them at a later date. Meanwhile in the real world...

Not everyone can afford to do that! When my son is working full time he will need to contribute to bills as I'm single and will lose my UC.

In my opinion OP, these kids are still very young. I do understand your concern though but they will figure it out. As you said your son is on a good career path so he'll start earning a bit more as the years go by, so is his GF.

You've said they spend money like water. Well when I was that age I use to do the same because I had no real responsibilities but once push came to shove I knew what I had to do. Again, they'll figure it out.

can they not do a house share/rent a studio first??? i didn't rent a 1 bed til later earning more..... can they move to a cheaper area with their jobs??

most youngsters not at home that i know are doing that in SE to try and save..... maybe they should be focusing on saving ....

£45k between them is £3.75k per month - take off £500 for tax and that’s still well over £3k per month left.

After rent that’s £2k left for bills and living - a lot of people do it on a lot less.
They’ll have to cut back on the fancy cars and other luxuries if they want to save, but on their wage and that rent they’ll be absolutely fine as long as they stop pissing money away.