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Original poster

What are your unpopular parenting opinion?

246 replies

michellet86 · 09/01/2023 16:55

There is no right answer to all t he parenting chive we make daily. I'm interested to hear everyone's opinions

Mine is that you don't need to rush your kid to A&E for anything unless it's life, limb or loss of eye sight. A&Es are already packed with kids who don't need to be there

OP posts:
MichaelFabricantWig · 09/01/2023 18:20

Home schooling is ridiculous and shouldn’t be allowed.

HiccupHorrendousHaddock · 09/01/2023 18:21

That being bored is good for them. Life isn't all stimulating and fun, learn to sit with your own thoughts, learn to enjoy your own company.

awakenme · 09/01/2023 18:21

It's ok to lock them in a cupboard when it all gets a bit much.

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JesusHeKnowsMe · 09/01/2023 18:21

@Iam4eels that's not actually what I said tho! Try re-reading before snapping back.

porpy · 09/01/2023 18:24

Parenting a child with SN is vastly different to parenting a neurotypical child, and parents who have no kids with SN have no place judging or critiquing, or advising.

QuestionsFromThePublic · 09/01/2023 18:25

Snacks are unnecessary. Supper is the most useless, it a delaying tactic. There is nothing wrong with going to bed without having just had cereal or toast. Totally fine with eating if you are hungry. If you eat three meals with lots of fruit and veg, you don't need anything extra.

boobot1 · 09/01/2023 18:26

porpy · 09/01/2023 18:24

Parenting a child with SN is vastly different to parenting a neurotypical child, and parents who have no kids with SN have no place judging or critiquing, or advising.

Absolutely

LaFemmeDamnee · 09/01/2023 18:27

CaramelMach · 09/01/2023 18:11

@WonderingWanda they are sooo expensive for what - some kind of changing room hell and miserable babies !

I loved baby swimming with both my DC and they loved it too. Plus they always napped well afterwards. I know it would have been cheaper to go to a cold drab leisure centre pool outside of lesson time and aimlessly splash, but the nice warm private pool with singing and baby toys was wonderful. Plus pre paying meant I got out and went. So there was lots of point for us. I really miss baby swimming, and I wasn't a big fan of the baby days overall.

Jifmicroliquid · 09/01/2023 18:27

That the world doesn’t, and shouldn’t, revolve around children.

Spannerinthe · 09/01/2023 18:28

I no longer go out of my way to do trips that aren't parks. I once tried a National Trust tour but had to abandon it. My toddler DD was trying to get on an alarmed bed (museum) and I suddenly realised the room was full of parents who were engaged, nodding heads and expressive saying aha,hmmmm, as were their DCs and all I could think was, why are we doing this to ourselves and where do we get a glass of wine?

Holidays with young children are hard work. I tend to avoid where possible. I find other people's DCs annoying unless they are babies.

I let my extremely tall,12 year old go to a busy town centre on her own (bus) and walk 20 mins to the nearest village to go shopping alone. I make her take a phone.

None of my DCs ever had dummies.

I BF my kids, none had a single bottle BUT how I wish I'd have cut myself some slack and gone to bottle sooner. I think it's ok to not want to BF.

I think people go to GP and A+E too readily as others have said.

smileladiesplease · 09/01/2023 18:30

Reins are essential for some toddlers but not all

If you don't talk about sex to teenagers doesn't mean they won't do it just means they will do it un safely behind your back (though hopefully not literally)

Assumed the no alcohol in the house comment was a joke

Lollypop701 · 09/01/2023 18:31

Spare the rod, spoil the child (joking Obs) but children need boundaries and to understand consequences. At whatever age… but to know that mistakes happen and its how they solve it that matters.

JesusHeKnowsMe · 09/01/2023 18:31

I think you misunderstand me. I'm not quipping at anyone with SN. l, never have and never would. That's not who I am so please don't assume or judge.

My point is that we have a swaithe of cba parents now who do the bare minimum by their kids (in more ways than just food incidentally - I'm talking lack or stimulation out of school, leaving them balls deep in a screen all day and not nourishing any of their interests) and then wonder why their children behave poorly.

Flavourflava · 09/01/2023 18:33

It's not that hard to keep young children off screens, you just can't be bothered to do it.

Carouselfish · 09/01/2023 18:33

Regardless, it makes them grumpy zombies.

YetMoreNewBeginnings · 09/01/2023 18:33

It’s entirely normal for Grandparents and Aunties etc to want to spend time with your child.

There should be no set ages on when children walk to school alone/play out with friends/go to the park and it should be entirely dependent on the child.

Lots of children do way too many organised activities and as a result don’t have the ability to deal with being bored, or to creatively solve their boredom.

smileladiesplease · 09/01/2023 18:33

No one should care how you feed your baby. You are not a higher being for BF anymore than any one else is to bottle feed. Keep opinions to yourself.

No such thing as a natural birth just birth.

RogersOrganismicProcess · 09/01/2023 18:34

My unpopular opinion is very unpopular, but here we go. After working with early years and KS1 children for 20+ years. Not all parents who think they have a ND child, have a child who is ND. Some of it is down to shitty parenting.
Puts on hard hat.

Iam4eels · 09/01/2023 18:35

JesusHeKnowsMe · 09/01/2023 18:21

@Iam4eels that's not actually what I said tho! Try re-reading before snapping back.

On poor diet you said that:

"A lot of it now gets hoovered up/palmed off as some kind of neurological issue when actually it's just that they've managed to win the battle of wills when it comes to eating."

Which is completely untrue and has no basis in fact.

You don't get mistakenly diagnosed with a neurodevelopment condition that is actually caused by poor diet. You either have a neurodevelopmental condition or you don't.

Iam4eels · 09/01/2023 18:35

porpy · 09/01/2023 18:24

Parenting a child with SN is vastly different to parenting a neurotypical child, and parents who have no kids with SN have no place judging or critiquing, or advising.

True that.

Tonsiltrouble · 09/01/2023 18:35

That it’s ok to lose your shit sometimes too. In fact if DC never see that you sometimes have trouble managing your own feelings they will find it harder to learn to manage theirs. But also, children do need to understand that their actions, or lack of action does impact on others. Everyone has limits and people in the real world might not be so forgiving.

That losing your shit is less important than what you do about it later, eg apologising, reflecting, growing.

HotSauceCommittee · 09/01/2023 18:36

Punishments just make your kids dislike you and much more likely to lie to you. They don't work, life and all of its situations usually have natural consequences.

JesusHeKnowsMe · 09/01/2023 18:37

RogersOrganismicProcess · 09/01/2023 18:34

My unpopular opinion is very unpopular, but here we go. After working with early years and KS1 children for 20+ years. Not all parents who think they have a ND child, have a child who is ND. Some of it is down to shitty parenting.
Puts on hard hat.

🙌🙌🙌

Kitcaterpillar · 09/01/2023 18:38

I think if people are going to read this thread, they need to not take the opinions personally and start arguing the toss? People are probably going to have opinions that are shitty and/or you dislike on a thread called 'unpopular opinions'...