What was your life like this time three years ago?

[PrunellaDeVil]

Name changed for this but I’ve been here a long time.

I was getting ready to take the kids back to school this morning and it made me think about how different our lives were before the pandemic.

Then: kids were in wraparound care daily, DH and I drove or took the train to the office early every day, regularly travelled at weekends to see friends who lived an hour or so away, and took holidays abroad. You’d go into work with a cough or cold without thinking. Socialising after work was a regular thing…I miss nights out in London but not the childcare nightmare it caused.

Now: we both work from home most of the time, we walk the kids to school in the mornings. We spend a lot more time with friends who are local. The kids much prefer being at home when they can. Foreign holidays are rarer due to the hassle/cost/availability. People seem much more cautious to stay at home when ill, and our elderly relatives are still very worried about socialising with anyone who is around germs or young children (pretty much the same thing). We have friends who lost loved ones and aren’t over the trauma three years on.

How have your lives changed since pandemic?

Old life, we were out at least a couple of times a week eating & drinking.
Regularly seeing family & friends and having holidays.

DP is CEV so life has changed drastically. Even with antivirals there is still a huge risk of death. I’ve aged a decade in the last couple of years. ‘Haggard’ is how I was recently described. My MH is shot, my physical health has gone down hill. We don’t go anywhere socially, hardly see family & rarely see friends. Sometimes it feels like I’m living through a nightmare and I just can’t wake up.

I had given my DH an ultimatum that ended at the end of 2019. I was planning my next move. Left him Feb 2020 when my daughter was only just 1. Big changes!

Pre-covid,working FT in NHS. My kids in nursery FT . Things all on track,FT nursery. Partner and I worked FT
We were briefed covid was coming, trained in PPE, staff redeployed to other areas, frankly it was terrifying.I remember at the height of covid crying in staff toilet, stressed and tired. But frankly I’m a bit broken
I don’t reveal the extent of the trauma to my dp he’d only worry. I do talk to colleagues & mates who are medics. It certainly affirmed to me why I trained and what’s it’s all for.
partner went from a FT corporate role FT in office to hybrid working and at height of covid worked at home

every day I feel bit broken and the NHS is on its knees

I had just got a way overdue promotion in my full time office job. Youngest DC went to after school club a couple of days a week. Meant me driving 8 miles past our house to collect her from there.

Life was hectic, with quick dinners to turnaround before getting kids out to clubs again on those days.

But I got to see lovely colleagues every day.

Now I work for a different company, wfh meant I could get a job with a company hundreds of miles away. One promotion later in that company allowed us to buy a bigger house and move to where wanted to live. All in all better, but I miss people.

Then: I was just getting into enjoying Dc4 who was 9 months. I was studying, just set up a new floristry events business & looking forward to our holiday in March. DH was working hard & business was good. 3 other Dc were loving preschool, life and Dc1 was just beginning to settle and enjoy reception at school.
Now: still studying as deferred last two years. Business didn’t survive and as new qualified for zero help. Still no holiday as it was cancelled in 21 & 22. Dh’s business struggled but survived. Dc ok but one is behind and awaiting dyslexia assessment. I am considerably worse off financially, tired, angrier, fatter and 2 years behind in my plans. Going to turn it around this year.

Youngest dc was 2, also 2 older dc, DH was a SAHD and I worked FT. Absolutely on our arse skint, in Council Tax and other utility arrears and racking up card debt, barely getting by.

Now all dc in FT school, I work FT and DH is self employed earning 1.5 times my income. Far far better off financially and actually enjoying having some money to spend.

Oh and we have a dog now 😊

I was living and working in central London, going out often and starting to look at flats to buy!
We've now sold our flat, brought another house in South London, gotten a dog and now planning a wedding!

Fatter, less stressed. Went from being snowed under and burnt out, to WFH, to one of the Great Resignation. Less money, more time.
Less foreign travel, less crowded events, festivals, etc, less restaurants and city breaks, much more infection wary.
I miss my adult DC and their families, but seem to have got out of the habit of visiting them much, it's weird.

If I don't watch it, I will become a recluse.

I was working away part of the week and had a couple of hospital procedures looming ( I’m not sorry to have seen the back of either), but other than that I’d say my life is pretty much the same apart working home an extra day a week.

I was 100 lbs lighter!

Pretty similar to now. Working as a teacher, too many hours, too much stress.

Only now, thanks to shoving us back into classrooms with no masks, no protection and no way of distancing in the midst of a global pandemic, I'm now doing the same whilst struggling with Long Covid and my health has been permanently damaged.

I was traveling a lot for work and under pressure to work long hours to secure my job. I was frustrated with work and wanted to be more secure before having a child. DH and I resolved to go on lots of holidays, attend plays, galleries ect. We got to one play before COVID.

Life is much much better now. Baby, secure job, no work travel, mostly work from home

Travelling around the country for work, working for a horrible boss who I hated.

Now I'm mainly wfh and my boss is alright.

Managed to get to management level in a different organisation.

I had not yet been ostracised by my brother for not believing transwomen are women.

Last year was the hardest year. This year will be better.

Ooh, good thread! We were living in a lovely rented house, both working in offices full time. DC sometimes at after school club and life was hectic and stressful fitting everything in. I was about to ask my manager if I could WFH one day a week 🤣 Didn’t dare as that wasn’t the culture 🤣

Now live in a lovely home we’ve bought, same jobs but much more flexibility with WFH half the week and as a consequence, fitting in the DCs activities is a lot easier. Financially about the same, priorities slightly different (cost of living crisis has hit to an extent too). Secured mortgage before the rates went mad.

I think the DC have suffered schooling-wise. Their school wasn’t the best when it came to online learning and despite doing loads with them at home, I think they really really missed out. Going back to school was a shock as some parents had done nothing (for whatever reason, not a criticism) and there has been a lot of repetition, which they find boring. Got a private tutor from September and that’s really helped get them back on track. They missed out on a lot socially too, nativity plays, that kind of thing. Stuff you can’t get back.

March-May 2020 I do have some fond me memories of. Lots of time in the garden and it was sunny - didn’t relish queuing round the supermarket and it was so stressful but there were some happy times.

Jan 2020 working hard in the office 5 days a week. Now work harder in the office 3 days a week and two at home. It is harder to get staff.

Apart from that no changes. Lockdowns were utterly miserable and I never want to see another one.

That's so sad OP. I don't know if it helps, but I love and support the NHS so much. Thank you for the job you do x

For me, I don't know if anything has changed. I love my life and my job - although schools are so underfunded it's ridiculous. I'm happier than I've ever been coming out the other side.

We both had jobs DH loved his, mine was so so but worked around the kids

We had a lot more money, we socialised with friends and family had regular dinner events, health issues under control

covid hit, kids at home for 4 weeks, dh was on furlough for a while, then made redundant, I was classed as a key worker so worked through it (despite being CEV)

Now completely broke had to move which cost us ££££ no savings, a chunk of debt, we don’t socialise much anymore rarely see friends and family, haven’t done a meal for years, I’ve found out who really matters and who doesn’t, and discovered I could happily just have dc and dh for company.

health issue have gotten worse as I’ve had no regular contact with my consultant slowly getting better but trying to access anyone is hard work

now as I enter 2023, dh has a job (which he hates) I’ve started a new job (so far so good and a lot more money) I have a clear plan of where I want to be in 12-24 months will move heaven and earth to get there

I may even join a gym as I’ve rediscovered my love of swimming and want to get fitter.

Im feeling More positive today last week I was a bloody mess but given myself a good talking to

I was struggling to get over a horrible virus 3 y ago (??). Work was busy and tiring (NHS) but normal busy, and I was looking forward to a weekend break in Feb, a long haul holiday in the summer and loads of gigs. 3 teen dcs were doing OK in school, 2 of them in exam years.

Now, my job in the NHS feels entirely unsustainable. Every day's a battle and I feel entirely depressed. Eldest DD dropped out of uni after 1 y, just not prepared for life and covid study was just awful. Youngest DD has MH problems which we struggled to access support for during the pandemic. She actually did OK once the pressure of school was removed but is very anxious and has had difficulties with reintegration in society post covid. Middle dc is OK, thankfully. Me and dh were both keyworkers during the pandemic, I know it's been difficult for everyone. I guess we were fortunate not to lose any loved ones.

I was more naive, more trusting, more optimistic, thought the world was a better place than it is.

Myself and then fiance were living in a flat in the city centre, both working v hard and saving for our wedding in October 20. Ended up getting pregnant by complete accident in lockdown and now living in a house in the suburbs with DD nearly 2 and second baby on the way (v early tho). We eventually got married in a October 21.

I love my life now but covid destroyed my career, I was furloughed for months as were most employed musicians, and it’s taking forever to become physically able to perform to the standard I’d got myself to in 2020- add a pregnancy into the mix and honestly I struggle to do my job properly now.

Also will never get over the trauma of giving birth in the second lockdown and labouring for hours on my own. Really dreadful.

Pre Covid I was engaged with married. Wfh one day a month now 2 a week. Dd in wraparound less as well. I was still friends with my best friend who went mad over Covid and now doesn't speak to me but I met some other friends

Red Zone, ICU. We had security guards stopping idiots just walking in. We didn’t have the correct PPE at first and it made you sweat like a pig. The briefings were chilling: the reality was harrowing. I remember picking a young nurse off the locker room floor and putting her in the shower. Exhaustion and dehydration was a bit problem. Hearing relatives screaming down the phone stays with you. Face masks and hot showers didn’t do much for your face. It was like being in a war zone but I wouldn’t say I was broken by it. I kept a detailed diary of it. One day I’ll write it all up.

They should say engaged now married

I don’t feel the same need to go away or on holiday. Partly because of all the airport hassle earlier this year, partly it just doesn’t feel quite as safe anymore…I used to travel a lot, all over the world. Also partly we moved just before lockdown to a much nicer house and garden….

I was about to move out of an unpleasant living situation and come back to my hometown for a fresh start. My fresh start lasted 2 weeks before I had to self isolate as CEV.