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Original poster

Antibreastfeeding?

585 replies

Redebs · 03/02/2023 08:33

Having just browsed some of the 'Help articles' on here, I'm shocked at how Mumsnet is discouraging breastfeeding.

There's one on how normal it is to wean off the breast at two months because of all the 'problems you will have'.

There's one on 'combi feeding', which is about giving formula feeds to breastfed babies - the surest way to reduce your milk supply in reality.

There's another one about packing dummies and bottles in your hospital labour bag. This is definitely going to interfere with newborns getting colostrum and learning to latch. If a baby needs anything, the hospital will provide it in reality.

I know some women choose to formula feed, but these are insidious, supposedly helpful, undermining tactics aimed at new mothers trying to breastfeed. Most of these are sponsored by the baby bottle manufacturer MAM.

If formula companies were promoting this, they would be, rightly, in contravention of advertising rules.

All medical and scientific advice is to give exclusively breastmilk for the first six months and to continue to at least twelve months or longer.

OP posts:
Twizbe · 03/02/2023 08:38

Sadly the formula companies are very good and finding loopholes everywhere.

I saw an advert on Facebook the other day for a free new baby pack. Front and centre was a bottle. The message clearly being that bottles are essential kit for a newborn.

Now there is NOTHING wrong with choosing to formula feed.

There is lots wrong with underhand, unethical marketing practices which undermine women's confidence around breastfeeding.

NorthernExpat · 03/02/2023 08:39

Do you think women can’t be trusted to make their own decisions and so info about alternatives to ebf should be restricted?

Trust me the message that exclusive breastfeeding is the only virtuous choice is heard loud and clear by new mums. Providing information to the large proportion of them who can’t or don’t want to ebf forever is perfectly reasonable in a world where women are adults who can make choices based on a range of information sources.

BridieConvert · 03/02/2023 08:40

NorthernExpat · 03/02/2023 08:39

Do you think women can’t be trusted to make their own decisions and so info about alternatives to ebf should be restricted?

Trust me the message that exclusive breastfeeding is the only virtuous choice is heard loud and clear by new mums. Providing information to the large proportion of them who can’t or don’t want to ebf forever is perfectly reasonable in a world where women are adults who can make choices based on a range of information sources.

This x10000

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Babies & sleep Breast & bottle feeding Families
BridieConvert · 03/02/2023 08:41

I didn't choose to combi feed because of an article/advert I saw.
I chose to combi feed for the sake of my mental health and therefore the sake of my baby.

ChickenRat · 03/02/2023 08:43

Likewise @BridieConvert

And I made the decision myself, not based on what strangers on the internet told me to do.

Twizbe · 03/02/2023 08:43

Here's the thing though. The formula companies have a long history of giving misleading and factually incorrect information to new mothers.

In this country where we have clean water, relative wealth and high literacy rates that isn't the end of the world.

In some countries this leads to women starting formula feeding where they have neither the means or ability to continue to do it safely and babies have and do die.

That is why the formula companies are limited in what they can advertise. The WHO code is very strict and the UK hasn't adopted all of it by any means.

Women can make a choice for themselves and there is NOTHING wrong with choosing to formula feed.

However, nothing can change the fact that breastfeeding is how our species is meant to feed their young. On a population level higher rates of breastfeeding is preferable. On an individual level it's a choice.

getmeacupoftea · 03/02/2023 08:44

I cried and cried and cried and felt like the worst mother in the world and that I didn't deserve my son after I struggled to breastfeed through the awful pain of an excruciating emergency c section, not to mention it felt like cheese graters on my nipples every time he latched.
The message got through that breast is best. Don't worry.

skywalkersweetie · 03/02/2023 08:45

Also bottles can be used to give expressed breast milk? A bottle in itself isn't anti breastfeeding but allows a bf mum to not have responsibility for every single feed

Sistanotcista · 03/02/2023 08:45

NorthernExpat · 03/02/2023 08:39

Do you think women can’t be trusted to make their own decisions and so info about alternatives to ebf should be restricted?

Trust me the message that exclusive breastfeeding is the only virtuous choice is heard loud and clear by new mums. Providing information to the large proportion of them who can’t or don’t want to ebf forever is perfectly reasonable in a world where women are adults who can make choices based on a range of information sources.

Hear hear!!

SalviaOfficinalis · 03/02/2023 08:46

Start a thread in site stuff and tag MNHQ if you want to complain to MN about the articles.

You can put breast milk in bottles too you know…

Personally I felt the biggest wave of relief I’ve ever experienced when I stopped BFing at 3 months.

MajorCarolDanvers · 03/02/2023 08:47

It's not surprising that the UK has the worst breastfeeding statistics in the entire world

Not enough support and mixed messages everywhere.

Bingobangodrinkacanoftango · 03/02/2023 08:47

As someone who did natural term weaning and donated heavily to the breast milk bank, I don’t think there is any harm in being informed. It CAN be incredibly difficult and it’s not always possible to take to it - I know some women who have felt incredibly pressured into breastfeeding and alternatively those desperate to continue and unable to for various reasons. Nothing wrong with stopping for your mental/physical health, making a back up plan and combo feeding or plain old just not wanting to.

People will make these choices based on their experience and needs. I understand how it might look like it’s undermining breastfeeding but being informed and empowered to make the choices that help it great and help more mums and babies in the long run.

MajorCarolDanvers · 03/02/2023 08:49

MajorCarolDanvers · 03/02/2023 08:47

It's not surprising that the UK has the worst breastfeeding statistics in the entire world

Not enough support and mixed messages everywhere.

And then every thread about breastfeeding is jumped in by people telling you how 'awful' it is.

Sistanotcista · 03/02/2023 08:49

getmeacupoftea · 03/02/2023 08:44

I cried and cried and cried and felt like the worst mother in the world and that I didn't deserve my son after I struggled to breastfeed through the awful pain of an excruciating emergency c section, not to mention it felt like cheese graters on my nipples every time he latched.
The message got through that breast is best. Don't worry.

@getmeacupoftea - just wanted to send you a hug. This is so similar to my experience, which meant that my first few months of motherhood were spent feeling like and abject failure.

Sistanotcista · 03/02/2023 08:49

Argh! *An abject failure

Twizbe · 03/02/2023 08:50

Advertising is clever.

If someone asked you which is the best formula, you could rattle off a few brand names. Not everyone knows that in reality they are all the same.

Having an article that tells you to pack formula for hospital sends the message that you won't be able to breastfeed. Even if only slightly, that seed is there.

If a woman post on here for breastfeeding support she's always told to use a bottle or that it's ok to stop, even if that isn't really the support she's after.

Just yesterday a woman who's successfully breastfeeding posted about others wanting to feed her baby and was told repeatedly that she should express or give formula so others can 'bond'

There's a really good book about why the politics of breastfeeding matter.

I'd also suggest people read the info from the WHO on the advertising code and the reason it is there.

Btw I combi fed my eldest and once again I will state that there is NOTHING wrong with choosing to formula feed.

Emmamoo89 · 03/02/2023 08:51

MajorCarolDanvers · 03/02/2023 08:49

And then every thread about breastfeeding is jumped in by people telling you how 'awful' it is.

Show quote history

I know. I get some people can't do it for a lot of reasons but one thing its not awful. I love it. We are meant to breastfeed. But understand why some don't

Boneweary · 03/02/2023 08:51

I agree with you OP, but no one ever wants to hear it.

How you feed your baby should be your own choice. No one should feel forced to breastfeed, and we hear that loud and clear. Funny how feeling forced to formula feed is acceptable though.

Tangerinie · 03/02/2023 08:52

It's a tricky one. To a point, if bf works if works IME and based on what I've seen among other mums. Sometimes it just works and other times it just doesn't despite serious efforts.

More support to help women who want to breastfeed is definitely needed as it is quite patchy. I've heard of some women getting brilliant support and others having to fight to get any and then still not finding it enough.

I haven't noticed any of the sorts of threads you've mentioned tbh, as bf threads do tend to descend into a bunfight, so it's hard to make sense of what people are saying!

I do think though that the message has got through by now that bf is the best option if you can do it. I think that point has been made and the message has been received.

WandaWonder · 03/02/2023 08:53

The old "oh women don't have two brain cells to rub together and they can't possibly think for themselves" seems to creep in everywhere these days

Tangerinie · 03/02/2023 08:53

It works*

amylou8 · 03/02/2023 08:56

With the pressure placed on women to breastfeed I think it's great that people can ask here without feeling judged. I felt guilt tripped 25 years ago because I choose not to BF. With midwives not even being allowed to advise on FF now I can imagine the situation has only got worse. Everyone knows the advice, and offering support or practical help to mums who choose to FF will be doing nothing to discourage BF.

C8H10N4O2 · 03/02/2023 08:56

NorthernExpat · 03/02/2023 08:39

Do you think women can’t be trusted to make their own decisions and so info about alternatives to ebf should be restricted?

Trust me the message that exclusive breastfeeding is the only virtuous choice is heard loud and clear by new mums. Providing information to the large proportion of them who can’t or don’t want to ebf forever is perfectly reasonable in a world where women are adults who can make choices based on a range of information sources.

And yet so few women actually breastfeed in the UK compared to other countries.

Its not about women being "trusted" its about women being able to get accurate and non perjorative information and support to make those informed choices.

WedonttalkaboutMaureen · 03/02/2023 08:57

My PND was in part triggered by horrendous guilt that I wasn't successful at establishing breastfeeding. All I got in hospital and elsewhere was "Breast is best" and I felt a failure. Even if it IS best, it's not for everyone so letting women know that formula is fine too is so important. We haven't "failed" our babies.

My child is now a strapping 6 foot teen with a very healthy immune system and those days of agony are long past but I haven't forgotten the feelings of guilt shame and like I was the worst mother. I really hope others reading this know that their babies will be fine too.

InDubiousBattle · 03/02/2023 08:57

It's really clear that the MAM threads are sponsored threads.

I know of several women (myself included)who had genuinely awful experiences of breast feeding. I know of several women (myself included) who had good experiences of breast feeding. I think hearing from both is valuable.