Polite ways of telling guests it’s time to leave

[Iwritethissittinginthekitchensink]

I want to get better at this - enjoying people’s company in my house eg for an afternoon or evening, but when enough is enough how to politely indicate it’s time to wrap things up and for them to go?

Just wondered if anyone has stock phrases you rely on!

Yes, this.

I've realized since my autistic DS came along that not everyone picks up social cues very well, and things like "would you like another cup of tea?" can be taken literally without the other person meaning to be rude and staying beyond their welcome.

I've developed a similar technique. "I'm going to have to kick you out soon because (insert reason), but it's been lovely having you over. I've really enjoyed it". All said with a smile and genuine warmth and friendliness. Nobody is ever offended.

That will have the opposite effect, as it suggests you want people to stay.

With my friends, on the rare occasions I do want them to head home, I stop topping up their glasses!

I do this....

It's not rude and loads of my friends do the same!

If it's late I simply say, right I'm going to have to kick you out now as I'm tired and the kids will be up early......

With humour you can get away with anything - I just tell people to f*ck off because I’m going to bed and they take it fine. 😁

I start giving one word answers and being a bit boring and when that doesn't work, I pretend that I've arranged to go to my Mums house for a coffee.

I'm a bit socially inept though so..

Personally I wouldn't give a time to leave unless I actually have something on although I think if it's evening you could say you go to bed early eg (borrowing PP wording) "anytime from and then we have a few hours to catch up as I get ready for bed around 10"

offering a cuppa usually gets people to leave

but some people are particularly bad at this and don't take the hint

i have a family member who takes a hint and says "yes it's late I will go now" but then doesn't go!

I remember when DH and I were TTC and I just wanted her to go so we could DtD and go to bed!

Some friends of ours came over and the guys were having such a lovely time that our male friend didn't want to go. His wife kept saying let's go and he wasn't taking any notice. In the end I suggested to her that she just go home as I was going to bed! When I came into the room with my pyjamas on my husband realised I was serious and buddled him out of the door!

I use my DC, announcing they need to have a bath and start clearing up.

Years ago when I flat shared, we had a new year's eve party, guests were still there the next day, talking about what were we going to do for lunch.
My flatmate just asked directly in a fed up voice ' when are you leaving'.
I could have kissed him

Start yawning and saying ‘I’ll have to go to bed soon, it’s been a busy old week’.

@Cococomellon
Oh god I have a mum friend that says she's about to leave and then she stays for an hour or two more.

I had a 2 year old and a new baby and my baby was crying on and off for hours and wouldn't settle. She came over and didn't leave for about 4 hours despite the crying & me dropping massive hints saying she was overtired and needed sleep but she couldn't sleep with any noise (actually true). After 4 hours, I snapped and said I needed to get her to sleep and she needed to go. I've never seen anyone rush out of my house so fast. I felt awful after though.

We have one friend that really doesn't take the hint... takeaway arrives, still there for an hour...yawning, still there for an hour... the "early start" line, still there for an hour!

Following for ideas!

I'm an unsociable bugger. I never invite anyone round. I can't think of anything worse than wanting peace and having to make smalltalk.

Just set off the smoke alarm, then run into the room in a panic, saying ‘You need to get out, now!

Once they run out of the door, shut and lock it behind them.

If you never have anyone around, you never need to ask anyone to leave, so 🤷🏻‍♀️

And generally, with friends and family (people you like and know well), you don’t make small talk.

These are great. I tell guests that my dog wakes us up really early and I need to get to bed, that usually works even though I don’t really mean for them to go. On New Years Eve we had a house full, at around 1 am I started turning off the Xmas lights, this got the last few out.

My uncle who was very sociable, but also a farmer with 4am starts would just say “ right- I’m off to bed. Stay as long as you like” 🤣

Yawn, turn the lights off and say goodnight. They should get the hint! 😂

But yes- I favour the “ I’m kicking you out in 5”
direct approach. Another friend had a bell which he’d ring and shout “time at the bar”.

The old stand up, slap knees, "Right then!" works a treat.

Well I'm German so it's

Slap the thighs
Stand up
Say 'So' .. 😂

We always say "so I think we're going to be calling it a night in a minute/soon" clear, always works and can't/haven't had to think of anything else.

Wow, that really helps the OP deal with her situation, so helpful!!

Right?!

I get the hoover out and tell them all I need to tidy up before bed.

Always works. No-one ever offers to hoover for me 😀