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Original poster

Just need to rant!!!!

57 replies

FewWinesIn · 30/12/2022 21:53

So just going to start off. My boyfriend (who is the father of my son) has a brother and wife who I can just tell despise me

It was recently our sons (1st) birthday. Everyone either side asked for something to get him. I give little things I don’t expect family to get massive gifts. His brother never asked. I gave the benefit of the doubt in that maybe with 3 kids and a loan to pay for the recent wedding, they didn’t have much spare.

The amount of gifts doesn’t bother me! He’s 1 and tbh I ended up asking for family to buy him pjs or clothes because he doesn’t need anymore toys etc! It’s the thought in them and family time that matter on the birthday.

so, they hand a wrapped gift. I thought this is nice!

they got him a girl toy? Now again it’s not me wanting a big lavish gift - but at least buy a gift for my son, that is for boys?

I thought it was really thoughtless and people have agreed with me

My boyfriend sits on the fence a lot he wants to be neutral but him and other family members see his brothers wife steers him and pupeterrs him a lot. But wow

id rather they just didn’t wrap that gift and gave it to a little girl instead

No arguments over toys and gender etc here please - this gift was clearly given as a big message of “watch us be completely thoughtless”

OP posts:
frylite · 30/12/2022 21:59

But honestly it doesn't matter. Your baby won't care that it's a girl toy.

HassallGreen · 30/12/2022 22:02

I just can't imagine what a 'girl toy' for a one year old is!

DuplicateUserName · 30/12/2022 22:03

Was it a set of ovaries and a vagina?

PopUpMoon · 30/12/2022 22:04

What is a girls toy?

HassallGreen · 30/12/2022 22:05

DuplicateUserName · 30/12/2022 22:03

Was it a set of ovaries and a vagina?

😂😂😂

Original poster
FewWinesIn · 30/12/2022 22:05

Yep thought people would take it wrong :)

my
point was there was no thought behind it. The tape had been opened with a knife already across the seal so seems to be a regift

it was a doll and a pram ! So yes I get he won’t really care it’s not that
its the lack of thought behind it

if they were struggling with money I’d completely understand not getting him anything

OP posts:
Whowhatwherewhenwhynow · 30/12/2022 22:05

Genuinely curious what toy it was, because at that age I can’t imagine what would be suitable for a girl and not a boy.

I’ve often bought dolls for small boys in my family, simply because I know many young children like them and many boys never get given one.

Smartstuffed · 30/12/2022 22:06

I wouldn't get worked up about it. Once you've thanked them you've done your bit and you can decide whether to keep the toy or do something else with it.

You can adopt the 'Water off a duck's back; not rising to the insult' approach as if they're just useless tools.

Whowhatwherewhenwhynow · 30/12/2022 22:06

FewWinesIn · 30/12/2022 22:05

Yep thought people would take it wrong :)

my
point was there was no thought behind it. The tape had been opened with a knife already across the seal so seems to be a regift

it was a doll and a pram ! So yes I get he won’t really care it’s not that
its the lack of thought behind it

if they were struggling with money I’d completely understand not getting him anything

Is a regift not better than them getting him nothing but. Could it be from a charity shop because they couldn’t afford new?

frylite · 30/12/2022 22:07

So they regifted a new toy. Maybe they are skint? So what?

healthadvice123 · 30/12/2022 22:07

A boy can play with a doll and pram , its role play
Your dp I guess pushes the pram and holds his baby
They prob thought it was a good gift as you were unlikely to already have etc

Brefugee · 30/12/2022 22:07

OH NO! A boy was given a "girl toy". Are you worried his penis will fall off, OP?

If you don't want him to have it, fine, get rid. But many boys love looking after dolls.

HassallGreen · 30/12/2022 22:07

But that's just a toy for a one year old?!

Spenn · 30/12/2022 22:08

Lol at girl toy. It's just a toy. Most toddlers would love a dolly and pram, no matter what sex they are.

WaddleAway · 30/12/2022 22:09

My 3 year old son has a doll and pram. Maybe they didn’t think of it as a ‘girl’ toy?

DuplicateUserName · 30/12/2022 22:09

If you're trying to be controversial here OP, this subject has been done to death, embalmed, buried, dug up and done to death again.

RJnomore1 · 30/12/2022 22:10

That’s nice they’re encouraging your sons nurturing side is it not?

Original poster
FewWinesIn · 30/12/2022 22:10

It’s not the bloody toy. Even my boyfriends mum made a comment about the obvious weirdness towards me, my boyfriend and our son!

ABout the money thing which I’ve mentioned numerous times - I would be happy with no gift - he didn’t exactly look for one he’s a 1 year old

This was a rant not a discussion about gender and quality of toys and peoples money problems

OP posts:
Original poster
FewWinesIn · 30/12/2022 22:11

@DuplicateUserName I mean I’m not but didn’t realise how bloody touchy people get

OP posts:
Coffeellama · 30/12/2022 22:11

Doll and pram is not a girl toy for a one year old, very very common for boys to play with dolls and prams. It’s role play, and boys grow up to have babies and push prams too. And it’s a regift… great! Cheaper, better for the planet and your son doesn’t give a crap either way. You are so ungrateful.

Bemyclementine · 30/12/2022 22:12

Your son will definitely catch the gay.

EVHead · 30/12/2022 22:15

OP it was you who made the toy about the sex of the child, not other posters!

If the big deal was that it was thoughtless, saying that it was obviously regifted as the seal was broken would have made your point.

Pootle22 · 30/12/2022 22:16

I get what you mean OP. You believe they gave your son a present you wouldn't want him to have on purpose. If you're sure they knew this, such as you've commented negatively on boys playing with dolls, then they probably did. But what can you do? If you kick up a fuss you'll be accused of being a dick over gendering toys so say thank you, give it to your son or give it away.

As pp said, I've never known a boy toddler to not want to play with a pram. But your child your choice.

WaddleAway · 30/12/2022 22:16

FewWinesIn · 30/12/2022 22:10

It’s not the bloody toy. Even my boyfriends mum made a comment about the obvious weirdness towards me, my boyfriend and our son!

ABout the money thing which I’ve mentioned numerous times - I would be happy with no gift - he didn’t exactly look for one he’s a 1 year old

This was a rant not a discussion about gender and quality of toys and peoples money problems

But you were the one who made it about the ‘gender’ issue 🤷🏻‍♀️

SallyWD · 30/12/2022 22:16

When my son was 2 he had a doll and pram. He LOVED it! Took it everywhere. It's the only way I could get him out of the house. He'd march along the street with his little pram. Your son may well love his pram too.
If you feel your in-laws did it to be spiteful then just tell them your son adores his gift! That will annoy them.