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Original poster

What just happened?! I don't know what to make of this.

484 replies

Believers · 14/12/2022 00:52

I've had the strangest experience tonight and I don't know how to explain it.

I volunteer with a charity, and tonight myself and 3 others from there went out to a pub I've never been to before for a pre-Christmas drink.

At one point I went to the toilet and as I was on my way out a woman was on her way in. We exchanged pleasantries and went on our separate ways.

About 5 minutes after I'd joined my friends, this same woman came up to us, and sat next to me on the banquette thing. She took my hand and said she had to tell me something.

It was all a bit odd, but I figured she'd maybe had a drink, and I had no objection to her joining us. But then she said to me that she had xxx with her and he wanted me to know that he was happy, that he loved me and that it was time I moved on. She was crying as she said this and I started crying too because xxx was the name of my late dh.

I have no idea how she could've known any of this. None of us knew her, I'd never been to that pub before, dh's name isn't wildly unusual but not that common either, why did she come and find me after our brief encounter in the toilet etc.

I can't get my head around it! Any ideas?!

OP posts:
knittingaddict · 15/12/2022 16:17

Hobbi · 15/12/2022 15:52

Science/technology are tools we use to do things we can't do ourselves like fly, perform fantastically difficult calculations or make Angel Delight. It's a logical fallacy to suggest we should be able to do something that a sophisticated tool/device can do - that's rather the point of them.

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Indeed.

Humans can't scan brains. They can't look through skin and see a broken bone. They can't send pictures to a tv screen or locate ships at the bottom of the ocean. We have designed tech that does all that. Just because a machine can read electrical impuses in the brain doesn't mean that a human will ever be able to do that. No tech will ever be able to receive messages from the dead, any more than a person can.

SnowlayRoundabout · 15/12/2022 16:39

The AI mindreading thing is really limited. What has been reported is one experiment involving only 31 people on one specific face recognition experiement which very limited parameters. Basically, in certain circumstances it can reconstruct a visual field using brain scans. It is a long, long way from telling what people are actually thinking, and certainly doesn't give any suggestion that the relevant techniques could translate across into mediumship.

www.psychnewsdaily.com/this-computer-can-read-your-mind-and-render-your-thoughts-as-pictures/

ancientgran · 15/12/2022 17:24

BloodAndFire · 15/12/2022 14:39

I've got no idea how they do it, or did it in Paul Daniels case, but I know they are tricks.

But you know they are tricks because they tell you they are tricks. What they do appears impossible. I can't explain how they do their tricks and nor can you. Doesn't mean it's actually supernatural. Same goes for the 'psychic' in your story.

In some cases (like the grandad with the button above) it's more obvious, even with such sparse details, that it's very basic cold reading and confirmation bias. Most people in their early 20s are likely to have lost a grandparent, less likely to have lost a parent. Most people of that grandparents' generation are likely to be practical and to nag their grandchildren to do things like sew on buttons, find things, etc. The vast majority of the statements in that reading won't have had any relevance so they are forgotten. Just one fairly generic statement out of 50 or 100 will chime with one of the 1000 little things that has happened recently, and when the person (who has shown their susceptibility by going to the reading) goes away, all they remember is the one thing that did happen to chime with a recent event, not the 99 that didn't (or the 999 events that the 'medium' didn't refer to).

But even the cleverer and more sophisticated ones are just tricks. It's a combination of access to information, guesswork, your memory playing tricks, all sorts of things. Try reading the Wikipedia page on Cold Reading, and watching the Derren Brown programmes. He does and 'knows' things that seem equally impossible. I've seen him live too and it is astonishing.

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Whatever it was it wasn't access to information because she couldn't possibly have known he was going to be called up due to the sudden situation in his country. As to guesswork well it was quite a guess wasn't it. My mind isn't playing tricks, we all laughed about it at the time, well not my sister as I didn't think it would be a funny story for the bride to be. I couldn't have given her any clues as I was quite literally clueless because never in a million years would I have thought it would happen like that. Whatever you might think it is a mystery and I've seen Derren Brown and I've never seen anything like this, not even close.

I'm a sceptic and it happened to me so I can understand people not believing it but that doesn't mean it didn't happen.

She also told me something very personal about me and my now husband which was also mystifying at the time as I'd never met him.

Original poster
Believers · 15/12/2022 17:35

Ok I don't pretend to have all (or any!) of the answers but I just want to say that some of the theories as to how this woman knew about dh just aren't right.

She was sitting at the complete opposite side of the pub to us so too far away to overhear our conversation, especially when you factor in all the other people there were in between us.

We didn't talk at all about dh or about me being widowed or dating or anything like that. After she'd done her piece and left us we were all wondering how on earth she knew and were asking ourselves those same questions. But we didn't cover any of those topics and anyway, as stated, she wasn't sat near us.

I don't have any social media accounts - no Facebook, no Instagram, no twitter, no whatever else there is! I'm not googleable - I've tried it! There were no newspaper accounts or obituaries about dh dying.

I've never been in that pub before in my life, and there was no check in. I have, however, lived here a long time, and my dc do have social media accounts. But I don't know how that would've helped her - how would she know who my dc were in order to look them up?

I'm not saying that there isn't a rational explanation but I am saying that, if there is, I don't know what it is. It seems like an awful lot of effort for her to go to 🤷‍♀️

OP posts:
masterblaster · 15/12/2022 17:47

What's in it for her is that if you follow up... she might be able to scam you for cash.

MMUmum · 15/12/2022 18:25

Driving home from.work one evening I had a thought pop into my head that when I got home there would be a message to say my sister was in hospital because she had crashed her car.
When I pulled up on the drive I heard the house phone ringing, I ran in and amswered it, it was my mum saying guess what? and I said my sister is in hospital.because she has crashed the car, turns out I was right, she had been in a car accident and was taken to hospital, not badly hurt thankfully but I have never been able to explain it. I have had several.similar experiences and it doesn't worry me now

SleepingStandingUp · 15/12/2022 18:43

Believers · 15/12/2022 17:35

Ok I don't pretend to have all (or any!) of the answers but I just want to say that some of the theories as to how this woman knew about dh just aren't right.

She was sitting at the complete opposite side of the pub to us so too far away to overhear our conversation, especially when you factor in all the other people there were in between us.

We didn't talk at all about dh or about me being widowed or dating or anything like that. After she'd done her piece and left us we were all wondering how on earth she knew and were asking ourselves those same questions. But we didn't cover any of those topics and anyway, as stated, she wasn't sat near us.

I don't have any social media accounts - no Facebook, no Instagram, no twitter, no whatever else there is! I'm not googleable - I've tried it! There were no newspaper accounts or obituaries about dh dying.

I've never been in that pub before in my life, and there was no check in. I have, however, lived here a long time, and my dc do have social media accounts. But I don't know how that would've helped her - how would she know who my dc were in order to look them up?

I'm not saying that there isn't a rational explanation but I am saying that, if there is, I don't know what it is. It seems like an awful lot of effort for her to go to 🤷‍♀️

Exactly. On the off chance you'll believe her and then stalk the pub to see her again to beh her to do another reading for cash..

Hatemymiddlename · 15/12/2022 18:57

I used to be very sceptical until I met a medium. She was 100%genuine and she didn't know anything about me, my life and no payment was given. She wanted to give me comfort.
I had lost my little boy six months before and I was absolutely devastated. I was lucky to have my DD and my other DS. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't of got up in the mornings.
She told me things, no-one could ever know. She told me my DD death wasnt my fault. (I blamed myself at the time) I was so worried and spoke to the doctor and was told he had a chest infection which then developed into septicemia. She told me my DS was was his Grandad, knew how my DFIL died, (heart attack) and where he was when he died. Other things relating to family but then she said. You are pregnant, another boy due in August. This was November and no way was I showing, I would of been around 2 weeks. I was adamant she had got in wrong. She told me how I was feeling and not to feel sad. I had my other DC's to love and my DS knows how much I love and miss him. Lots of other things she knew which she could never know. I came away feeling different, she helped me so much mentally. I did have another DS in August and all the other things she said, happened. I felt at peace in a way.

Melx42 · 15/12/2022 19:06

This happened to me just after my mum died. New town and knew nobody. Shopping in sainsburys and a lady approached me pressed some healing stones into my hand and said that your mum loved you very much. Then she left

lauraclose7 · 15/12/2022 19:13

His energy must have been very strong for her to approach you like that, because it’s not standard within the industry. True mediums see energy / spirits throughout throughout the day, but they will not relay it to everyone as they pass them.

In this world we don’t need an explanation for everything. He just wanted to reach out to you and saw a way to do it. 🤍

Original poster
Believers · 15/12/2022 19:14

SleepingStandingUp · 15/12/2022 18:43

Exactly. On the off chance you'll believe her and then stalk the pub to see her again to beh her to do another reading for cash..

Show quote history

But why pick on me out of everyone else in the pub? Also, I appreciate that clever and experienced mediums have ways and means of picking up on things, but I am fairly young to have been widowed and I still wear my wedding rings so no obvious visual giveaways just by looking at me.

OP posts:
CavalierApproach · 15/12/2022 19:32

I’m not a believer @Hatemymiddlename but I’m moved by your post and glad it was a positive encounter Flowers

Sillyname63 · 15/12/2022 19:34

My friend is a medium and said she has messages from spirits and she helps deliver them to their recipients. I am not sure she would approach someone in a pub but others may. I am somewhat sceptical about it myself and why it is her the spirits seem to connect with but obviously she believes they do.

CavalierApproach · 15/12/2022 19:36

vatsucked · 15/12/2022 13:45

One morning I’m my early twenties I was living alone and my button came off my brand new trousers from Primark. I was skint and thought to myself ‘bloody hell I’ll have to buy a new pair now’ … and didn’t think anything of it. I left them in my room, wore something else, went to work and didn’t mention it to anyone.

Later in the day a colleague was going to a medium and asked me to come along. I did and had a reading. She claimed she had my grandad with her. Old-fashioned and practical in his day. As I was leaving, she said ‘Grandad says you should just sew the button back on’.

He was right too. And I did. I had not told a single soul about the trousers that morning.

This is actually pretty wild Shock

Palmfrond · 15/12/2022 19:46

About 20 years ago i was visiting my parents and on the first night after I arrived I had a very vivid dream about finding a very specific and peculiar object on the side of the road between my parents’ home and the nearby village. Lo and behold the next day I was walking into the village and found this very object in the dust by the side of the road. For the curious it was a small broken off part of an obsolete agricultural tool.
I told everyone who cared to listen about this magical event, until I told one particular spoddish, killjoy friend who asked my what I thought the chances were of it being purely a coincidence. One in a million? One in a hundred million? One in a billion? One in seven billion? Next question, how many people are there on the planet? Oh yeah, seven billion, ie it would be extremely unlikely that the most astonishing coincidences don’t happen every day to quite a few people.

user1471453601 · 15/12/2022 20:05

@Believers I'm almost always one of the sceptics when it comes to things like this. But something similar happened to me. I was told, by someone id been on a residential training course with, that a situation I had never ever discussed/mentioned to anyone in the world, was not my fault and I needed to let go of the guilt. he said he'd known that from the moment we'd met a week before, but waited for the last night, because he knew it would freak me out.

he was right, it did freak me out, but he was also right about the guilt I carried.

So, who knows? Not me, for sure

Undaunted77 · 15/12/2022 21:12

I think one of your friends thinks it’s time for you to move on and set this woman up to “give you a message” and then acted all surprised when it happened.

nannykatherine · 15/12/2022 21:23

RUN

Safferssnow · 15/12/2022 21:33

JaneAustensHeroine · 14/12/2022 02:02

This has happened to me before at a bus stop. Innocently sat there, hundreds of miles from home, woman beside me suddenly turned and said sorry to disturb me but she had a message from spirit for me. Absolutely spot on with details.

Unless you have had an accurate mediumship reading it’s easy to dismiss it. However she did tell me one particular thing that absolutely no-one knew that was very much on my mind at that time. She also knew that it was a very special anniversary which she would not have been able to guess.

I hope the message has reassured you rather than disturbed you OP. Some people do have a psychic ability and, while there will be many fakes out there, there are some very genuine people too.

This and this again
I went to a medium in a town I’ve never been to didn’t book in under my name when I arrived yet she was wildly accurate.
It left me shaken for days.
I was a massive sceptic before but unless you’ve had this experience you couldn’t possibly comment or call them charlatans.
My Deepest sympathy for your late DH
6 years or not it will still hurt xxxxx

santasbushybeard · 15/12/2022 21:36

MMUmum · 15/12/2022 18:25

Driving home from.work one evening I had a thought pop into my head that when I got home there would be a message to say my sister was in hospital because she had crashed her car.
When I pulled up on the drive I heard the house phone ringing, I ran in and amswered it, it was my mum saying guess what? and I said my sister is in hospital.because she has crashed the car, turns out I was right, she had been in a car accident and was taken to hospital, not badly hurt thankfully but I have never been able to explain it. I have had several.similar experiences and it doesn't worry me now

I’ve had similar to this.

I finished a night shift and then dropped my then 16 year old son to his summer job at a kids football camp.

I got home and got in bed to have nap. As I switched off the sound on my phone I thought to myself “this will be the day he breaks his leg and they can’t get hold of me”.

Three hours later I woke up to a ton of missed calls and messages.

Ds had broken his leg and they were waiting on an ambulance.

restingbitchface30 · 15/12/2022 21:44

Wow that’s amazing. I believe in these things and would genuinely feel comforted by this.

Kadeywadeywoo · 15/12/2022 21:48

Don't worry about it! He just wanted to tell you that, and needed to find someone who could hear him and then tell you. He was in luck with that stranger, and you received his message. It's a beautiful thing.

Fruitloop34 · 15/12/2022 22:21

She was able to read your mind.
I have been to many psychics and been amazed at the accurate things they have told me, without possibly knowing beforehand. However I now know that they had read my mind, even if I wasn't particularly thinking about the subject at the time.
It's very amazing and clever of them, but not messages from 'the other side'

pollymere · 15/12/2022 22:25

I do believe some people have gifts. There are just so many who don't. I upset people's tarot packs for example. My Dad knew I was pregnant seven days after I conceived. I think this lady was just trying to bring you comfort and felt compelled to tell you. Ghost Whisperer has a lot to answer for!

lightisnotwhite · 15/12/2022 22:36

I agree people can be tricked by the determined. But I don’t believe the person walking up randomly to others can’t be explained by saying they are just trying it on. How many times have you had a stranger come up to you and talk to you about dead relatives.? I’ve never had it nor anyone I know. Surely if they are taking random chances they’d need to try it with more of us?