Antibreastfeeding?

[Redebs]

Having just browsed some of the 'Help articles' on here, I'm shocked at how Mumsnet is discouraging breastfeeding.

There's one on how normal it is to wean off the breast at two months because of all the 'problems you will have'.

There's one on 'combi feeding', which is about giving formula feeds to breastfed babies - the surest way to reduce your milk supply in reality.

There's another one about packing dummies and bottles in your hospital labour bag. This is definitely going to interfere with newborns getting colostrum and learning to latch. If a baby needs anything, the hospital will provide it in reality.

I know some women choose to formula feed, but these are insidious, supposedly helpful, undermining tactics aimed at new mothers trying to breastfeed. Most of these are sponsored by the baby bottle manufacturer MAM.

If formula companies were promoting this, they would be, rightly, in contravention of advertising rules.

All medical and scientific advice is to give exclusively breastmilk for the first six months and to continue to at least twelve months or longer.

I'm agree. Such a shame.

It starts young, the messaging.

My daughter was EBF until she naturally weaned at 17 months. She never took a bottle.

She obviously doesn't remember being breastfed and as she's my last has never seen me feed another baby.

Every doll she's had has come with a bottle. She's always fed her babies with a bottle. To her, that's how you feed a bottle. She didn't believe otherwise until she started coming with me to volunteer at a breastfeeding support group.

Why is that so?

My eldest was combi fed but saw me breastfeed his sister. He'd always feed his teddies by lifting his t shirt to feed.

It's a woman's choice how she feeds her child and if choosing to bf when she stops.

I do agree that lack of proper information into bf and establishing it is given before birth and some of the challenges and what to check for.
DS1 had a 90% tongue tie for instance I wasn't told this would be a issue for feeding until day 3 and the infant support in neonatal was back in (she was part time).

Honestly conversations are needed and proper support needs to be given. My area bf rates are better then most but every town has a bf group run by a trained bf support worker and there is a lactation consultant who visits them as well for free.

Ultimately women shouldn't be guilted into something they don't want to do but if they want to try then they need to be properly supported which is where the UK falls down.

The MN audience is fairly anti-breastfeeding – I’ve lost track of the bunfights filled with “flop them out” and “fully exposed” and “I don’t want to see that in a restaurant, do it in the toilet”, etc – full of misinformation about it (cluster feeding interpreted as low supply/poor quality milk in the evening/hungry baby that needs formula), and MN needs to appeal to that audience.

And MN needs to make money: more money to be made from FF than BF.

👏👏👏

@Twizbe why are you so invested in other women’s breastfeeding choices? I see you all over these threads like a rash, going on and on about the evils of formula and how the slightest thing will ‘damage breastfeeding’ (followed up with a cursory ‘oh but it’s fine to bottle feed of course’ like that makes everything else you said less hysterical).

OP, mind your own business. You sound frankly a bit nuts starting an outraged thread that women put dummies in their hospital bags.

Having just browsed some of the 'Help articles' on here, I'm shocked at how Mumsnet is discouraging breastfeeding.

Which articles are these?

This x 1000

Nothing wrong with formula feeding - I combi myself. But this is why formula feeding should not be advertised openly across the world

howeved I disagree with op that this doesn’t mean that helpful, relevant information shouldn’t be given to women who have decided to formula feed in a developed country

If it’s a woman’s choice and that’s the only thing behind high rates of formula feeding, why is there such a discrepancy between the number of women who want to breastfeed and the number who do?

I don't think women come on mumsnet and make their decision based on advice from these threads

They'll either choose to breastfeed or formula feed depending on what they find is best for them and their baby

Fwiw I don't find mumsnet anti-breastfeeding. A lot of threads are very encouraging of breastfeeding

One of the main issues with "breastfeeding rates" is the constant "breast is best" mantra being peddled out through your whole pregnancy by midwives etc. It's an immense amount of pressure and can actually have the opposite effect and put woman off.
We know the benefits of breastfeeding, no-one is arguing that. But FF mothers need to know that their choice is also perfectly valid.
I'm all for supporting women who know they want to breastfeed, I am all for giving women who are unsure all the information they need to make an informed decision.
What I do not agree with is if someone has asked for advice re combi feeding, switching to formula, struggling, wanting to give up and the responses are "formula is poison, formula babies don't thrive, you just need to try harder, just get past it" to the detriment of the mother's mental health - it is NOT ok.

I think it’s easy as a soon to be mum to be worried if you can’t breastfeed, and I definitely panic thought I needed to stock up just in case! But we live in a place where if we need it there’s a shop open to buy it 10 mins away. If your plan is to breastfeed then that’s your plan! Hospitals and midwife centres have the just in case newborn bottles. And I know a lot of mums who didn’t want to breastfeed too, or couldn’t in the end, so good to have resource or known resource.
I harvested colostrum as well just in case. And I’m still breastfeeding my 20 month old ! She was tongue tied, it was a hard but worthy journey ❤️

Couldn't have said it better. FF mums are made to feel lesser than by some (not all, by any means) EBF mums. It's quite nice to see it being noted as a valid choice when mums who do want to EBF are very certain on their ideas.

It also takes pressure off mums who do want to EBF but find they struggle.

If you truly believe in women’s choice then there is no ‘right ratio of breast to formula feeding’, that’s just a projection of what you think is acceptable.

The fact is the health benefits of breastfeeding are not big enough for many women to feel it’s worth their time/energy/mental health. And therefore it isn’t worth other people getting worked up about it either. Focus your energy on parents who are doing things to actively harm their kids, or child nutrition in general which has much longer reaching effects than whether they were breast or formula fed.

The fact some people take it upon themselves to go off on a crusade about something that is negligible in terms of a child’s health and frankly none of their business suggests to me this is more about their own ego than the health of children.

Yet start a thread about kids being fed Coke and Mars bars for lunch and they’re nowhere to be seen 🤷🏼‍♀️

Because a lot of them try it and then decide it isn’t for them and change their minds? Because the reality of being glued to a sofa for hours when they have other small kids isn’t practical? Because they end up in more pain than they thought they would and don’t want to do it? Because they get a bad case of mastitis and don’t want to risk it again?

I mean it’s not hard to think of a few scenarios which would mean an ‘idea’ doesn’t pan out in reality.

I hope times have changed ,but when I had my first child whose now 16 ,there were lots and lots of information about how breast was best ,but little in the way of support for women who wanted to breast feed but we're struggling .

Of course, another idea is that they really wanted to, but couldn’t, and no help was available.

At a time when a lot of mums are tired and emotional, they need proper support when needed, accurate non biased information when needed and for people to not interfere when they don't need help or advice. There are plenty of reasons why women don't breastfeed. Either they don't want to or because they can't or because the baby can't. All are valid reasons. I got so many judgy comments from people when I didn't breastfeed. When I blushed and muttered something about how formula was best for us at the moment the breastfeeding peer supporter said she didn't realise my baby was a calf and did one of those annoying tinkly laughs.

There’s plenty of help out there, but for a lot of posters on here nothing will ever be enough. There’s breastfeeding groups, lactation specialists, articles, YouTube videos, La Leche League (which have a phone line), books, online support.

If you’ve utilised all of those and it’s still not working out then it probably won’t, regardless of what you do. I think some people can’t accept this though and blame ‘lack of support’ when it was there but for whatever reason just didn’t work.

Shoot me! I’ve just packed dummies and formula in my hospital bag…..because I want to. It works best for me and my family. If other woman don’t want to I’m fine with that. I don’t feel the need to judge their choices.

I gave my second born a dummy in the hospital when he was a day old. He nursed straight after birth but his first proper feed was (shock, horror) formula because I was so exhausted after an epidural, no sleep and no food for 24h he wasn't able to get anything from me and neither of us were able to sleep as a result. He breastfed fine from then to over a year.

Mothers don't need dogma in those early days, they need choices. Whatever works for you, your baby, your mental health - as long as baby is healthy and fed and mum is able to look after her physical and mental wellbeing, it is all good. Breast milk isn't some magic unicorn syrup and formula isn't the devil. Nor are dummies. And mothers are perfectly capable of making their own decisions on how to care for their babies without interference or judgement from others.

I don’t actually disagree with any of that @elliejjtiny but it goes both ways.

If a woman saying ‘I would like to formula feed’ has to be respected, so does a woman saying ‘I would like to breastfeed.’

It isn’t. My experience (both on here and in RL!) was that as soon as we had difficulties it was very much ‘oh never mind, here is the cow and gate. My DS was formula fed from birth and is six foot and a rugby player. My friends DD was breastfed and is always ill.” And so on and so forth.

Particularly from professionals, a woman should have support in how she wants to feed.

If you wanted to FF, think how distressing it would feel to be forced to breastfeed. That’s what happened to me in reverse. And yes, I still am pissed off about it.

Don't worry - the 'breastfeeding is the only way' propaganda is in full force through the midwives, health visitors, GPS etc. Just respect women enough to let them make their own choices please. Post birth is often the most vulnerable time in a woman's life and she needs support, not pressure.

I agree too OP.

The advertising on Mumsnet is in contravention of the WHO International Code on advertising formula milk as it includes bottles, dummies etc. Although I don't think UK law goes that far.

It's a shame that breastfeeding is undermined like this by a website for mothers.

However someone wants or ends up feeding their baby information should be provided free from commercial interests.

Yanbu op.

I've only ever breastfed but the pressure to formula feed has been insane! It's not fair.