“Oh, you look rather tired!”

[macaroonsandgin]

A neighbour (who I hardly know) said this when she saw me on our road earlier. I do have a five month old but I hadn’t thought it was that bad 😳

Any tips for how to avoid these kinds of comments in future, bearing in mind the obvious restrictions on time re the five month old?!

Thanks all 😁

🤣🤣

another one I like is "tired? thank fuck, I thought I looked gravely ill. cheers!"

sod them all

Were you wearing makeup? Because we've become so used to faces with make up on that if I haven't got it on I get told I look tired. In fact I always knew when one of the women at a previous job was going to go home sick, she wore next to no makeup when she usually wore a lot - all the men thought she looked a little "ill"....(including her boss).

I'd laugh and say "I am!", and ask her if she'd like to come and do some babysitting while you have a nap 😆

@OrderOfTheKookaburra sadly I was wearing makeup, yes.

I sadly have also experienced being told I look tired when I’m not wearing makeup… by my former (male) boss.

I wish I had the courage to say ‘so do you’ next time this happens as per a couple of PPs’ very witty suggestions!! 😂

I know this is not the point of your thread but I actually love when people tell me I look tired. I feel tired most of the time so I feel ‘seen’ and that someone knows my pain!!

Ugh. MIL used to say this as we arrived at their house on a Friday night when I'd been working full time and commuting all week, then driven 3+ hours on a Friday night to spend the weekend with them. Made me want to turn around and go home again.

The looking tired comment tends not to bother me too much, but I get "oh you look well" whenever I put on a bit of weight and I find it really insulting. I'm on medication that means my weight is up and down and it's been a while since I was my usual size. Does wonders for my confidence that remark...

Someone said that to me once. I replied that's because i am!

I always get this comment too. Inside I end up thinking ‘wow, so the rest of the time I look ill then’. It’s a real backhanded compliment for someone to say ‘you look well’, like they are surprised!

Yes I hate that too. Or my aunts not so subtle "you like pies don't you" 😳

I get this a lot and think it's a veiled insult

I suffer from both insomnia and unrefreshing sleep

I am sick of hearing it, especially if delivered patronisingly

I always get told I look tired if I appear without mascara.
Depending on context, I interpret it as an offer to make me a cup of tea. “Thank you, yes, I do need a sit down, put the kettle on.”

If someone says this to me I say 'oh, well it must just be the way I look as I'm not tired at all'

Try coming from my culture where when you get fat they say "you look so big/robust and strong"..... and can't understand why you're insulted..... great, I have enough weight on my to survive a famine.... cheers for that.....

Was going to say this but you've said it yourself.

Why on earth are you jumping through hoops to appease someone who was rude to you?

It never bothers me when someone says I look tired. I don't think anyone means anything awful by it.

like another poster says, I don’t mind this.when I have a 5mo I’m exhausted, it seems only fair that people recognise that and acknowledge it a little. Why try and pretend it’s all easy? Then the should be close family people who don’t want to help can’t say you are breezing through this! And I can snap at my husband that Jane Doe on the street can tell I’m exhausted but you want to know where that letter is? If you opened your own mail or ever filed anything you’d know, and my memory banks are closed for fatigue leave.